yes tomorrow I start a new job, training for a while and then I’ll be called back when coworker goes on mat leave.

I’m really happy about it, and also super nervous. It’s an hour long commute but a) against the traffic which means I can SIT and b) I think I’ve figured a route that doesn’t need the skytrain, which will keep the cost down, since avoiding skytrain has a cheaper fare. Seriously considering taking the folding chair with me if I have to stand more than once the first full week.

My symptoms were really bad yesterday morning, and then cleared for the rest of the day. Right now all I’ve got is the cramping feeling in the back of my tongue and it’s a bit hard to swallow.

I feel like such a bad grandma; I got a text to sit Alex while Katie napped and slept through it…..

Paul is 69

Like what the hell, dude?

Anyway, he took the four of us (less Alex, more on that later) to the Wet Spot in New West, and I had a Hot Chicken Spot salad which was very fresh and tasty, and a choc milkshake, Keith had a burger, Katie had spag and meatballs, and Paul had the quinoa salad. We talked and laughed and I told Paul we were Kids With Wrinkles when he said “Am I that old??? I’m 22!”

Prior to this I accompanied Katie to drop off Alex in Langley at his dad’s. ON THE WAY THERE we saw Alex’s youngest uncle hard by Surrey centre with a shopping cart full of crap and the memorably loose bodily configuration that accompanies being about 2 hours post heroin fix. It was absolutely horrifying and cringingly sad as we drove by. I felt sick, and Katie said flatly that she doesn’t give him 18 months.  Given how much fentanyl and carfentanyl is in Vancouver area heroin right now that disadvantaged young man will not likely make old bones and yes, he’s been in treatment, and he’s even been a couple months clean in the last year, although detoxing in jail is hardly ideal.

His mother just lost her romantic partner to liver disease; she’s having a rough go and I pray her son gets clean and stays that way.

Minutes after that sobering sight we’re dropping Alex off. Now constant readers will recollect that Alex doesn’t always say goodbye, or have any interest in hugging or kissing me. It’s always a bonus. I never demand, because a good grandma understands the sensory issues of her grandkids.

WELL WHAT A FUCKING PAYOUT. I feel like virtue rewarded this am.

He kissed his mama good bye and then he got this MISCHIEVOUS look on his face and announced, loudly, twice, that he WAS GOING TO HUG AND KISS GIGI GOODBYE

and he did, with an extremely cute flourish.

as we drove away Katie and I were HOWLING because he did it deliberately to annoy his dad and fuck I’m still laughing and feeling unreasonably pleased about it. Katie’s attitude is that if Alex is learning his father’s techniques for dragging people, his dad being the only one he uses them on is rich beyond compare. Apple rolls downhill from tree; QED.

It needs only be added that he’s been served, and at some point Katie breaking herself to accommodate Alex staying emotionally close to his father is going to pay off in court, because she’s not the one the cops got called on this past week.

Everything’s fine, but pounding on the door of your ex’s house for twenty minutes while screaming that you just want to see your son is just so bloody mature don’t you think

and what do you think Alex was saying inside while this was happening?

“Why doesn’t Daddy just go away?”

Yeah, harsh lessons all around.

He did see his dad, briefly; Katie’s not an asshole. But he wouldn’t let it go, now, would he. Reap what you sow and blame others.



side comment on another subject… I was collecting seeds this morning for a long term project and found something out about the fresh seed pods which amazed and moved me. Each tiny little seed is attached to a little umbilicus, which when the seed pod is fresh means when you harvest them, the red pigment in the moist pod makes them look like they’re bleeding from getting their cord cut. I really felt the awe of the ancestors in that moment; how everything in nature informs and enriches all of human life.

Deimos and other things

I really really like Deimos, but BUSTER HATES HIM so we’re trying to get them together. Without claws.

Yesterday afternoon went to the pool to hang with Katie and Alex. It was lovely and I NEEDED that soak and talk and stuff.

Then all three of us played in the toddler pool. We played a game trying to throw three balls in the air so they all smashed together at the same time. I got smashed in the face and after my shock I couldn’t stop laughing.

I even hung up all my towels as soon as I got home.

Still do not have a date for my head and neck MRI.


Lovely seeing kids

Saw Katie yesterday for breakfast and a mini ship, and Keith wandered by later. I hope very much to see Alex later. Mike’s dropping by around 5 – I don’t know whether we’re heading out for dinner or hanging out here or what.

I keep trying to post pics from the camera but it appears something isn’t working quite right. I’m still working on it.

First pass edit of HS is now complete. A re-ordering of the chapters and some new material is required for completion, but I am sanguine I should have this done sometime in the next two months.

I am quite energized… it feels like November, my most productive month creatively, has come early.



He’s a three year old cat that lives five minutes from here and his current humans want to swap him. They cite the following reasons: He wants to be AOUTSAIDE NAOW. all the time. They keep having to herd him back into the house. He is jealous of the new baby.  Bounce never was (OH A NEW NAP TIME COMPANION SNORE) but some cats hate the not having all the skritches.

Please note the Greek name. mOm…. you are noting, are you not? A good omen. I won’t post pictures yet. He’s black and white with green eyes. Not the best looking cat but Margot wasn’t a cover girl either.

Jeff and I will go acquaint ourselves with him on Monday. We have a list of questions.

Also, I have a phone interview for a job very similar to the last ‘good’ job I had on Monday. I am not convinced I’ll even be called in for a physical interview so I remain undisturbed and will likely start that other job in November just like expected. I will get out my resume and prep though, it’s a chance.

Reach for the Sky

watched it with Paul and Jeff.. so dated but also in some ways very fresh. Kenneth More is such a cutie SUCH A BRITISH PUNIM ma lord.

Walked down at the Quay today and I’ll tell you I was much cheered to see a Global Artisanal Chocolate pop up store in there. There was this 72 percent cacao dark chocolate and they’re claiming the cocao pods are hauled down a mountain on muleback. It is UNUSUALLY GOOD. They tell you to suck and not to chew, and it was a lot like a religious experience. I got a milk chocolate bar and hopefully the last bar is hidden. I could have spent that much on steak, Calice


feeling better

2800 words of fanfic, very sweet and slow… set in Vancouver, just for a change.

Also continuing to edit HS. Work progresses on that as well! two chapters today already.

I wonder if Alex will be well enough to go to his first swimming lesson tomorrow! I hope to attend and take video like the doting old bat I am. Both of the kids have been so sweet to me, I’m filled with happiness just thinking about them. Also, four days in a row of fantastic air quality and son of a bitch I feel like a human being again, quelle surprise.

boring food

treating my liver right means not eating interesting food so I’m feeling kinda low

I really want to complain about how sad I am about stuff that I can’t control and probably has nothing to do with me, but I’m going to be an adult and mention an accomplishment instead: that SOTW editing has been handed over to Jeff. On to Hair Sinister (I didn’t give myself a break, went straight into editing.)

I hope to see Alex today.

It was absolutely lovely seeing the kids for breakfast yesterday (I had something reasonably healthy sigh), even if I had to start off by re-apologizing to Keith for thinking the worst when his new phone disconnected a call. (I picked up Paul’s call while he was driving, the call disconnected; on my end it sounded like Keith heard my voice and then hung up in disgust WHICH IS NOT WHAT HAPPENED.)  moving right along.

Today I pay bills and do laundry and thank our Blessed Elder God that I didn’t have to travel to Swartz Bay on a Friday when 4 ferries were cancelled.




Lovely to visit the fOlks – finally handed off something almost like a final version of SOTW to mOm so she can print it out. Alex was really active and for the most part (brief morning snuggles o joy) pretty good tempered. He doesn’t possess his soul in patience when we’re in the ferry lineup though.


Loading delay because somebody forgot to go back to their vehicle ↓ downvote.

Alex sure loves the Cars franchise.  He’s shown here blurred because he basically never stops moving, and that’s actually someone else’s Paw Patrol toy.


deer plus Alex plus Katie at Majestic Park