insanity, the gift that keeps on giving

A couple of things got straightened out today and in consequence my mood’s considerably lighter.

If Jeff or I say in future that we ‘elsewhere wendeth’ you can pretty much be assured we’re either hitting the head or fixing to die. (It’s a Time Team reference.)

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did I die laughing reading this, ALMOST but not quite.

I’m starting to mail photocopy art and crafted paper to people, I’m obviously losing my mind.

I have started a long poem called The Dark Book; it’s a meditation on Moloch and it’s going to be really dark and ugly and written like a spell book or scriptures. It’s going to be at least thirty pages long, quite dense, possibly longer. I don’t need another project but it’s a really great place to put my anger about a certain show ending.

Tom’s coming home

How providential. Much labour from Peggy of course.

I have a master list of groceries and I just transferred six weeks of grocery lists over so the gaps were all filled in with … stuff that we eat in 2020 as opposed to the ramen and KD I was buying non stop 25 years ago….. Anyway, it was an interesting exercise, and I have to do it anyway, changing the list so there are no treats and fewer items which are now forbidden by the Congress of Kidneys, Liver, Pancreas and Digestive Tract.

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two letters off today, a 2 pager off to Tom and a 2 pager off to mOm. Almost mailed my bank card off too, but

Paul has called wanting to go for a walk. I already mailed things and I’m enjoying a little patch of sun warming this corner of the world up so I’m resisting, resisting.

I wonder when Buster will scoot his ass across the kitchen rugs, now they’re nice and clean….

saddened

Tom’s back in hospital.

Yesterday I made a vegetarian dinner, ran and put away three loads of laundry, wrote 2400 words on a fanfic that I said was going to get shorter, practiced and didn’t nap. This resulted in me going to bed so early that I had to set my alarm to ensure that I didn’t sleep through taking my pill.

William Gillis on twitter this am:

Fascists don’t see nature as motherly and cities as masculine. They see nature as masculine (“red in the tooth & claw”, a return to savagery when men were men, etc), and cities as feminine (a degenerate, passive, overly complex focus on talking & mentality rather than action).

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and now tea, Holy Crap cereal, and a little bit of an existential tremor as I contemplate how so many things can go wrong at once

not in my life, which remains delightfully quiet

two more days and I get to watch the Supernatural finale – I don’t know what to hope for and I’m staying as passive as I can about it. As I remarked to NorthernSparrow, we’ll always have fanfic.

lovely day yesterday

I got foodicles, I made flower rolls, I got more stamps, I mailed letters, I walked with Paul, I got poutine gifted me by Jeff, I got an EEG appointment, I hassled my financial dude for some money, sent my footbath over to Katie so she can spa her feet for her birthday, and now WATERSPOUTS THIS MORNING.

Also Tom is still recovering but some days are better than others and I send and sent my love to Peggy and himself.

Hoping to have another productive day today!!!

11642 but I am rewriting a scene so this number will drop as I edit

adulting like an adult

BITCH BETTER HAVE MY MONEY (warning, violence and nudity) asked for a drawdown two weeks ago, sweetly phoned them this morning BITCH BETTER HAVE MY MONEY and enquired as to where the drawdown was, since it certainly wasn’t in my account BITCH BETTER HAVE MY MONEY and after a grovelling apology it’s supposed to be there today.

Also, I shook down the EEG clinic for an appointment, another piece of adulting DEFTLY HANDLED.

Now I’m going to buy a glucose testing machine, figure out how much money I owe my roommate for running expenses over the last couple of months, go for a walk with Paul and pull some whole wheat flower rolls out of the oven, because I RULE

An accompaniment to ‘the sproing’

ImageJenny L Davis academic details

@ChickashaJenny – we currently follow each other on twitter but that may change, since I’m curating my list pretty much constantly and sometimes if I think I’ve been too greedy of an Indigenous person’s time I quit following them to stop the damage.
anyway, what the hell is a sproing?
Glad you asked. Sadly, this device is fictional, and part of the UPSUN universe, but oh how I wish it warn’t.

Text of the user guide:

All my relations.

In English, this device is called a sproing.

The sproing was made by sixers for Indigenous peoples to reclaim their stolen heritage from museums, businesses, collections and private homes.

There is technology in it which makes it demand to be used.

It will self-destruct or become inert if not used for its purpose, because it assumes that when it stops reclaiming Indigenous treasures that it is in the hands of colonial powers who wish to understand its secrets. We can’t say how it makes these decisions, just that we’ve seen it demonstrated.

When you’re done with it – may that day come soon – think of where to leave it. If you decide never to use it, you will still have to leave it somewhere.

If it self-destructs it may reach temperatures of 850 degrees C. Think of this object as a person who is a tool who is a bomb.

DO NOT LEAVE IT IN YOUR HOMES. You have been warned. The smoke causes lung and skin damage to human beings, plants and animals. Sitting it on dirt or stones with a metal box over it is best when it’s not being used.

It is wise to ensure that anyone who will be using the sproing speaks to it first. The sproing doesn’t have speech recognition, but it becomes used to certain people and is much less likely to behave strangely if it hears familiar voices. Speak to it before you pick it up.

Since it will open almost any door, it exists in opposition to capitalism and so it’s always dangerous for you to carry. Thieves, cops, the military, journalists, spies and sixer technology cultists all want this object. If you are not the right person to use it, give it to one of your people who is honest and fearless, and let them use it instead.

The sproing will open almost all key-locked doors and the fobbinator half of all doors managed with a key fob. If it doesn’t work, don’t make a second attempt. Second attempts may bring on the self-destruct, as the sproing assumes the person using it is without the necessary self-discipline to use it safely.

Please treat the sproing with honour and leave it in the sun, directly on the ground, during ceremony, to the extent you can. It will run longer if you do.

The sproing is capable of independent movement. It won’t happen often but they have been known to follow people they like for several hundred meters before they lose interest.

No visible record of the sproing  – of any kind – should be made, which is why there is no illustration in this document. Songs and ceremonies are OK.

Do not leave it close to bonfires, as there is more than one report of sproings being attracted to large fires. Under no circumstances try to pull it out of the fire; alert everyone and move away with your backs turned, and keep moving. Although it appears to be made of metal, it is non-magnetic and non-ferrous. If you are foolish enough to try to take it through a customs-enforced airport and you are asked what it is, it’s a paperweight.

Operation.

The side marked “S” is the sproing side. Place the “S” as close to the keyhole as possible and push gently. The sproing will ‘kick’ once, and extrude and push the key into the hole. You can still pull it out at this time and whatever is extended will retract.

Push again and the key will ‘halt in place’ or advise you of failure by vibrating four times. If it works, you won’t be able to remove the sproing until the door has been unlocked and locked again. Turn the sproing as if it was a key and open the door. Return to starting position to remove sproing.

Push three times rapidly if the sproing jams after you’ve returned it to the starting position; this triggers forced retraction.

The “F” side is the fobbinator side. Hold as if it was a fob next to the sensor and wait. If it doesn’t work, it will vibrate, hard, four times. Don’t try it again!

Do not use the sproing lightly or without a clear understanding of your responsibilities as you use it. It is normal for the sproing to change colour over time. This will take the appearance of bleaching or darkening from the original gunmetal colour. If you treat the sproing properly, within a short time it will be the colour of the soil of your territories.

Memorize these instructions and burn them.

I referred to a Trumpenista today as a ‘cognitive foundling’ and I’m particular pleased with that locution.

Quiet day yesterday

Ran dishes, made veggie/dairy pizza, put away clean laundry, worked a little on fanfic, practiced, talked to someone else on line about the cultural competence reader.

Still can’t believe destiel is canon: I still feel like the goddamned show is Lucy with a football and I’m Charlie Brown.

Today we’re going to feast on chicken sandwiches and poutine, since that’s the supper Jeff has planned for my birthday. So much salt and fat!!!!! nom. But it’s hard to be a Gritty fan without gravy. I’m going to be spectacularly well-behaved regarding everything else I eat today.

 

 

 

Letter to Lois finished

AFTER TWO YEARS I’m finally sending her the midwifery poster. All part of my “Clean everything out and get everything into a 10 x 10 x 10 foot cube!” plan.

Holy Crap cereal for breakfast. I’m not going to say this stuff leaves me in a state of ‘enteric rapture’ (Dunnett quote) but I’m having smooth moves, that’s for sure. I eat it with 5% milkfat greek yogurt and a scant teaspoon of maple syrup, and it is nom, although it is seedy stuff.

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This is … not accurate, but devilish diverting.

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I have no idea which anime this came from.

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This one came from GNOMES

Hold me to this

Never getting in Paul’s car again unless someone else is driving. I shall not provide details, but I got super screechy

It’s a shame really. Deer Lake Park was beautiful yesterday and I was shaking with rage by the time I got home.

I actually DREAMED about Misha Collins last night. He was in a supermarket being interviewed about his cookbook and said, “My husband and I – ” and then I woke up. He is married to a woman (who wrote a book about threesomes, hey a girl can dream) so this is just fanfic trying to run my life AGAIN.

I’M DYING UP IN HERE

The most recent supernatural episode was one of the most wildly and offensively insipid 45 minutes I’ve ever seen. I obviously missed something. Also, is Lucifer (in this show) really dead because if I never see Mark P.’s punchable snoot again it will be too soon.

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Manuscript is away

Many appreciative thanks to Jeff to conveying me to the Pest Office.

I had a headache for 4 days – not migraine – but it appears to have finally stopped, since it wasn’t there when I woke up this morning.

Happy Friday the 13th….

On the internet, the headline reads, Why is everybody so mean to Jerry from ‘Parks and Recreation’?

The rough treatment of Jerry Gergich is at odds with “Parks and Recreation’s” cheerful outlook, but every sitcom needs a punching bag.

And there you have it, why I loathe most sitcoms

Meg on Family Guy makes me wish Seth McFarlane hadn’t been hungover on 9/11

How to support an autistic person melting down.

progress

I have heard back from the cultural competence reader. I will be mailing the manuscript today or tomorrow.

Finished Queen’s Gambit and loved it. That will get a rewatch sooner rather than later I imagine.

I have received some more addresses from family members. I’m working on some kind of master plan for our diet.

Vegetarian whole wheat pizza again with soy cheese. I honestly cannot tell the difference.

I’ve heard about a show called Trickster; the Dunnetteers quite like it so I want to give it a try.

Wall Street is apparently telling Trump to give it up. LOL

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