First half of February 2006

Waiting a long time for a bus in Moscow
2006-02-15— Posted by: allegra

Credit Nicholas Danilov, Mosnews.

Valentines day pile up
2006-02-15— Posted by: allegra

Okay, lessee. Because I am a nimnul, missed Peggy’s birthday celebration yesterday, but since I actually was able to herd all of my peeps into one room for a Valentine’s Evening Dinner – Keith and Kate were there! – it wasn’t so bad. I asked Paul if it would be okay to just buy what I felt like eating, so I made garlic bread, bought brie, made cocktail prawns (steamed, not boiled), made salad and microwaved some spinach, and grilled two extremely large steaks. Katie’s in wonderful shape, we laughed ourselves silly.

My seeds from Richters came, and wouldn’t you freaking well know it…. no sweetgrass – no linen flax, and no somethingerotherelse, can’t remember what.

Valentines Day cards for the coworkers went over well, again. This year I bought Fantastic 4, Cookie Monster and Pooh valentines cards; some people are really Tigger fanatics so I ensured they got those cards.

I saw the news about Cheney’s hunting accident and really wanted to post, but something told me to hang back. I’m glad I did. The most interesting consequence of the debacle was watching the leftosphere toss a highly appropriate muzzle on when the victim went back into ICU. The rightosphere will no doubt bemoan the bad taste of the leftosphere in making fun of a serious situation, as a result, but ainsi soit-il. I really wish Cheney would strap his conscience on and publicly apologize. You know it’s not likely to happen. Sigh.

My sundry symptoms are backing off, slowly, as in I’m in a lot less pain almost all of the time – but they’re being replaced by the Saddam’s mother of all colds. Paul’s been a snot factory for the last week – share and share alike, I guess.

I read an interesting item in the blogosphere recently about what to do if you blog and are being stalked. Same as if you’re not blogging and are being stalked. Get some likely lads together with ‘pool cues and table legs’ and administer percussive scalp therapy. That was easy, warn’t it?

Hope you all had a lovely day, and that you didn’t get hosed too bad on the roses.

Really weird dream
2006-02-14— Posted by: allegra

Last night I dreamed that one of my coworkers said, “If you don’t stop sexually harassing people at work I’m reporting you to HR.” This was after fondling him in a fashion that can only be described as non violent sexual assault.

Sigh, and just in time for Valentine’s Day.

Came up with three new bits; the Hyack Festival, Men’s underwear, and That Guy in Marketing, as well as a transitional bit about my probation officer and the perils of walking through your neighbourhood.

I didn’t drink enough water yesterday and I’m really really feeling it today, if you know what I mean.

Time to distribute Valentine’s cards.

2006-02-13— Posted by: allegra

Jumping Jimmy Christmas….??!!! Is there anything Browncoats won’t do???

Stolen from Darcy Michael’s website
2006-02-13— Posted by: allegra

And why the hell not. Mike asked me “Who was that guy” in response to the Laff Riot Girls show closer… and his website is at He’s playing the Urban well on February 21st and I’m going, he made me laugh my ass off. He made a room full of drunks yell “Jihad!”

productive day
2006-02-13— Posted by: allegra

Cleo from across the way gave me chives and irises. I planted the irises but I’m still trying to think where to put the chives. They may end up where I stuck them.

Got ALL my laundry done, helped get the furniture back into the dungeon, did all the laundry that came out of the dungeon (sheets were covered in sawdust and construction gunge), did the dishes when Katie skated off to hang with Dax (grr), made a variant of Chicken Chow-le which got devoured happily by all attendees, weeded the front bed, dumped down some more dirt in same bed, worked some more on songs (this time, the Cairn), noodled around on the internet, worked some more on my comedy routine, found out where all the open mics are in the lower mainland, answered Laurel’s letter and otherwise had a very productive and yet restful day.

My medical condition is responding very well to a beer and water diet. Which reminds me, I should go drink something.

Pic is of Katie, what seems like a hundred years ago, at (I believe) Calgary airport. Paul took the picture.

All funds Canadian dollars
2006-02-13— Posted by: allegra

From the 1979 Radio Shack Catalog.

Jarmo skiing
2006-02-13— Posted by: allegra

Found this on a little used section of the drive. Trent (I believe) took the picture. Jarmo looks naked – but he isn’t. Then Jarmo photoshopped in the earth, and you have a lovely image.

Comedy night
2006-02-12— Posted by: allegra

I came either fifth or sixth, depending on how you calculate these things. Considering that I never consulted my crib sheet and got consistent laughs, I am having trouble identifying what it was that pushed me out of the running, but I will no doubt learn it from the notes provided by the judges (a nice touch). Let us say that I preferred the plaudits of the crowd to the deliberations of the tribunal….

Went to a gelato place on the Drive afterwards to salve my chapped ass (okay, I was applying the salve to the wrong location, or was applying it on the American Plan) and had the strawberry pineapple gelato. It was so good it brought tears to my eyes, and I wish I was exaggerating.

I’m looking forward to my next trek to Seattle. There will be a Open HouseSpit (meeting of the Dunnett fan club) on Saturday, and then Paul and I will pick Janice and Alan up from the airport (they will be arriving back that evening) and then, o then, a lovely day of knocking around Seattle and hanging with the folks, who should be all tanned and rested after a week in Ft Lauderdale or environs.

Off to Zesty
2006-02-12— Posted by: allegra

So I’ll be gigging – it’s part of a standup comedy contest – at Zesty Restaurant tonight. I have no clue when I’ll be going on. I am so nervous I feel jelly-like, but I imagine some of Vancouver’s finest beer will put me in a less frantic mood. Pic is of the venue.

With respect to David Emerson
2006-02-11— Posted by: allegra

May I quote Allen Steele….. “Promises are like turds. You have to make them. You don’t have to keep them.”

Cousin Gerald sent me this
2006-02-11— Posted by: allegra

With the comment ” I believe ‘cool’ would be appropriate to describe this endeavour.”


Squids having sex
2006-02-10— Posted by: allegra

A miracle
2006-02-10— Posted by: allegra

For a small raise in her allowance, Katie has agreed to do all the dishes going forward. This is bloody amazing. I prepaid her two weeks of allowance I was so happy.

Writers Group last night rocked, as always. We write such a large variation of stuff, it’s inspirational. I read My Muse was a Zombie. And brought veggies, in fine UU tradition. We’re getting our own website!

Keith is working later today.

Paul took 100 wheelbarrows of dirt from the construction site yesterday – and yes, he did ask the site supervisor. Okay, I exaggerate.

I have not touched any of my songs! When will I ever get near the computer again?

enough sleep
2006-02-09— Posted by: allegra

Allegra very tired but reasonably okay.

Keith is going to apply to some other Cobb’s locations; Katie is at school and taking Drama and Psychology (talk about yer slack term, I said, to which her response was – uh, no, Psychology is really hard).

Katie cut her own hair. You win some, you lose some.

enough sleep
2006-02-08— Posted by: allegra

Yah! Watched Band Wagon (Astaire, Charisse, Levant, Fabray, Buchanan, and all directed by Vincente Minelli…) last night with John and the kids. It’s a bizarre movie in a lot of ways – we found ourselves laughing a lot when the script is not trying to be funny…. as, f’rinstance, when there’s a big strip of neon proclaiming The GAYEST MAGIC BOX – which should resonate on a number of levels with SOME of my readers. Astaire looks weirder every time I look at him. Worked some more on the Tapioca Song. MAN it’s HARD. The rests are driving me batty.

enough sleep
2006-02-07— Posted by: allegra

Everybody is sleeping peacefully, including Paul. I wish I didn’t have to go to work today. I’d rather be screamed at by a chain of rabid customers than review process documentation all bloody day. Yes, I know it’s for the good of the party.

enough sleep
2006-02-06— Posted by: allegra

This cartoon was so offensive that the Joint Chiefs of Staff fired off a disgusted letter to the Washington Post.

Considering that the US is fighting a ‘technically’ illegal war… (like legality would make it right anyhow) I thought the Joint Chiefs got off quite light, don’t you?

Touched by his noodly appendage part II
2006-02-06— Posted by: allegra

It isn’t safe for work, if that is what you were wondering, unless you work at the BCMP. This is sort of the the CUTE, SQUIGGLY version of a lovecraftian being.

one thing and another
2006-02-06— Posted by: allegra

1. One of my packages came, but due to the incompetence of the Canadian Postal System, I was unable to pick it up the next day, as stated in the tag they left. The fact there was somebody home all day Friday added to my biliousness. Why the farce didn’t they deliver it? Morans.

2. The trek to wellness included a walk along the Fraser foreshore yesterday; Paul thoughtfully picked a walk that included an open, clean and convenient washroom, without which the walk would have been impossible. Katie would have enjoyed seeing more dogs but it was otherwise a very nice walk. There was debris from the storm surge all over the park. I am actually feeling better today.

3. I am continuing to come up with new material for the gig with no apparent effort, which is pleasant. I am in the throes stages of arranging the order for all the bits.

4. Katie continues to be one of the ongoing joys of my life. She has said a couple of things lately that are so poignant, or so funny, that I’ve been dumbstruck – always a good thing, you will no doubt point out. Recently she said, on the subject of God, “The only thing that makes any sense to me is that God created us, got scared and ran away.” This was on Friday night… I don’t know if it’s original to her but it sure made me laugh.

Back to the grind now, thank heaven I have the car.

another fake trailer
2006-02-05— Posted by: allegra

If the link doesn’t work search for Brokeback to the Future and be prepared to snicker.

Friday night Mike showed me a fake trailer for the Shining, which remakes it as a feelgood family movie. That was funny and creepy. OOOOh. Which reminds me. He left weenie goodness here, which I must photograph and post. You will understand when you see it.

notes to the foregoing
2006-02-03— Posted by: allegra

The opening reference is to a Night Stalker episode. I wrote this poem between 10 and 15 years ago; I find it entertaining how some of the images and choices of words now resonate with commercial media like, well, Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The “edge in my voice” is definitely an Ellison reference – the book with that as part of the title was published in 1985 and I think I had just finished reading it when I wrote the poem. I was angry with a friend for trying to get on the gravy train of arts council grants (it would have meant that she had to complete reorganize her creative life to lay hands on some government money and now, of course, there’s no money for that kinda stuff); I was in love with someone who didn’t love me back; there were a lot of street people that I had to navigate through as I did the company banking every day and I had to pass a lot of boarded up businesses.

Since I was doing this zombie like trek up and down Queen Street every day and always getting strange looks from people, this poem resulted. And I just had to write a poem with the word sistrum in it, I have no idea why.

Sundry and various
2006-02-03— Posted by: allegra

Paul’s doing his yoga, his bowl of cereal is gently cooking away in the nuker, and I am taking advantage of the glories of socialized medicine with yet another prescription for antibiotics. This one is specifically for UTI’s (lay explanation: It hurts to pee). So yes, I did see the doctor, and his explanation for my problem doesn’t require surgery but is hard to treat. Yummy yummy mucosa!!! Gee whiz, I can hardly wait for the cystoscopy NOW!

I came up with another great line for my comedy routine. Instead of being all panicky and freaked out I just have a vast feeling of calm about it; Zesty’s at 8 on Saturday the 11th, if anybody is interested. Either Paul is better or it was genuinely funny when I shared the new material with him this morning; he laughed and said the folks will love it.

I think it’s time we had another computer in the house, every time I try to get on Paul is on the computer. It’s ridiculous; two months ago he got on the computer about as often as I do dishes. Speaking of which, Katie has another week to do dishes in payment of her debt to me for buying her another month of tanning. It’s working though – her rash is greatly diminished, and it’s done wonderful things to her mood. I’m thinking of doing it myself. (Not really, but I just wanted to picture my mother’s jaw going CLARN into her lap.)

Katie apparently had only the one cigarette so I can go back to Condition Yellow rather than Condition Full Bore Freak Out with Optional Hysterics and Arm Waving.

That’s about all I can think of for now; signing off from beautiful East Burnaby, this is your Mid Stream correspondent signing off for now…..

Go with the Floe!
2006-02-03— Posted by: allegra

Enuff said. This pic is actually from 1997 and was um, borrowed most cruelly from a US army website. (Okay, WHAT was this moose doing on a US Army website? Ha! No one can resist the call of the moose.) But in my diligent search for the best of moosiness, I will take my chances with the eagle eyed military lawyers….

No job yet
2006-02-02— Posted by: allegra

Keith worked a full day yesterday but that was apparently “more testing” and he will know about the job FOR SURE Saturday. Apparently I was also dreaming in Cinemascoop about the floor in the kitchen….. do not pass go, do not find linoleum. Much nicer subflooring and a different configuration in the kitchen, but no lino.

Dax dropped by last night with his friend Justin. I have no idea why. Katie smoked a cigarette and I cried into my biscotti dough. (No, not really. That would be unsanitary.)

Watched most of Gentlemen Prefer Blondes last night, and I am not alone in vastly preferring Jane Russell. Oh, the clothes, the clothes!!! We were so grossed out by the ad for Bus(t) Stop that we didn’t watch it.

My boss’s band is playing the same weekend as Potlatch. Suckage! Major diameter suckkkkage!

Finished **** You Jack and mailed it to my mother, including emailing her the midi file so she knows what tune to hum as she’s playing the somewhat devil may care lyrics. Two songs down, 98 to go. Sigh.

I should finish the Tapioca song so Yam and Dr. Filk can go promulgate it. There is a prophet, and there are acolytes.

Try to guess what I did to this copyrighted picture of Richard Seamans’. It is a B2, and it was taken at an airshow, and then I ditzed with it.

My floor! My floor
2006-02-01— Posted by: allegra

The boys from Edenvale Restoration (and, folks, major props to them all) are in my house doing the last of the flood restoration. It only took 11 weeks from flood to fabulous, and we only got nailed for a $500 deductible. Happy sigh.

Now we have to rip that godawful upstairs carpet up. I really really want to do that, it’s just gross.

democracy under a veil
2006-02-01— Posted by: allegra

Those reading this fore-noted non highlighted link who maintain the impression that the US is still a democracy have my sympathy, but I won’t have much trust in their judgment.

No moose picture?
2006-02-01— Posted by: allegra

I heard about a moose surfing on an ice floe, but there was NO PICTURE. WWAAAAHH.

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Born when atmospheric carbon was 316 PPM. Settled on MST country since 1997. Parent, grandparent.

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