Front Half October 2006

Sick, sick, sick
2006-10-15— Posted by: allegra

http://www.devilducky.com/media/29431/

A comic sketch entitled “Waiters Who are Nauseated by Food”.

CRTC
2006-10-15— Posted by: allegra

I received an interesting Email from Cousin Gerald today, a forward from a buddy of his who’s very cheesed about a CRTC decision regarding the telcos. If I understand this all correctly, the Canadian telcos have raised about 650 million bucks from overcharging for local service since 2002. They were supposed to rebate us, like, the consumers, but they appealed to the CRTC to apply the overcharge to “building broadband capacity”.

Now, I am a big fan of broadband capacity, and if I believed more than 80% of the money was actually going to be spent in that fashion, I’d grumble but roll over and say “Make it snappy”.

Before I looked at the CRTC decision, I was thinking that I don’t believe a goddamned thing the telcos tell me, and I don’t think that Canadian Government Agencies should be quite so cheerful when they’re letting thieves keep their spoils on the promise that they’ll be spending it for the good of humanity. After, I had a different feeling. Here’s the CRTC decision, which comes close to being in English. http://www.crtc.gc.ca/archive/ENG/Decisions/2006/dt2006-9.htm

So I guess the upshot is that the CRTC thinks the consumers should get it back, and now we’re arguing about the best way to do it. If I was the benevolent dictator of Canada, I would use it to underwrite broadband access in remote areas and to disabled people, but that just shows what a socialist fluffy headed sap I am. Why not spend it on wealth creation? Who gives a shit if First Nations and disabled people have broadband? Anyway, if you have any interest in the disposition of a pile of money so big it would even make Bill Gates, George Soros and Warren Buffett pay attention, google CRTC and rate cap and Disposition of funds in the deferral accounts, which is what the decision is called. You can also visit http://www.piac.ca (which is a consumer group of some stripe or other) for more links.

News Flash
2006-10-15— Posted by: allegra

Paul’s going to church.

I’m staying home to do laundry.

enough sleep
2006-10-14— Posted by: allegra

Boy, did I get enough sleep. I slept until 1:52 this afternoon, and yes, I am feeling somewhat poorly, which might account for my long rest.

I saw Body Worlds 3 last night with Brooke. She has forgiven me my ticketing meshugas so I will hurriedly skip on to: Yes, it was great, if you’re not too squeamish see it.

The water heater died – the damned thing was only five years old – and Dave the Plumber replaced it. Paul is even now tying the new one back onto the frame of the house so it doesn’t fall down during an earthquake.

The first thing I did when I got up was realize that I was an hour late for the Spit, so I threw on my clothes and flew out the door to the Thirsty Duck, where Jan, Susanne, Dee, Ingrid and myself quaffed bevvies and had a late lunch and then drifted by Renaissance Books. I bought Sex with Kings (a history of European court mistresses which I’ve already finished as it was the definition of a quick read) and Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman for Keith – it will be waiting for him on his bed when he gets home. Ingrid was amazed to learn that Vancouver has a Sci Fi convention…. I told her it’s pretty much a media and gaming con, but the filk track is pretty good these days, snicker.

Anyway the only other thing I’ve done today is yawn and sneeze and eat dinner, and frankly, I’m just as happy about that. I am feeling a weird trembly exhaustion which is just crying out for more unconsciousness.

My sleep was full of nightmares… maybe going back to sleep isn’t such a good idea.

You’ve gotta be kidding me
2006-10-13— Posted by: allegra

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=6248833

and for my flying friends
2006-10-13— Posted by: allegra

http://www.ornithopter.ca/MediaGallery/Videos/index_e.html

And the Bible doesn’t say a THING about polyandry
2006-10-13— Posted by: allegra

http://www.godlessgeeks.com/LINKS/BiblicalMarriage.htm

Read and giggle. The rest of the site is plenty amusing.

Just in time for the apocalypse
2006-10-13— Posted by: allegra

http://www.MERKINWORLD.com/

…. and you should thank your lucky stars I’m not posting a pic. NO I don’t want one for Christmas (although if you do, get me the rainbow). YES I think 150 quid is a bit much for some fluffy polyester. Hm. I feel a prank comin’ on.

Asteroid animation
2006-10-13— Posted by: allegra

http://www.umich.edu/news/Vid/kw4.mov

Okay, this is REALLY COOL. The animation is of the KW4 binary asteroid; 1 second is 8 hours and they show 4 different angles. These are not solid masses; they are rapidly spinning collections of space junk; if you tried to land on one you’d be sorry.

So these folks live in Anchorage
2006-10-13— Posted by: allegra

Either these folks are starting a zoo, or they have animal control problems. To me, the scariest thing about this picture is not that there are four bears in it, but that you CAN’T SEE THE FIFTH BEAR, which will be a black bear sow. How the HELL she ended up with four cubs completely amazes me.

Music of the Domestic Goddesses
2006-10-13— Posted by: allegra

http://www.makezine.com/blog/archive/2006/10/vacuum_cleaner.html?CMP=OTC-0D6B48984890

Great pic of musical vacuum cleaners…

Katie said she’d come home and didn’t. Tiresome, but I pushed the door of her room open and pretended I was Hitler looking at Poland.

Keith made bread after coming home from karate; I didn’t know because I forced myself off the computer at 9:34 at went to bed, and now I have actually had enough sleep, which amazes me.

Lexi visited briefly earlier this week, and told the kind of anecdote you hear maybe once a year. Since she doesn’t blog and I can’t repeat it – alas, it is not my story to tell – I’m feeling somewhat crabby, but I will say this…. if the End of the World as We Know It comes along anytime soon, I want Rob and Lexi in MY corner. And of course anybody who knows them feels much the same way…

I’m very much looking forward to the weekend. There’s gonna be a Spit! (See previous blogs for what is a Spit). Maybe I’ll finally get Dunnetteer Jan’s detective books back to her, although given how many books are parked next to my bed right now that seems like a hard prospect. I have finished Joanna Russ’ On Strike Against God, which, if I parse it correctly, she wrote at one sitting during a manic episode triggered by the loss of a lover. There are some really bad typos in it, but also some really great stuff, especially the quotes at the end.

There is an interesting link between the local Spitters and VCon; Academie Duello, which does weapons demos at VCon pretty much every year now, and which held a Dunnett Reenactment this past spring (god, it was amazing!) actually approached some Spitters at VCon and said something along the lines of “That was fun, we should do that again.” Yee haw. Maybe they could reenact the fight between Niccolo and Simon in The Unicorn Hunt (when two guys try to kill each other with large or sharp hot metal items) or the fight in Queen’s Play between Lymond and Robin Stewart, in which Robin does everything wrong and Lymond doesn’t to kill him anyway because he’s trying to make a point. I realize that the only person who reads my blog who will get any of this is the Empress of Brookealonia, but that’s okay.

I’m yawning so hard my jaw is cracking, so I think I’ll go get me some coffee.

A bad bad review
2006-10-12— Posted by: allegra

http://jameswolcott.com/archives/2006/10/ratfink_to_rele.php

This man’s command of invective needs to be admired, so admire it already.

OMG it’s a Marketing thing, you wouldn’t understand
2006-10-12— Posted by: allegra

http://www.consumerist.com/consumer/sure/sure-deodorant-is-the-same-as-secret-206620.php

OMG hey pOp
2006-10-12— Posted by: allegra

www.oscarbrand.com

This will mean nothing to most of my readers, but if I told you that you can now buy a package set of the WWII songs for $30 US what would that do for you? I grew up with these songs. They are part of my sonic landscape.

INTERRUPTION BASED MARKETING
2006-10-12— Posted by: allegra

http://soundprinciples.com/ad-verse/2006/01/direct-marketing-science-of.html

The vilification must stop
2006-10-12— Posted by: allegra

http://www.anncoulterisbrainless.com/

Now, in this very blog I have accused Ann Coulter of having a tapeworm, (or was it Michelle Malkin? all Repulsigans look alike to me…) and I’ve told her that I would bake her a pie, because she’s so very slender. So I am definitely in the ‘hater’ category. But I have never, no never, committed the gross calumny of accusing her of being brainless. She isn’t brainless! She’s just differently abled in the truth department. There’s a BIG difference.

Sample Coulter quote: “I have to say I’m all for public flogging.” — MSNBC 3/22/97

Sample Allegra reaction. “Kinky! Girl, you’ll be stampeding cattle through the Vatican next!”

Dr. Porco strikes again
2006-10-11— Posted by: allegra

Check out the wavy rings of Saturn….

enough sleep
2006-10-11— Posted by: allegra

Nothing’s happening to me; I’m devoid of thought. It’s nice and peaceful here right now.

Keep those cards and moose pictures coming
2006-10-10— Posted by: allegra

This moose on the highway (a beautiful Nancy White song by that name is echooooing in my heeeead right now) was captured in NFLD. What a rack!

It’s been bally ages since I posted a moose picture
2006-10-10— Posted by: allegra

From Aftenposten – the legendary Sp�kelsemoose (if this doesn’t show properly, that weird symbol should be an o with a forward slash through it).

Happy sigh
2006-10-10— Posted by: allegra

We had a wonderful meal at Tom and Peggy’s last night – I don’t mind roast turkey two days running! And I was able to recycle the parsnips, so there.

Paul and I are still feeling a warm glow from our very happy and successful Thanksgiving dinner, and we did the bike/walk/run thing at Cariboo this morning so the blood is actually circulating!

Shortbus
2006-10-10— Posted by: allegra

Go see it. I really enjoyed it, even though it made me really uncomfortable in spots. I laughed really hard and I was crying at the end, so I guess it hit the “I laughed, I cried, it became a part of me” spot.

Ambivalence and creativity
2006-10-09— Posted by: allegra

http://uwnews.washington.edu/ni/article.asp?articleID=27195

4307
2006-10-09— Posted by: allegra

4307 is the sales code for longan – we have some in the house at the moment which are being scarfed down by Carly.

We had a simply fabulous evening. After I cooked pretty much all day we sat down around 6:15 and scarfed green beans, fresh turkey with two kinds gravy (one with mushrooms, the drippings gravy definitely without mushrooms), new potatoes, two kinds salad (green and cucumber/tomato), cranberry sauce, home made stuffing, corn on the cob, parsnips that nobody ate because I didn’t put them out, home made beer, home made perry, tea, coffee, passionfruit raspberry sorbet, Omani butter cookies and home made hazelnut torte with cream personally flagellated by Paul.

Oh, and Mike, Katie and Nita shared a coconut rum shot at the end of it all…

The only picture Jim got of me I’m glaring at the camera so hard it’s amazing it didn’t fly out of his hand. I’m posting a pic of the Carly and the Nita instead, everybody would rather look at them.

I’d list the participants, but let’s just say that we had to buy another table to seat them all, and that when I woke up this morning I had a new program on my computer. (They asked permission first).

I crashed out about the time that the Buffy musical episode came on, and was simply amazed when Paul, who was still suffering from the depredations to his feet from the Science World show, joined me shortly thereafter. It’s wonderul to have guests you can abandon like that, but man, we were bagged.

For everybody else doing Canuckistani Thanksgiving today, have a lovely time!

He’s missing a golden opportunity
2006-10-08— Posted by: allegra

http://www.azcentral.com/offbeat/articles/1005wsj-japan-blog05-ON.html

Painting rings on Jabba’s back.
2006-10-08— Posted by: allegra

So many happy, and a couple of unhappy, things to report. Unhappy first. My friend is still in the psych ward. I really hope she gets better soon; this is being very hard on her and the people who love her, so I light multiple candles for her and her family.

On a far less serious note, my hazelnut torte collapsed when I took it out of the oven, but I don’t think I’m going to have any trouble getting the folks to eat something that has the best part of a dozen eggs, a cup of sugar and a half pound of ground hazelnuts in it. Simple recipe, hunh? It will be yummy no matter what the hell it looks like. Paul has volunteered to get whipped cream. The good old heart attack circle is complete…

I took a good brisk walk this morning before the sun came up and feel reasonably sanguine about today’s festive meal.

Paul, Jim, Carly and Nita saw the Body Show at Science World last night. I stayed home, and now I wish I hadn’t because they say there’s NO WAY to see the show in two hours; you need four at minimum and you can’t do it when you start at 7 pm and it closes two hours later… So I guess I should go and see it with Katie or Keith or both some afternoon when it’s not so jammed. It was a good experience buying tix on line from Science World, and I recommend doing that if you’re going. The folks were one and all blown away by the exhibit, and can’t recommend it highly enough, and say that the ticket price is very reasonable for what you get.

Keith has finally written down the days he’s supposed to take off for Orycon, so hopefully we are now all free to go to Portland in mid-November.

Dr. Filk is much enjoying V-Con and has brought me the On Spec that Casey had a story published in. I am going to wait for the houseguest uproar (that’s GOOD uproar, they do dishes!) to die down a bit before I read it, but it looks intriguing.

Katie and Carly burst out laughing when they saw each other this morning (for the first time in AGES); they were dressed almost identically in hoodies and pants and they were in the wonderful teenaged phrase “scrubbed out” which basically means that they were glamour pusses by comparison with the rest of us feeble elderly types. It was a most amusing fambly moment.

Keith continues to amuse and amaze. His most recent quote is a direct hit on George Lucas (a Jabba sized target these days), which he came up with upon learning that George has seen and liked Serenity and is choked that Firefly was cancelled. Keith is hoping that George, who’s richer than God, will tell Joss, “Joss, my flabby old heart and now quiescent sack are not up to another epic production – here’s some cash towards a full season of Firefly.” Lie down when you’re dreaming there, boy.

Has anybody else seen the Family Circus parody which takes a Family Circus cartoon and inserts a Nietsche quote? Okay, I found it funny, I’ll shut up now. Alluva sudden I can hear the Dandy Warhols winding up in the background!!! (they have a song called Nietsche, just in case you were wondering.)

Flabby old heart and now quiescent sack? I’m still howling about that one.

A little bird sent me this
2006-10-07— Posted by: allegra

http://journals.democraticunderground.com/Skinner/80

Maybe I’m really sick to be amused by somebody making fun of Katherine Harris, but don’t I have a right to be sick?

Laugh, I thought I’d die
2006-10-07— Posted by: allegra

http://motionographer.com/media/battle_adbands-w.mov

If you didn’t grow up in the 70’s don’t bother with this movie but if you did you’ll find it quite amusing. Essentially a bunch of VERY FAMILIAR album covers come to life and, well, there’s an exchange of gunfire, and then – aw watch it anyway, it’s pretty funny.

enough sleep
2006-10-07— Posted by: allegra

Sacrifice Those Animals

no trespassing
2006-10-06— Posted by: allegra

Mike McG took this in Thailand….

Do not google this!!!
2006-10-06— Posted by: allegra

Whatever you do, DO NOT google image Brazilian eye popper. You WILL be sorry.

Reading
2006-10-06— Posted by: allegra

Finished the Edgar Award Winning “New Orleans Mourning” last night. I LOVE the heroine, Skip Langdon, and her boyfriend Steve makes me drool. Must… find…. more….

Also finished the last hour of Good Night and Good Luck, which is a bloody awesome movie.

I am going into hibernation mode, so I’m planning a nice long walk sometime this weekend to try and counteract this.

I’m having a small gathering on Sunday night – the trad turkey – what can I say, I’m the world’s most conventional oddball.

My brother sent me a youtube link that made me cry. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4 if you have any interest.

I’m still enjoying the sensation of how tidy the yard is when I pull up. Thanks Keith and Paul.

Katie ACTUALLY CALLED at midnight to say she wasn’t coming home last night. This represents progress, let’s celebrate. Doubles all round.

Overheard at the call center
2006-10-05— Posted by: allegra

Once again, I must INSIST that this didn’t happen at my company.

CS Agent: So… That takes care of your billing issue… Are you looking for a cell phone?

Customer: (starting to rant) Cell phone… I do not need any stinking cell phone… If you sell me a cell phone you might as well give someone a hammer to hit me on the side of the head. That way, I will be just as retarded as the rest of those idiots.

CS Agent: (without missing a beat) That may be true sir, but fortunately for you, I do not sell hammers.

Customer: What? (long pause)… You are a funny guy…

Click!

Hey, ya heard it here first
2006-10-05— Posted by: allegra

Out of Jordan comes the bloggy, bloggy news that by the 17th of October (end of Ramadan) there will be a massive attack on North America, and all Muslims are advised to leave. The comments posted at the end of the blog encompass such sentiments as, “Hey, chuckles! Where do you want us to go? Iran? Afghanistan? Sa’udi Arabia? Send me the plane fare and we’ll talk!”

I am no longer worried about the end of the world. I’ve read the latest Scienterrific American, and when the CO2 PPM goes over 900, we’ll all die from the Hydrogen Sulphide gas that will be produced when the chemocline in the ocean shifts to the surface. Read the article and be prepared to be scared out of your shorts.

It’s fall
2006-10-05— Posted by: allegra

I was walking into work yesterday and a 20 inch across maple leaf fell into my path. I put it over my desk yesterday. People laugh when they see it, it’s so big.

Growing up
2006-10-05— Posted by: allegra

As I contemplate the arrival of my 50th birthday, which is taking shape against an eldritch, relentlessly backlit mist, and it only a year and a bit away, I must force myself to pause and consider the lives of my elders. For this year, they will, inshallah, celebrate 50 years of married life. I would call it bliss except it would be a damned lie, one which my parents would vigorously attack. “Yup,” they’d say, “We had a pretty good time, but I wouldn’t call it bliss. Especially when I think of this past month of hacking up my lungs & maintaining a furious schedule while trapped in my house.”

pOp, there’s THE WORLD’S MOST BORING WIKIPEDIA ARTICLE on Greenwood. I looked at it and ached with the desire to scan and post your stories. pOp’s Exploding Bedtime Stories. I can see the button now, edged in blue… There’s the story about how two of the four engines quit on takeoff when you were at full fuel and had many pounds of live munitions on board. Oh, and there’s the arctic survival training story, which features a dog running into your sleeping quarters to take a simply grisly dump; the story of searching for a lost guy who had no survival gear and put stale gas in his airplane prior to take off; and several other memorable and icy anecdotes besides; in other news, seagull guts; the man they called “Microswitch”, who nearly bled to death from a routine injection when they broke the needle off in his arm. Ah yes, these and many other stories enlivened my children’s childhood. I enjoyed reading them a LOT, and hammily.

Then I contemplate my grandmother, whose trek through her nineties continues to be full of adventure and gadding about, which is exactly what a woman her age SHOULD have on her agenda if she feels like it.

Well, I want to talk about my mother too, but I just can’t do it. I’ve backspaced over three sets of paeans to her ineffible Mummy-ness, but they all would have made Hallmark Cards disappear in a bloody shower of pancreatic implosions.

Keith is unhappy; the latest Strangers in Paradise is late. Katie is working. Paul is working.

Life is purty good right now, although not because my darlings are out earning their bread… Oh, look, Keith just fired up Good Night and Good Luck.

Missed a pic
2006-10-04— Posted by: allegra

Earlier I mentioned something I scanged from Carryabigsticker.com … here it is.

Moving right along
2006-10-04— Posted by: allegra

I am trying to intuit what Katie’s school fees are this morning; I have emails from the school saying pay up but there’s nothing to indicate what the Viking tax is to keep Katie in school. Yes I know they just declared school fees illegal.

Her boyfriend is trying to pre-emptively break up with her so he can walk away having dumped her. Young love! Katie doesn’t even appear upset about it.

Keith and I watched I Dood It last night. I don’t know what to say about this movie except that it has some of the wildest stuff imaginable in it with interminably long spells of not much happening. The song by the Jimmy Dorsey band and the Eleanor Powell rope dance at the beginning was enough to make my eyes pop out. Anyway, it stars Red Skelton and guests Lena Horne and Butterfly McQueen and the INCOMPARABLE Hazel Scott – her guest bit had my jaw on the floor – what an A MA ZING ivory tickler she was. (Dr. Filk wandered in just before that started and HE was pretty gobsmacked too). Oh, and there’s one piece of physical comedy (Red Skelton trying to get a passed out Eleanor Powell, who appears to be shapely string stuffed into a wedding dress, from the floor to a bed) that was so funny I ran out of air.

If I appear cheerful at the moment, it’s partly because I have a happy secret! I will tell you if you ask me nice, but I can’t post it publicly.

From carryabigsticker.com
2006-10-03— Posted by: allegra

Scanged from carryabigsticker.com. Go there, very funny fridge magnets.

flippin’ out
2006-10-03— Posted by: allegra

It’s been ages since I posted a picture of a black comedian dressed up as a woman. In point of fact, I think this is a first. Didn’t he have great legs? Remember Geraldine’s boyfriend’s name? (Killer, in case you were wondering.) I used to LOVE the Flip Wilson show.

enough sleep
2006-10-03— Posted by: allegra

www.englishrussia.com

I found some truly bizarre videos here (Orthodox Jews making Russian emigres drink until they puke? – no I didn’t watch it, the description in the comments was good enough for me) as well as some wonderful Rooslish. If you find the cat picture, enjoy; they are claiming that the facial expression on the cat is not photoshopped but I have my doubts. And if the facial expression on that cat is truly natural, I for one would not want to live with such a creature. They also have a dodge for shipping stuff to Russia which made me smile.

Katie didn’t come home last night and didn’t phone, but I guess we know where she is.

I finished John Barnes’ A Million Open Doors (I heart Giraut) this morning and watched Falling Down last night. Time to do dishes and get ready… Paul is just coming off shift now.

Duly noted
2006-10-02— Posted by: allegra

It takes a LONG TIME to roast and shell 10 pounds of hazelnuts if you are shelling them by hand. On the other hand, when people walk into your house, they are very impressed by the delightful blast of hazelnut scented air.

Boys and girls come out to play
2006-10-01— Posted by: allegra

Maybe men and women aren’t so different after all.

http://www.mcgill.ca/newsroom/news/?ItemID=22044

Harrisand Sculptures
2006-10-01— Posted by: allegra

Here’s a detail of the previous sculpture.

Harrisand Sculptures
2006-10-01— Posted by: allegra

This sculpture won the People’s Choice award. I can’t remember the name of it except that Dreams was part of the title.

Harrisand Sculptures
2006-10-01— Posted by: allegra

Another angle of the giraffe family.

Harrisand Sculptures
2006-10-01— Posted by: allegra

This is part of a larger tableau of the Cirque du Sand. I found the rest of the tableau uglier than a ruptured python, so I lay down on the sand and shot this, and I’m quite pleased with it. This one is for Vampire Mama, who really has a thing for giraffes. The top of the mother’s head was at least 8 feet above ground level, and this sculpture has been up since Labour Day, so you can get an idea for just how stable and amazing these sculptures are.

This one’s for Lexi
2006-10-01— Posted by: allegra

I can’t remember taking this, so I’ll assume Paul took it. This one’s for Lexi. The rest of the tableau was a bunch of dwarven and dragon extras sitting around bored out of their minds while this dude set up the shot. Very very funny.

Harrisand Sculptures
2006-10-01— Posted by: allegra

Here’s the same pic except shrunk down so you can see most of it.

More Harrisand
2006-10-01— Posted by: allegra

Detail, taken by Paul, of the Mexican entry.

Harrisand Sculptures
2006-10-01— Posted by: allegra

So we went to Harrison yesterday, and I didn’t hurt my back to nearly the extent I was afeared to, and Paul and I took some wonderful pics. This is a detail from a sculpture entitled, Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil. The little metal spikes coming out the top are to prevent trickster corvids from landing on the sculptures. It’s kinda Halloweeny, and it’s clicked over the beginning of October, so I figure I can get away with it.

That’s me Mum
2006-10-01— Posted by: allegra

When I am that age, I want to be just like her. Happy sigh.

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Allegra

Born when atmospheric carbon was 316 PPM. Settled on MST country since 1997. Parent, grandparent.

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