Cross post from LJ

Spent the evening with Kopper and was in such an exalted state upon my return to my apartment that I couldn’t sleep.  Do you suppose the exercise helped?  Maybe it was the second dinner?

I composed a six minute comedy routine, recited it thrice through and spoke it into my digital recorder. All hail Lady Miss Banjola for reminding me I had one.  Then I woke up with two bizarre things going on simultaneously in my cranium; I woke up dreaming that Mike was crossing from dream life into real life with me as I awoke (I was in full combat gear, and he was in civvies, carrying a package). I was point and as I came around I was going to let him have it with this extremely fine weapon I was carrying and he just grinned and said, “You won’t need that.”

At the same time a really pretty chorus was ringing in my head.  In four part harmony.  I mean ringing.  I couldn’t get out of bed until I’d memorized it, and now I’m going to sing it into Garage Band, much to the disgust of my neighbours as I imagine.

That was a hell of a talk, girl.

Later…. This helped too.

I had no idea

… that Lady Miss Banjola took this picture. There are two awesome things and two awful things about the pic. The first two are that I am very happy I followed Janice’s example and quit dying my hair. I’m even happier I’ve let it grow out. The first awful thing is I LEFT THOSE JARS OF BLACKBERRY JELLY on the table. They were for me (the ones for Loki being already here) and they did not make it home with me. Arg of Argness! The second awful thing is that this picture makes my nose, already a decent size, look ENORMOUS. But at least I’m pictured working on the second verse of the song, which is now entitled “YOU try being Buffy’s Mom.” Considering I haven’t done anything creative in what feels like eons, that’s something.

Foodicles and Canticles

Dinner at Tom and Peggy’s.  I am in a state of repletion to which I may apply words like total, explosive and entire.  Bacon strips over chicken breasts.  Zow.
The second part of my “three songs by January 25th challenge” is now complete.  I have written a Buffy filk about Joyce.  Ahoy, nautilus3, I am now recycling meh-ish songs into Buffy filks.  Ramen! Joss Whedon and Fox own all the characters.
TTTO If I could write a song for you (by moi, couple of years back)

You think I haven’t got a clue –

I’m telling you it’s no small task

To be the Slayer’s single mom

Well how hard can it be?  I’m glad you asked!

She’s constantly in trouble

And spoiling for a fight

But if my girl’s out kicking demon ass I know the world will be all right

Chorus.

I tell her “Get your homework in on time”

“Try hard to be home by nine”

“When I ask how you are, say, “Fine! I just saved the world… again!””

Every season brings a change, the Scoobies fight a new “Big Bad”

And rabid fans don’t think you’re strange if you won’t watch ‘the Body’ ’cause it’s sad!

You must admit I’m special – Buffy could have done much worse

And that I really am the bestest mother in the whole damned Whedonverse!

Chorus

Bridge

Sometimes I reminisce and sift through memories I like

I get all misty-eyed about the time I clobbered Spike

I’ve been assaulted and enchanted, I take Hellmouth stuff in stride

I’m telling you it’s parenthood that’s oftentimes a much more scary ride

It’s all about the teamwork – it’s all about fair play

But I’d appreciate if you don’t ask about my fling with Giles today

Chorus

Repeat “I just saved the world… again!”

Spoken: “That’s my girl!

Note to Lady Miss Banjola… big time lyric changes from tonight’s recording but the shape of the song has not changed.  Suggestions for additional lyrics/verses gratefully accepted!

Xmas Antidotes

Funny cards.

The economics of Xmas giving.

Xmas hate – ten reasons to not like it.  Yes, the list is familiar, but there’s a sophomoric venom to it which I quite enjoy.

My ten favourite things about Christmas.

  1. Carols.  Singing them.  I don’t give a shit if I never HEAR another canned Christmas carol, but singing them is a different story.
  2. A string of dark blue incandescent lights along the roof line of a bungalow.
  3. Cooking up the turkey and having everybody go “ah!” when it comes to the table.
  4. Sitting around the homestead looking at old pictures with the family.
  5. Watching the Alastair Sims version of “A Christmas Carol”….  and turning on the TV just at the right time to catch the “Sisters” duet from White Christmas without having to watch the whole movie.
  6. Knowing that I will never again get exactly what I want for Christmas and being fine with that, because the gift part of Christmas really is for little people.
  7. Not having to beat the kids over the head anymore to write thankyou cards.
  8. Making biscotti all through the month of December and treating people at work.
  9. Listening to my father roar with laughter at the weather forecasts elsewhere in Canada.
  10. I always get cool books from Jeff.

Lusty Neighbors and Pimp Primer

Tea and cookies and porn this evening…
Lusty Neighbors and Pimp Primer –  those were the titles of the flicks we watched at the November meeting of the Royal Vancouver Pornographic Society.  They were grindhouse.  Words cannot describe how execrable they were; they were about as erotic as a panhandler, as aesthetic as an airport washroom, and as well performed as a public school pageant.  The dialogue raised hoots of derisive laughter at every turn.
Porn sure has changed.  Nowadays everybody gets everything depilated and bleached; then, performers did their thang with visible bruises and scuff marks, pimples and back hair.  And dirty feet, yeeech.

Anyway I was welcomed with cries of glee (I made biscotti) and was made to feel right at home.  Things broke up around 10:30; I had the car until one so I gassed up, grabbed some groceries, unloaded them, and then took the car back to its stall (I had the Hyundai – the Prius was engaged) and walked home, where to my disGUST two younguns saw me coming and ran away so as not to be doing dope in front of me.  I halfheartedly chewed them out and told them this is Vancouver and it’s your god given right to smoke drugs in public here.  They offered me some but I declined, although I thanked them for being neighbourly.  God almighty!  Do I LOOK that old?  I was walking briskly enough….

There’s a party next door.  I was invited but I’m not attending. I took biscotti to thank them for inviting me earlier this evening.  I will have enough left over to feed some coworkers tomorrow.  Hey Paul if you read this do you want me to make a batch for your coworkers?

Canuckistani reference

When I first moved to BC, I thought, hey, wtf?  Where’s the bagged milk??  Turns out it doesn’t exist in BC, it’s an eastern Canada thing.

Daughter Katie and I worked on school application stuff for about half an hour last night.  The rest of the time we watched Deadwood. Another convert, yeah!  Then I booked the Prius to take her home.  I hate putting gas in that thing, but someone’s got to do it.

Deep Fried Mars Bar email

Into each life, a little saturated fat must fall.  You have been carefully selected as possibly being the kind of wild and crazy (redacted company name) employee who might want to eat a deep fried Mars bar.  Our talented chef Chris has agreed — with some misgivings — to deep fry Mars bars for us, but only if at least ten people sign up.   As this is a rare culinary delight, I urge you to vote Yes, Please!    Please be advised that they are almost impossible to finish, so consider sharing it with somebody.  Please be further advised that in the tradition of Scottish cuisine (almost a contradiction in terms), you order it with a side of fries.  Your best bet is to plan on eating nothing else that day, and possibly not for 24 hours on either side.  I’m going to draw the line at requesting a doctor’s note, though.  Please be further, further advised that costs will be announced when we have enough people signed up.  Please be further, further, further advised that my distribution list may have missed people who have been dying (possibly literally) to eat a deep fried Mars bar, and that no ill-will is intended if you were forwarded this by someone other than Allegra.

Tapioca

I made some.  This time I soaked the pearls overnight and it is NOM NOM NOM NOM.  (Milk, sugar, tapioca pearls, vanilla, fresh ground cardamom, cinnamon, almond flavouring.)  Hm.  Maybe some salt?

Power shop

patriciaandallegra2007.jpg

Pic is of me and Patricia at the party. Hey nautilus3, recognize that jacket??? (honk, tweet, snicker).
So, between 12 and 2 today, I:

Booked the car and ran downstairs and threw a bag of to-be-recycled clothing in it; drove to Planet Bachelor (having phoned and ascertained that Paul wasn’t there and Keith was) and hung with Keith for about 20 minutes, also unloading two books of Paul’s that ended up over here, taking back Katie’s bag and cleaned clothes and Harry Potter VI and VII AND her volume 2 Strangers in Paradise and a couple of free movie tix for Keith AND Paul’s mickey of Ron Superior which I picked up for him in Santo Domingo; then went over to Highgate to the Liquor Store and picked up Saint Ambroise Apricot (I had no idea it was still available), Stella Artois and Lion Winter; dropped off the clothes at the Value Village on Edmonds and picked up a 20% off coupon; went into the store and picked out 4 dresses and bought 3 (all very frou frou, and one is Allegra brand, so that was a giggle – I had wanted to buy it in Costco 4 years ago and here it was for 6 bucks….), then drove like the hammers for the Bay where I ran up the escalator, located a coffee maker to replace the one I broke (set it on a stove burner and turned the wrong burner dial on, quelle morone), paid for it (and some unscented laundry detergent as an impulse buy at the checkout) and drove home.  I really don’t think all that in two hours is too shabby.

Last night’s party continues to resonate.  They said “eat first” but there were boatloads of food, all really nice substantial appies.  Katie K and I wandered around the Georgia O’Keefe exhibit – the party was at the Vancouver Art Gallery.  She was a remarkable artist, and a remarkable woman, and I think I’m going to look around for a decent bio of her.  I think of all the stuff I saw last night that it was her cityscapes which I found most compelling. I have been trying to think of a word for her style, but I’ll have to use two words instead of one:  recklessly beautiful.

Snide note.  That fecking DJ couldn’t sync a beat worth beans.

The weather today is simply glorious.  I was thinking of continuing cleaning, but I think I’ll go for a walk instead.

Tonight, orchestral music at the Orpheum.  Katie K keeps exposing me to Kultur, and I trot meekly behind, trying like hell to look intelligent or keep up.  Here she is at the party looking glamourous.
glamourgirl.jpg

Feast your eyes on the pictures

Science and other pics.

Last night I had the privilege of introducing Mike McG to Katie K and it’s always a pleasure to introduce two smart funny nice people to each other…. then Mike had to split and Katie and I hung out.  As always, she inspires me to actually COOK so I made…. ta da!  Tortillas, with tex mex seasoned meat, cheddar cheese, red pepper, purple onion, romaine lettuce, tomato and cucumber.  I was under the impression that you had to have a cast iron pan to cook said tortillas, and was pleased that non stick pans work just as well.  I’ve only had that bad of corn flour for two months, it was about time I cracked it open.  Then, evil creature that I am, I said, and for the first time since I moved in – there’s chocolate ice cream in the fridge!  I sure know how to haves me some fun.

Except that I am now migraining.  I’ve popped two T3s and I’m about to get some coffee, but I learned in the DR that if I think happy thoughts and stand up straight, I can actually get rid of a migraine before it starts to hurt.  This morning’s visual sign – it’s different every time because I have (wtf else) ‘atypical’ migraines – was a question mark made of accordioning rainbows which occupied the right upper portion of my visual field before dancing ceilingward and vanishing.

Weird you want, weird you get….

The first thing I watched on my new used TV was Happy Feet from King of Jazz.

No vegetarians need apply

This is a hard bloody place to be a vegetarian in.  They serve meat with every meal.  If you’re a vegan, you’d have to pack your food in – it would be virtually impossible to live here otherwise.

Today, more collapsing gently and beaching.  Plus eating and drinking.  The weather has been gorgeous with the exception of a very well behaved rainshower yesterday.  Katie got a magnificent picture of a jewel green lizard yesterday which I hope to post on my return.

I read her the last 5 chapters of Harry Potter VII and we both cried like idiots.  What’s wrong with me??? I’ve read it already, it’s not like it came as any surprise.

A certain age

I can’t believe how much a simple chat with a friend can cheer one up.

If you are a certain age you will get most of these references (the alphabet in pix). 

Now people want my tapioca recipe. This is terrible, because I don’t have one.  I just stand there stirring, and staring dreamily off into space, thinking about cabana boys.

I have started on the first season of House.

Weeds and Food

I have now watched all of the first season of Weeds, and frankly I loved it, especially the stoner brother in law.  I further loved the notion that the lead could pop a cap in a rat’s ass in her own house without turning a hair, although rats do NOT die if you get them with a pellet gun; they just bleed furiously and vamoose.  Folks, a little realzm, plz.
I am currently cooking a double batch of biscotti for the United Way bake sale at work, and I am also making (daa daa daa daaaaa!) the dreaded Tapioca.  I am going to buy my tapioca pearls from Stuporstore in future, these larger ones take an age to cook.  It’s pushing an hour now.

I am staring at my packing list with panic, fear and loathing. Why am I getting on an airplane?  Why am I travelling so goddamned far?  The weather is going to suck and I’ll probably get dengue fever.