Moose and suchlike

pomo moose
2005-03-17— Posted by: allegra

Man, it’s been ages since I posted a pic of a moose. This moose is from Sweden, and when he’s not suicidal, he’s self-referential.

I hear the Swedish parks people hate German tourists. Germans apparently can’t see that sign without feeling compelled to steal it… which means the mooses have nowhere to scratch themselves, and the government has to be replacing hundreds a year.

St. Patricks Day
2005-03-17— Posted by: allegra

I’m gonna paint myself green and go to work. Ackshully, it’s too chilly.

I light a candle for all the people who are getting jerked around by immigration right now. I light a candle for all the people who are being separated from their favourite activity due to illness.

I am making biscotti again, it seems to be a mental health issue. This time I added enough salt and the dough seems somehow better, and as I commented to Rob of Nine on the bus last night, “and I *did* toast the nuts.”

I am thinking this will be a superlative batch, rather than the last batch which was just very good. I know, I know, most people greet my biscotti with screeches of delight, no matter their condition, but after almost ten years I’m a bit of a weenie about these things.

I should take a pic of a biscotti and post it. Yeah like I don’t have enough things on my list of things to do.

Last night I dreamed I went purse shopping in a city that was entirely a mall, and the cheapest purse that I found, that I liked, which turned out to have a tesseract in it, was 90 bucks on sale from a thousand. I reached into the purse and it promptly got much bigger. Now I know, and the people who’ve seen it with me know, that that’s because I watched ‘delivery’ a couple of days ago. I have to tell you that is right up there along with Django Reinhardt and Stephane Grapelli doing a 30’s style music video and a number of other things in the top ten of neat crud I’ve found on the internet for free. Anyway, the link to the 8 minute long “delivery” is on Screenhead.com. Try not to step in anything on the way by.

Anyway, I put the tesseract purse down, thinking “Ya know, in every story I’ve ever read this kinda thing NEVER turns out well, although I will be whining about how cheap it was for a year” and then all of a sudden I’m at the finish line of a snowmobile competition, standing next to a woman on a pay phone, who’s addressing an unknown person in chiding tones, “If you want more beer, you’re just going to have to put your skis on and come down here and get it.” I step away from the pay phone, thinking, “Well, that was weird” and then a bunch of park rangers haul a bunch of drunken teens and pre teens (all boys) out of the bush and start assigning them marks on how beautifully they puke. Then I woke up, may St Patrick and St Bridget ever protect me.

So there was a lot of drunkeness in my dreams last night…. I can only assume I was channeling the drinking going on in other time zones. Like England, where my server is….

I send you all a big hug and hope you have a lovely day. Must go cut biscotti now.

bahamastammy
2005-03-17— Posted by: allegra

I esPESHially like the dragon lady nails. From my buddy Tammy who recently returned from da Bahamas.

graupel
2005-03-17— Posted by: allegra

It graupelled at work today and I ran out in it. It’s my favourite kind of hail, and we usually get it at least once a year, in March, here in Vancouver. Google it if you want to learn more. I first ran into graupel in Montreal, on the day when everything fell out of the sky in a four hour period (rain, several kinds snow, sleet, freezing rain, graupel, hail – including thunder and lightning – and let’s just say it was the single most interesting day, meteorologically speaking, I’ve ever lived through.)

Tiger trap

bill vaccaro took this picture
2005-03-16— Posted by: allegra

scanged from Gaper’s Block. I find this pic deeply disturbing.

it’s raining!
2005-03-16— Posted by: allegra

This means that all the tree pollen has been reduced to the point where most of us can breathe again. Yippee! Paul continuing to feel much better.

enough sleep
2005-03-16— Posted by: allegra

Katie blew off her goddamned art class, the little weinie.

The reason for this post is the pic, which shows a Sumatran tiger attempting to eat a camera … a remotely operated camera, she hastens to add…. Man I didn’t think I’d see a tiger’s uvula before I went to bed tonight, but there it is, big and pink and cartoon like.

Too cheerful

too cheerful
2005-03-15— Posted by: allegra

Asian banks offload their greenbacks

By Josh Gordon, Economics correspondent (Canberra)

The Age (Melbourne, Australia)

http://www.theage.com.au/

March 12, 2005

http://www.theage.com.au/news/Business/Asian-banks-offload-their-greenbacks/2005/03/11/1110417685655.html?oneclick=true#

reprinted from copvcia.com

The US dollar's status as the world's main reserve currency is under threat as Asian banks back away from the superpower's ballooning twin deficits.

Over the past three years, central banks in the region have been scaling back their holdings of US dollars amid jitters about the United States' ever-expanding current account and budget deficits, which collectively soaked up at least $US1000 billion ($A1265 billion) of foreign currency last year.

A report by the Bank for International Settlements has estimated that the share of deposits held in US currency by Asian banks dropped to 67 per cent in the September quarter of 2004, from about 81 per cent of total deposits three years earlier.

The figures suggest that a dramatic but not widely publicised regional shift away from the US dollar is under way.

They follow a warning from Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi that the Japanese central bank should consider diversifying out of US dollars. Korea expressed similar sentiments last month.

The report said the shift had been most pronounced in India, where the ratio of reported US-dollar holdings has plummeted from around 68 per cent to 43 per cent over the three years to September 2004. China has also been scaling back its holdings, taking its share from 83 per cent to 68 per cent.

enough sleep
2005-03-15— Posted by: allegra

I didn’t actually get enough sleep, seeing as how consciousness smites Paul long about 4 am these days. Anyway, after snarling at him for a few minutes (he was gloating about how all this feeding people Sunday dinner is going to force me to clean our house, which isn’t actually that bad right now, although Paul was going on about it like we had two hundred cats and a beeg ball of aluminum foil that we hadn’t turned into capacitors yet…. oh yeah, I never told that story… anyway, stuff him) he ran away to run, which is good, because it would make us both feel better. Anybody who wants to buy me the t-shirt shown, which is at www.t-shirthumor.com, is certainly welcome to. I won’t stop you. Or you might consider some of the other fine products at that site. Mom, if you go there, there is a t that says “Acid Reflux Made Me Do It”. I know you will immediately want to buy this shirt, but before you do, you should probably know what the popcultref is. Ashley Simpson, a young woman whose talent may not be in proportion to the amount of money spent advertising her, was caught lip syncing on Saturday night live. (By the way… she got a rave review in Georgia Straight. The reviewer was not expecting to enjoy it, and did anyway.) That was her excuse for not singing live…. acid reflux. There, don’t you feel better informed? Keith is running a temperature and may stay home again from school today, and Katie is practically living at Daxus’ (she got in the car last night when we went to pick her up, and said in an extremely mocked out Hispanic accent, “I -Lovv- Heem!” and she keeps doing that and it’s really unutterably cute). All the biscotti are gone. But I have toasted some more almonds. I gave some biscotti to P.D…. did I mention I recorded on Sunday? It was good, definitely heading into Joe Raposo, Burt Bacharach territory…but it ain’t done, I figure another couple of sessions. Oh, and did I mention Sin City? It was fun. Two things stand out, apart from seeing Sabrina and Colin… I like Sabrina, she’s adorable. Anyway, there was a guy there who is A DEAD RINGER FOR OZZIE OSBOURNE. Like who cares, but when you turn around in a line up and there he is, it’s quite startling. And he had spare coupons, so he saved us nine dollars. The other visual I must share is five women all got up like Catholic school girls doing shots in unison. I dunno why, but it got me, right here… (vaguely thumps chest). Apparently my caps glow purple under black light. I’m gonna have to check that out sometime. Good thing they are on the same teeth so they match; would be a drag if they were uneven. In December there was lots of red. This time it was a sea of black. We simply MUST get Paul better pants. I was in a process meeting yesterday, all day, and I HAD THE TIME OF MY LIFE. I am deleting the next few sentences. But it’s true, damnit. I did enjoy it. I stayed til 6:30 to type the notes up, I was so happy. I know, I’m nuts. It was a grindingly hard days’ work, too, we didn’t dick around. I had fantastic roast lamb at the Main on Sunday evening. I am lighting a candle of healing and strength for Heather…. well, lets’ just say she’s glad she’s got a trip booked for Turkey in October… it’s always good to have something wonderful to look forward to, especially when the near term is gonna be so hard. I light one for her husband as well. Paul got up this morning actually sounding cheerful; now he’s back from running and I sumpose I should face the feces and get gone. Everybody have a great day.

walking my feets back home

armageddon tired of this
2005-03-14— Posted by: allegra

I came home last night from singing and playing over at Tom and Peggy’s, and the Pachelbel Canon was playing, and Katie had changed the cat litter. This meant I could vault up the stairs with the Angel first season (borrowed from Brooke) and say look whut I brung ya, which prompted squeals of joy from Number 1 daughter.

I can’t really say anything else about what’s going on in my life, partly because it would be mean, and partly because I’m hoping that I’ll quit choking on other people’s stupid emotions. Hullllooooo? The most important thing about human beings is not their reason, but their passion, for it is the passion that makes them choose how to employ their reason…..sometimes it appears that not much choice is involved. Picture is entitled “Walking my feet back home.”

burning man learnings

2005-03-13— Posted by: allegra

I am reviewing events of the past 24 hours to post and not finding many… lots of events, nothing I can post.

Paul is feeling better, and that means I am too.

All the members of my household, with the possible exception of Pokey, who has taken to attacking people a la psycho kitty, appear to be in good shape. And I’m not sure there is much wrong with Pokey, I think it’s fleas and boredom, personally, both of which John is dealing with.

I had to vamp into the Drama Queen yesterday to get Paul to buy mattresses, but buy them we did, and my back this morning feels okay for the first time in months. The kids got new mattresses too, and I’m very happy about that as we promised them new ones ages ago.

White feathers look cool under blacklight, and my teeth under blacklight look extremely weird because of the matching caps on two front teeth. I’m scared to step on the scale… I drank a lot of beer yesterday.

Jerome is marvellous as always and Cam showed me his equipment… ha ha, it’s a power set up he had for Burning Man, and then he showed us some of the pix he DIDN’T post for Burning Man. There was one series of pictures, and he will remember which one, which was utterly hilarious and very much unsuitable for publication in a family oriented blog, although not by much. Katie watched the slide show with her eyes ‘near out of her head and declared that she wanted to go. I dunno if I could take the heat, and the dust is a killer. And Cam had a site map of Burning Man, a damned big laminated poster. (I know, I’m a weenie, but I freaking love maps.)

He volunteered so I suspect he got some swag that the tourists don’t get. Cam says that it’s definitely a family event provided you can deal with nudity; I’ve had customers tell me (in the course of conversations about other things) that they’d hack off their feet before they took people under 18. Cam is closer and I’d trust his judgement over many other people’s. I go for what Cam says. The street Jerome lives on has the MOST AMAZING cherry blossom display in Vancouver. They are ornamentals, obviously, but they are the double blossom, can’t see the branches for the blossom, white-to-pink ones, and they just vibrated in the afternoon sun yesterday.

Later today I record. Me happy.

Leslie Alexander

enough sleep
2005-03-12— Posted by: allegra

It’s 6:37 in the morning and all the sane people (comparitively speaking) are still asleep. Paul actually slept last night, which is interesting considering that he went to a semi-wake last night for a fallen aviation comrade. Paul was of two minds to go but I convinced him that he should; the aviation community is an interesting bunch and he’s there just as much to support the guys who are unhappy that a long time member of the Boundary Bay community died while flying as to hoist a few in his memory. So he went, and he’s not sorry he did. He tried to convince me to go back to sleep but my head is buzzing like a recently whacked beehive, and there are other things militating against sleep.

John’s boss, may be he praised, grabbed the wheel from Shales for John and John is now going to be able to reassemble the Beemer and grab some of this weather from a two wheeled vantage point.

This week my boss and I stood and watched in awestruck horror as the deciduous tree across the driveway released onto the gentle breeze a cloud of pollen SO THICK that it looked like fog. As far as I can recollect that was the only time this week my boss paused to do something that wasn’t work related.

Pic is an artist’s conception of a black hole – or more properly, the accretion disk – from Astronomy Pic of the Day, of course. Paul just got up and somewhat grumpily requested my attendance for hugs. Since I can’t find a news item I want to comment on, and don’t feel that my laundry list of things to do, physical ailments and ranting about the things I’m exercised about right now would be entertaining, I should slurp back the last of that cold tea and oblige him.

enough sleep
2005-03-12— Posted by: allegra

I’m listening to a Leslie Alexander album. She has a great voice, and I’m regretfully skipping that next thought and going on to something more cheerful. Liked Waiting for the Sun and Bad Girl. Album is called Bird in the House and came out in 1995.

Next up, be still o be still my heart filled up with joy, I get to go see Jerome tomorrow (after the dreaded get groceries shop), who hasn’t appeared before me since the day Mike got the hot tub operational last fall.

Sigh. He’s such a nice young man. Haven’t met his new squeeze but I am waiting with bated breath to be impressed out my socks; he always picks such ugly, uncomely, stupid women …. joking okay~~!? The last one was a complete stunner on four different levels; so scary smart that I felt like a 3 toed moron in 2D in front of her. My lawyer screeched and gripped my chair as if having a seizure upon seeing the next sentence, so I took pity on the crazy old bat and hit the backspace key. Some of my best interests are prurient, I will say that.

Anyway, my interest in Jerome is that of the thoroughly bizarre but occasionally useful oldest sister. I stand in sibling relationship to Jerome, and actually dragged him in front of my mother, calling upon one of the gods for a witness, and told her that I had adopted him and that I was not placing her in that relationship, merely advising her. It was a very beautiful moment in my life, which I contemplate in remembrance with peace.

Anyway I get to see him, and if my luck is extra-crispy, I’ll see his roomie Cam as well. Oh, crunchy goodness of it all. Pretty soon there will be nan bread. Wonder if I can tease Keith into doing the work. Frankly, I think it’s about my turn. I’m the only person in the ****ing house who actually rolls the dough out thin enough. It’s not really food construction as much as an outpouring of bilious energy onto a non-sentient and almost inanimate object. You can beat the hell out of the stuff, and instead of complaining it magically turns into food, most wond(e)rous and strange.

Katie just finished flinging herself around the living room while doing an interpretive dance about young love. It involved touching her hair… a lot. Fun to watch if you like that kind of thing.

I can’t say I was much help. I told her, Give him a deadline in your own mind. Tell yourself he’s got six months, or some other arbitrary length of time, and if he hasn’t smartened up, tell him you’re dating other people.

The timer on the dough just went off as I finished that sentence, how apt, lor. If you’ll excuse me, I have an appointment with the most complaisant of my acquaintances.

Work today was amazing. On about four levels. Oh, shut up and make snackiepoos.

comfy cactus cat

Comfy Cactus Cat
2005-03-11— Posted by: allegra

It’s Darla. Cute kitty day for Allegra.

damn, she’s cute
2005-03-11— Posted by: allegra

Winky, in a very typical pose. As Mike wryly remarked, who needs a pet carrier….

upgrade my baloney detector, puhlease.
2005-03-11— Posted by: allegra

http://www.datanation.com/fallacies/index.htm

Thanks to thatcoloredfellasweblog for the link. I have the Baloney Detector on my desktops, but this is even bettah.

enough sleep
2005-03-11— Posted by: allegra

Good things are slowly taking shape in my life. Wish my ‘mono no aware’ wasn’t cranked up quite so high, though.

all the trees are having sex
2005-03-11— Posted by: allegra

I am considering my next move (although I’m not on my aunt Faye’s couch <—- warning warning PopCultRef.) Should I seek to obtain the imprimatur of Time Magazine as the World’s Most Disgusting Woman? Should I retire to a hut and catch up on my World of Chastity subscription? Perhaps I should go door to door trying to raise money for the Revoluccion? ‘Course, guns make it easier. Should I convert to the Cult of Cthulhu, just in time to collect some eyeballs for the Old Ones’ return? Perhaps I should find a nice hill and contemplate clouds for a while, by myself. Actually, that would almost be nice. Okay, put that one in the almost nice pile.

Sporadically spontaneous. Believe it or not, about 60 seconds ago that’s how Katie characterized herself (after using her brother as a walking dictionary). Very funny. It’s like that all the bloody time around here now. Like living in a sitcom except for watching the implied sex, well, you get the idea.

Hey MOM. If I say Telefunken H-bomb, does it make you inadvertently smile? Isn’t memory weird? For those on the other side of the reference, it’s from an LP we listened to as a young family.

Arden came into the office today, and he’s so cute and lively and cheerful… Can you believe I resisted grabbing him? I knew he’d get grabbed sixteen ways from Sunday that day (and one of the guys who wants pregnancy vibes OBVIOUSLY let him sit in his lap….extremely funny, all that body language.)

The new guy is a woodworker; it’s like there’s a quota or something. I told him the anecdote about the motorcycle engine and the kitchen table and your boss, Mom. He laughed.

Thanks to Grant for triggering the thought that I should do a standup routine about teaching Americans to do customer service for Canuckiphones. “Everybody! after me; calice! tabernac! Ah, good, good, they’ll think you’re natives in no time.” Enough about that. I’m off to Circle tonight…. but Paul isn’t home yet – he should cruise in within ten minutes.

It was good to see P.D. at the ‘Corn last night.

There’s a ‘shopped pic of an 11 engined aircraft on my desktop. I have no certainty who put it there, but I suspect Paul’s got something to do with it.

Katie has drifted ever closer to wanting a bass. A big red one. Wait till she finds out how heavy those sonsabitches are.

I hear a car door, gotta run. Ooops, front door open. Caught with my blog down, yet again……..

???
2005-03-11— Posted by: allegra

Louis Farrakhan is doing outreach to the Black Gay community? Inviting them to march on Washington? Saying they’ve been marginalized within a marginalized community???? I’m rubbing my eyes and wondering if I should file this under Apocalyptic Signs.

racism etc

Pills
2005-03-10— Posted by: allegra

Here’s a gallery of advertising art for psychiatric medication. Japanese style.

http://homepage3.nifty.com/kazano/gallery/index_e.html

Link courtesy of screenhead.com, which I highly recommend.

enough sleep
2005-03-10— Posted by: allegra

I’ve been reading to Paul from Don Miguel Ruiz’ The Four Agreements. It’s great bedtime reading; he either falls asleep, which he needs desperately, or it gives him much needed food for thought.

I promised my coworkers faithfully that I wouldn’t talk about work, so I just went back and deleted the last two paragraphs. It was positive, upbeat and wouldn’t have adversely affected our share prices, but these are parlous times, so I won’t.say.a.word.

Went to the Abercorn “Children of the Corn” open mic in Richmond. It’s run by Lesley Alexander, who has a nice voice, a wonderful Gibson, and is a fabulous host. As I had suspected would happen I went first after the host, and debuted, in public, before an awestruck audience of perhaps twenty beer swilling souls – the TAPIOCA SONG. Folks were singing along before the end, but it is infectious, so there you go. Wash your hands before you rub your eyes! Between the pathogens, the grease and the jalapenos, it’s always a good idea. Also played Lifeline. Very happy to go up there and sing (worked VERY hard on standing, moving, singing and pattering properly, but Paul was running on 3 hours sleep so we baled at 10:16.

I’m in a great mood this morning. Wonder what earthly delights await at the office. Hey, I said I wouldn’t talk about work, but what if I like my job, like my company and think I’m doing something that makes money and the world a better place at the same time? (Okay, cue up JLo whispering “Is that a crime?” from that hit of hers “That Song” a couple years back. I can do dat popcultref wit’ da woist of dem.) Yesterday I told a coworker that he was a wretched and cynical burnt out hulk and he placidly agreed with me. I didn’t tell him what I really think, which is that he has the most amazing eyelashes (and voice) of anybody I work with… because it’s a respectful workplace. Much better to be verbally abusive than complimentary, it looks better in court. And besides, it’s like grade school….. If I am going to go to the trouble of verbally abusing you, it just means I (gasp!) like you, cooties and all.

Still looking for video of female triplets who sing and do acrobatics. I saw some when I was a kid, and I’m thinking that would really make me happy right about now. I’ve decided to be grossly self indulgent. I remember it was really really bad. They couldn’t sing, and their acrobatics were creepy.

In the process of looking for acrobatic singing vaudeville triplets, I tripletted across something else. Whatever you do, don’t visit limbermen.com. You may end up doing something undignified with your coffee.

I also found somebody who’s put together a list of all the movies that have contortionism in them. It is quite unintentionally funny, but I don’t have the link handy. My thumbs used to be double jointed, does that count? I go contort myself now. Thank you. I’ll be here ’til Tuesday.

racism and other things

Boring blog about racism
2005-03-09— Posted by: allegra

It’s bad enough that she spawned me, lo these many years ago (and don’t remind ‘er of how old her oldest kid is) but then I have to go and make fun of yodelling. She sends me an email, all confused-like and says, but I LIKE yodelling, and so I had to do the soothing/patting thing. Personally I like yodelling too; not so much that I’d pay to see somebody do it though. It kinda reminds me of my white heritage. Okay, cue up the worst segue in history…..Like this site here (WARNING – CONTAINS EXTREMELY DISTURBING IMAGES AND WORDS; RACISM, SEXISM, VIOLENCE and really bad cartooning)

http://www.resist.com/CARTOON%20GALLERY/CartoonIndex.htm

Now you can ask why I would post a link to a gallery of White Power cartoons, and the answer is simple. This is my blog, and if I want to, I can. (NOTE: I actually laughed at one of these cartoons, although probly not for the reason the artist intended.) I was actually thinking of reposting one of the cartoons, but the link will have to do.

I have tried very hard to understand the mentality of people who are racists, as well as to come to terms with my own racism. Unlike a lot of pink people, I don’t pretend I’m not a racist. I just try to keep what I think and what I do separate, and I try to remember that being white in Canada is like winning a lottery because somebody tucked the right ticket in your diaper at birth. So I’d like to thank my mother for making me so very pink. I know it was unintentional, but really, it’s been great so far. I understand my colour will change as I get older; c’est la guerre. Anyway, the real reason I posted it is because I’ve been popping off about my life instead of talking about how the world is going to hell in a handbasket. Canada Erwach! And one of the cartoons in the pile is specifically directed at people like me, so I realized that as far as the white power people are concerned, I’m dead, come the “day of reckoning”; it’s nice to know that on that day, I’ll be counted with all the other ‘racist slurs’.

Believe it or not, the dog in the picture is having a good time.

dibs on the drumstick
2005-03-09— Posted by: allegra

This is supposedly an album cover.

greetings from Bonaire
2005-03-09— Posted by: allegra

My dear friend Tammy took this underwater pic in Bonaire. A while back, not recently. I’m gonna eat you little fishies……

recording plus young love

pandas in the snow
2005-03-08— Posted by: allegra

from lycaeum.org
2005-03-08— Posted by: allegra

Contact info
2005-03-08— Posted by: allegra

wohl of sound

production, recording, mixing

p.d wohl (AKA Paul D.Wohlstetter)

pdwohl@shaw.ca

604-684-6075

Can’t recommend him highly enough, I’m going back to record soon soon soon. Also there’s an open mic p.d. mentioned in Richmond which I am going to investigate this week if the winds are kind and the fates propitious.

I’m waiting for hubby to show up so I can get the car. I scarcely slept last night, I was so excited. Woo hoo! Maybe I’m going manic again! That would explain the dancing, I s’pose.

Nice long talk with Toribird (Tori actually means bird in Japanese, so I could also call her Toritori) last night about art and other stuff. I keep shaking my head at the upbringing other people get and being very humble and thankful about the upbringing I got, and I light a candle in my heart for her, she’s very wonderful. I love your voice, you know that!? I wish you weren’t so busy at Emily Carr, I’d be dragging you into the studio with me. But other people have their lives…..

Hm, if I am doing my spring insanity thing I should probly take my credit card outta my bag. Nah. I won’t do anything stupid, all I have to to is thingk about Paul glowering at me. Glower, glower. Why do I have this sudden urge to giggle? It’s all the bloody sunshine in February. I haven’t felt like this since I lived in Montreal, that memorable spring where I went completely ape and this part deleted. Ah, Montreal in the spring. It’s like sex with your clothes on. It’s like Saint Saens organ music rushing through your spine and leaving you hollowed out and marvelling. And the maple trees give me two weeks of laryngitis and post nasal drip.

Worked on the mando part for that sappy love song last night, after listening to Lifeline about 5 times. I still can’t believe p.d. and I did that, it’s like waking up from a coma and finding out you had a baby in the interim. Keith is making nan bread right now, having made the dough yesterday. There’s nothing like fresh nan, it’s like the happiest thing. I’m just happy all over and a few places undescribed.

Katie is still in the blissful stage of young love, and wanting to know how you transition to the solid, we’re together and bad things and bad communication and bad moods can’t wreck it phase. Wish the hell I knew, I could make a lot of money, she opined gloomily. But I can’t stay gloomy. I may have made another convert to Lymond !!!! I am the happiest woman in Canada. My description of Lymond so intrigued Brooke that she is now borrowing “The Game of Kings” and she will soon find out some interesting facts.

The crossover between Buffy fans and Lymond fans is very very close. I remember when I first started going to Spits (Dunnett fan club meetings are called Spits for reasons I won’t get into here) that everybody was raving about Buffy and OF COURSE since I don’t have cable and I don’t watch network television anyway because it activates the consumptive parasite in my amygdala I didn’t know wtf they were talking about. Not all Buffy fans are Dunnett fans, but a LOT of Dunnett fans are Buffy fans, mostly because Dunnett is A LOT about Moral Ambiguity. And Buffy is chock full of it. So if Brooke falls into the evil clutches of the ladies (and guy, we have one wonderful AND TALENTED O MY GOD gent) who spit, then she will be assimilated with nary a belch nor backward glance. And Lymond. The best hero ever. Nuff babbling, my chariot has arrived.

oinkment

enough sleep
2005-03-07— Posted by: allegra

http://www.yodelcourse.com/level1/level1.html

Saw this, thought of you.

Pic is of Flotilla Debarge, a well known NY trans-entertainer who is being sued by Star Jones for, like, parodying her. Anybody who knows anything about Star Jones would be of the considered opinion that you cannot parody someone like her. As far as I know it is not possible to bring the administration of Star Jones into disrepute by doing anything, as she’s already got that in a major headlock. My question to you is, could you mistake this entertainer for Star Jones? Please feel free to google Star Jones’ image and compare for yourself. Then, pretend you just had a full body-on with a Dementor and eat some chocolate. Or, you can just skip the whole thing and say “I’m allergic to chocolate, ya silly cow – and why should I care about this anyway?”

enough sleep
2005-03-07— Posted by: allegra

A fly has emerged from my oinkment. Okay, that was a bit obscure, even for me. I was just wanting to make a philosophical comment about how one can be in the finest mood which ever issued from the cerebral cortex of any human creature, and still something will come along and … you know … not be optimal. And you have to stop and deal with it, and next thing you know, your mood, always a variable commodity, has up and split and left you as you were, a screeching crone with breath that could knock a vulture off an outhouse. Or a pile of corpses. I certainly don’t think of myself in those bad crone like terms. Nope, I remember those pictures I have, and I am frozen in time. As I have commented in previous blogs (here I am being recursive), I had artistic black and white pictures of myself taken (nude… but fairly figleafed) when I was 22. I have to tell you, of all of the impulsive, and on the face of it, dopey, things I’ve done in my life, that doesn’t even make the list.

Yeah, I was right to delete this next line. No way to make it salubrious, even when it was no longer libellous.

You see, I can look at those pictures, and the compelling weight of damned near a quarter century comes a-peeling off. The girl in those pictures – and she does look like a girl to me – felt things more or less the same way I do. She certainly had the same enthusiasms, without the finesse. I don’t feel much different from her. My responsibilities, and my responses to things, are different. I have a much more respectful sense of my own best interests than I did then (what’s that line, about good judgement coming from bad decisions?) and I’m much more respectful of the feelings of others than I used to be, mostly because I now actually believe that other people do have feelings. Took a very long time to get there. Paul might argue (although he’d wake up in hospital) that I’m still not there. On the other hand these days he’s being somewhat more appreciative of me, and demonstrating it in a fashion I find difficult to dislike.

I will deal with this latest hull breach with the same verve and skill I brought to the last one, and hope that as I apply my rear end to the hole, in the effort to prevent the vacuum of space from destroying my life, that my tender heinie will not have been sacrificed in vain.

The short version: I am feeling insecure. My personal info is all over the internet. I am experiencing nausea, annoyance and waves of panic. And I asked for it, or so I believe, so I cannot complain, except in the most lameassed way. I can only thank a merciful Providence that those goddamned pictures haven’t excaped. Frankly, they aren’t that good…. they’re just imbued with a sentiment which would be damaged by commerce.

I wanted to blog about those 4 RCMP who were killed, but I will limit myself to making three points:

There are times when you call in a tactical squad. We spend a lot of money, as taxpayers, training and arming folks in tactical squads.

There will be an investigation, and there will be a coverup. The incompetence of the investigation will be no match for the incompetence of the coverup, and we will probably find out more than we want to about how the next level in the chain of command ignored common sense in the hurry to get the boys some real action.

Whether or not the Mounties take a suitable profit from this carnage will be debatable, but if I was a Mountie myself I’d be going Holy Crap and reading everything I could get my hands on about dealing with gunfire in confined spaces, since it’s obvious my boss will be too busy fielding pointed telephone calls from various media to actually be of any assistance when the trigger is pulled. Maybe, just maybe, somebody will develop a checklist, like they have in aviation, that tells you that when you’re dealing with a known cop-hater gun nut ex-felon with a pack of slavering Dobermans who’s chased a bailiff off his property so recently that the death threats are still ringing in his ears, that you take along body armor, at least ten guys, and something punchier than a 12 gauge. Or maybe that’s just me, and I was reading the description wrong. I will be very interested to talk to the gun toting men of my acquaintance about this tragedy, as they are wise and wily, and their counsel is always worth hearing.

up in the air

enough sleep
2005-03-06— Posted by: allegra

Very pleasant gathering at Peggy& Tom’s filled with salmon-y goodness last night. I debuted Lifeline for everybody except Tom, who had heard it during the mishigass with getting the motorcycle onto the truck (and then Shales said they wouldn’t take it, and then they fixed it but didn’t return the frikkin wheel! John was about fit to be tied, in a calm, John like way).

I debuted the song I posted yesterday (yes… sappy don’t even BEGIN to cover it) and at one point Ben played something that matched perfectly with the mando part for ANOTHER song I am working up (‘Sophia’ which I posted part of earlier) and the two instruments together sounded bloody amazing. The rest of the evening we did hymns, including Lady of the Seasons Laughter which I’ve never had much of a jones for.

Brooke, may the Goddess protect and discipline her as required, has requested that I hand over the Lymond books. Okay, kid, don’t say I didn’t warn you. And no freaking spoilers. I want to hop up and down and say “Don’t get too attached to so and so, Dunnett kills ’em. And you’re never going to guess who ends up marrying him. And guess what? aaaaaahhhhh shaddddddapp!” The bad part is OF COURSE that Brooke is now going to figure out where I stole all my best lines from. One piping hot The Game of Kings, coming up. Ignore the frikkin cover, until they were reissued in the 90’s they all sucked a mop.

Off today to buy another set of headphones for the Lyra I bought myself (which Katie promptly preempted, like I couldn’t see that coming) because between Keith and Kate the headphones got blown up, still don’t have a straight story about that, and maybe some flash memory since I actually have some money!!! and I should pick up my King Cobb Steelie album. Life is like really okay right now.

Paul came home from working midnights and while I was sitting at the computer gave me a kiss on the back of the neck that made all the hairs on my body (with which I am, alas, liberally endowed) stand up. I am feeling so entirely drenched in romance today – okay, it’s salad oil, but who’s being specific – that I feel like I’m walking into a Pender Island sunset, all molten pink and orange and grey. A big shout out to Mike and Tori…. I still feel kinda boneless and un-whiny from the soak on Friday night.

I have what I consider a totally hilarious anecdote about my current mental state, which is somewhere between Gershwin and the worst excesses of Bollywood, but I can’t post it. It does involve dancing.

Margaret Cho, in her FABULOUS interview with Bust magazine lo these many years ago (and she’s coming to town, who’s goin’ with me?) said that she identified with Judy Garland, in that Judy couldn’t work unless she had a crush. But what if you have multiple crushes on multiple people? Well then you work very very hard, I guess. (Criminy, I’m writing songs as fast as my poor mandolin-creased fingees can manage it….!)

These next 4 lines deleted….

I know it won’t last. That’s why I’m enjoying it so much.

Keith is doing pushups. I feel tired now, and I just got up.

Katie has decided she wants a bass. I was standing outside Neil Douglas guitars yesterday after getting pins and strings and picks, and she said “That’s the axe I want” and I closed in to get a better view and frikkin near broke my nose when I tried to put it through the window. Katie screamed “I do that all the time!” and burst out laughing, while flopping her arms around. Glad I could be of service. And I’m in such a good mood all I could do was laugh.

Oh and I’m supposed to buy my beautiful, good natured daughter shoes today. I don’t think they are going to be Phat Farm, but I can deny her nothing when she gets ‘that look’ on her face.

kiddofspeed reference

enough sleep
2005-03-05— Posted by: allegra

If I could write a song for you

There’d be so much I couldn’t say

You’re not supposed to have a clue

Because it’s easier that way

your smile is like a present

your frown can wreck my day

But I’ll pretend this song’s for someone else

Because it’s easier that way

Chorus

I tell myself I shouldn’t play I spy

look at you when you walk by

Not supposed to give you the eye

But how can I stop myself

Sometimes I think you always knew

You are having fun at my expense

But then I’d have to say it’s true

I love it when it’s this intense

your voice makes me feel dreamy

your laugh makes a sunny day

But I’ll pretend this song’s for someone else

Because it’s easier that way

Chorus

Bridge

If I spent more time with you I’d have to finally get real

And I’d have to do some work and not just coast on how I feel

Second verse again and then fade….

Isn’t it bizarre? And the tune is something like a cross between Burt Bacharach/Hal David and the Indigo Girls. Brian C just looked at me when I said this and asked me if he and Jim E should come over to my place to do an intervention.

Much beer and nachos consumed at the golf course last night. We hadn’t done that in ages and ages. Paul showed up all happy and with his Apocalypse dodging face on, so the rest of the evening would have been great even if it hadn’t been so great, if you know what I mean. And Jim A was there! I was so happy to see him I thought my heart would burst. We had a nice long Buffychat and they looked at the pix I have of theplacewhereIwork which were taken in 97 98 and 99. Very funny, especially when you look at the married couples who weren’t married yet, and the people who were sleeping together, etc etc. Regular little Peyton Place, but with fewer tranquillizers…. And Paul got to talk airplanes with Rob of Nine, and I ministered to the needy (gave neck rubs – only Chari reciprocated!!!) and then we dropped Rob of Nine off and headed up the road to Mike’s place.

Mike is the most hopeless romantic of any man I know personally (part of his ocean of charm) and this is what he did for their six month anniversary. Pay attention, Mom, this part’s great. He got her flowers. Yeah, whatever. Then he fed her a really nice Japanese meal. Very standard issue. And THEN when she got back to his place, there’s a 1930’s issue Remington typewriter sitting on the kitchen table for her, which completely functions and is squeaky clean and is a frikkin model of industrial design. Unbelievably sexy (black of COURSE) and wonderful. Tori burst into tears, she was so happy, and I would have done much the same.

So as soon as I get through the door at their place I pull out my CD of Lifeline (reaction has been favourable to say the least, so far) and Mike of course was very happy I was happy about it, seeing as how it was his recommendation earlier this week that put me onto Paul W.

Then we soaked for a long time. Left at quarter after three.

I love Mike’s cat. Winky is so much nicer now that she doesn’t have to live with dogs. And she’s pretty, the prettiest tabby I think I’ve ever seen.

Every tree in Vancouver is having sex right now, so I am itchier and crabbier than usual.

Eniwess I think you can tell that I am in a good mood, and in all respects my evening was completely perfect; Tori is forgiven for forgetting the moose. And that’s another story.

This morning the boys (really I should say men, except that men are more boring than boys) including Tom L are going to toss a motorcycle into the back of John’s boss’s van so it can be fixed. And when that’s over I’m going to pick up the ecstatic sounding Katie from her boyfriend’s place (yup, another night away, isn’t it AWFUL?) and go get her boyfriend guitar strings. I’d get him a roofing axe too, but apparently he doesn’t want me to do that, and that too is a long story.

Hang in there Peter T, it can get better.

Oh, the song is actually for Katie and Daxus, and Katie has heard it and she likes it. And the reason I need a trumpet player is because the opening notes I hear in trumpet. I think getting a good recording of this will be hard, read expensive.

I light a candle for Heather’s eye, and her dad too.

I light a candle of joy and thanksgiving for Paul’s deliverance, and from ducking that darned apocalypse again.

I light a candle for Katie’s voice on the phone this morning.

one up one down
2005-03-05— Posted by: allegra

To my annoyance, Rob of Nine pointed out that the woman who motorcycled through Chernobyl is a fraud. Damnyou. I really enjoyed the kiddofspeed pictures, but it turns out they were bogus.

On the plus side, Courtney Love actually makes sense. http://dir.salon.com/tech/feature/2000/06/14/love/index.html

My bonus was over $400 (after the government’s excision) and I’m spending it all on recording – not, as Jim E. said, on another stick of gum (nearly typed bum).

The Tapioca song will be posted here soon, I promise, as soon as I bribe the God Like Glen to put it someplace on my site. Oh, I guess I have to record it first.

Anybody know a decent trumpet player who can play by ear?

Hot tub tonight. Beer first. Mehappy.

throw me a lifeline

recording
2005-03-04— Posted by: allegra

Thrilled out of my mind to report that I recorded with Paul W. last night in his studio/apartment on Fraser, and OH MY HEAVENS. In three hours we got a demo song, which includes a voice track, two mando tracks, one acoustic guitar track, one slide guitar track (oooo tasty!), one bass track and some delightful sixties style organ – and this includes the effing and effing about as well as the rough mix at the end. Holy crap! I thought Gomi was fast – and he is! – but Paul W, despite being almost as relaxed to work with, moves with BLINDING SPEED (he uses Cubase). We recorded Lifeline and it came out GREAT. Yes, I need to re-record the vocal track, but I don’t care. Big big BIG shout out to Mike for telling me about him and an ecstatic candle of joy for Paul W for being totally amazing to work with and to Paul for ponying up the cash. Pic is from one of Paul W.’s CD covers. Heard some of his stuff last night, I was impressed as hell. Crowded evening, wot?

workshop

enough sleep
2005-03-03— Posted by: allegra

Today I think I’ll wear purple to the apocalypse, although it does involve ironing, something I usually try to avoid. Big shout out to my mom and Tom and Peggy for the spiritual and practical support during this exceedingly trying time.

Tried to hook up with Rob and Lexi last night to give them the money they are owed but was not successful. The Write from the Heart workshop was interesting and got me thinking about a lot of things.

Watching “Once More, With Feeling” as many times as I have now has shaken a few things loose. I ended up writing an extremely poppy (adult contemporary, may the Holy Virgin intercede on my behalf) and somewhat jazz inflected tune. It’s like being possessed. I can’t do anything else until it’s done, and then there’s DJD in my mental background – he’s always there, he never bloody goes away, it’s like being haunted – asking me sternly where the bridge to the song is. Or maybe not sternly. Maybe quizzically, or ‘in the spirit of earnest enquiry’. So although I hate bridges (I do, I’m opposed to them as being unnecessary) I had to write one anyway. That was Monday, or maybe Tuesday, and I was at work when the loa took me. (Didn’t take long, thank heaven). Then I texted Katie with the first 4 lines – no room for more – and finally, after writing the song on Tuesday, got to sing it for her last night (because I sort of wrote it for her and Daxus). It’s very cute and I didn’t do any of the usual “aren’t I good with words and look at what heroic efforts I made to ensure my rhyme schemes aren’t boring and the words match the melody perfectly and everything scans even when you aren’t singing it” crap that I normally pull when I’m writing lyrics – tried to make it so simple that it COULD have been written by somebody else. I believe I was successful. And off to the studio tonight. Ha ha, he has a Larrivee. Take that.