Day: January 18, 2005

Okay, I admit it! This blog is for my mother. I don’t call her nearly enough, like maybe once a week, and this is how she finds out what’s going on with me. Since I designed this blog with her in mind, I don’t talk about work, because my mother prefers me employed; and I don’t talk about my sex life because I can hear her grit her teeth 70 k away, and besides she raised me not to brag. And Brother James would send me a scalding email about how he’s gone from ‘wondering about me’ to being actively sure I am completely nuts.

I write about what interests me and post pictures I think my mother will enjoy. More or less. She wasn’t too keen on the cheese grater toilet paper, but I kissed and made up by sending her a link to an interactive Irish pig. Sounds cute, doesn’t it? She liked it.

I’ve read that some people end up in trouble when their mothers read their blogs, but I think if you’re cruising glory holes, planning the overthrow of the government, giving trip reports for ketamine, dissing your employer, or outing your uncle for child abuse, your mother finding out is the least of your worries. The internet is not forever, but it will definitely be hangin’ around as long as the power grid holds up. I mean, look at me, I even stopped swearing on my blog. Got the kids to think about.

Katie insists that I take back my comment about the non bf being a louse. Tonstant mommie fwow up. (this is a Dorothy Parker reference. Read her biography, What fresh hell is this. And while you’re at it read the Mae West bio A Life in Black and White).

WELL 2019 SAYS HE IS A FUCKING LOUSE

I did it again. I wrote a thousand words or so, and it all disappeared when I hit some key or other. Highlights: Keith saying “I saw the Day After Tomorrow the day before yesterday” causing me to have hysterics. Katie still MSNing with Non Boyfriend, and me having no further comment. Telling Tish that eventually hubby should be taking 1 gram vitamin C, 1 multi B 100, 50 micrograms at least of selenium, zinc but not at the same time as the vitamin C. Enjoying that LJ called me.

Dreamed that I crawled into what I thought was the truck of a friend to sleep and when I woke up I didn’t recognize either of the people I’d spent the night with. Me being apologetic, and them placing some weird looking objects on the ground for me to pick up, which upon closer inspection resolved into five objects which it would be impolitic to more specifically describe. I remember being really startled about that. I mean, it would have been impolite to refuse, but it was really inconvenient to accept, because the second I picked them up, I started getting chased around by the youth group, who were trying to get me to drop them. Ineffectual attempts to hide them. Finally they chased me onto the roof of a really elderly building and I dropped one and they ran off with it.

Weird.

I know animal abuse is never funny, but like most bad haircuts, this grew back. The cat’s expression sums it up.