two rants one post

Great moments in memery: Hong Kong authorities gluing down paving bricks in advance of arrival of Zhang Dejiang.

The article bringing me this information DID NOT tell me what Zhang does for the old National People’s Congress of China.

A quick scan of the internet shows he has all ten fingers inserted firmly in a nested set of large pies, including Hong Kong.

For whom Zhang Dejiang is the top official, full stop. “k guys let’s make sure top boss doesn’t get clarned.”

and this is why CNN and much of the MSM is so frikkin useless; news items are floating around in a context-free zone.

THE ABOVE NOTED IS A RANT FROM TWITTER THIS MORNING.

THE BELOW NOTED IS just me twirling my hair.

The best way to fight fascism is to fight shame.

That seems like a BSS – a broad, sweeping statement like my fOlks warned me about a long time ago. So first let me define my terms, and then take you on a little journey through my lazy, inept thinking, at the end of which you’ll wonder why you bothered.

By fight I mean resist, reverse and permanently disable.

By fascism, I mean any system of human organization which claims to put societal benefit first but can only seem to accomplish that benefit with tools including mandatory military service, state worship of the sanctity of marriage and every last one of its stultifying and inhumane and culturally sensitive strictures, institutionalized racism up to and including genocide, environmental destruction in the pursuit of military and economic strength to be able to enforce that societal benefit first (they are coming for our WayO’Life!), mass incarceration of religious, personal and political enemies, state religion, and militias composed of human beings who couldn’t otherwise be expected to find employment, given that a lot of them are violent sociopaths. By fascist I mean anybody who thinks these tools are great and is either using them now or plans to as soon as feasible.

By this definition the Canadian government isn’t fascist to me, but it is likely to be perceived that way by First Nations and other people of colour. So I’ve defined fascism so that it includes Daesh and the Third Reich without a hiccup, kinda includes Saudi Arabia and Israel and the US, only includes Canada if you’re on the pointy end of the stick and doesn’t include Iceland unless you’ve already granted civil rights to whales.

By shame, I’m not talking about the mass wave of public shaming that seems to have swept over the whole planet like a sickness. I’m talking about shame so deep, so personal, so unspoken, so unspeakable, that the person feeling it cuts it off, pastes it to an enemy, and then tries to kill that enemy.

If Hitler had taken his shame about his alcoholic father, his anger, fear and hatred of the crazy old female relative locked in the attic, the whispers about having a Jew for an ancestor (never borne out in law but certainly there was circumstantial evidence if you looked) and kept it to himself, he might have disappeared from history except as a valiant warrior in the Great War. Instead, one last and overarching civic shame, that touched every part of postwar life, so that he could go nowhere and do nothing without its influence, animated him into political life. The reparations forced by the allies made every part of him long for revenge. And as long as he was going to revenge himself, he might as well mercy-kill the weak, exterminate the verminous jews and cleanse the Aryan bloodline to expunge his own family history.

Let us think of a world in which that man was not ashamed.

So ashamed he had the energy to force the world to his will, or a damned big chunk of it.

That’s what I mean by, the best way to fight fascism is to fight shame.

Once you grant that there may be some truth in this broad sweeping statement, the question is, how do you fight shame? In modern culture you fend off shame by splitting it off, pasting it onto someone else, and then hating them to prevent the emotional load of actually naming it and healing from it.

Now suppose, for the sake of a good story, there already exists on this planet tools for dealing with shame, separate from the private and shameful meetings well-heeled and court-appointed folks have with mental health professionals.

And it’s in the rituals of expulsion and re-inclusion, which are part of the languages and folkways of indigenous peoples everywhere, that we will find it, not in our courts, and not in our public media contests, and not in the conscienceless babblings of our politicians. The justice system automatically others. Long practice of indigenous peoples is to draw people back in when they have done something injurious to public safety and morality, and to kick them out only if they prove to be an intractable problem. The drawing back in process is filled with ritual, and enables a space in which injury and restitution are heard and processed in a dignified and meaningful way, one that reinforces one’s sense of belonging to a group of people where all are honoured and shame can be lived down because the people you live with understand injury and restitution, without othering. You may be brought back in right relation with the world. It is hard, and for some offences, hard for everyone in the community. But the ability for human beings to live like that has been established. It is part of our way of being, had we but the language to speak of it. To make justice is the highest use of language, at least if you’re not young and trying to get some.

Of course there’s some major ‘don’t wear white shoes after Labour Day’ stuff in ritual, old and modern, indigenous and pagan; it’s not my intention to romanticize injurious or scientifically suspect beliefs or ones that are, to my atheist-raised heart, ludicrous on sight.

But I know that as well as being the innocent victims in the major, ongoing, genocide-inflected civil rights issue of language expungement, the languages of Turtle Island and the people who carry them are precious because they make a more human-scale and humane justice possible. English doesn’t have the capability, in its current form, to bend toward justice. Only a language untainted by two hundred years of having advertising plastered all over its public spaces could handle justice now; English has been cranked through history’s mill and emerged as the pander of capitalism and the thief of serious thought.

Perhaps I’m kicking English, my home away from home, a little too hard. I suppose we could have the kind of world that can properly deal with injury, shame, offence and forgiveness in English. It would be hard. We’d have to change our language, and that makes people very angry, and very anxious, and very afraid that the ghosts and demons of childhood indoctrination will get them. That is what people kick at when they kick at political correctness. They are fighting the fights of their parents, even though they are in the ground. They don’t want to be ashamed of their parents. That is what political correctness is asking them to do. Feel shame. We have no mechanism for dealing with it, no way to acknowledge fault and be re-accepted by our tribe. There is no ritual. There is merely English, with more holes in it than Clisson had when he reported to King Charles how he was doing: “Feebly, sire.”

Think for a moment of the kind of shame that Adolf Hitler experienced as a child, and how his injuries would have been addressed in a culture where justice is inclusive rather than othering. Where someone could have recognized his injuries at all. Where he could have gone to live with kinder people instead of the father who beat him, and away from the crazy old lady who screamed in the attic at night and frightened him. Where the rumour that he had Jewish ancestors wouldn’t have held any sting, nor the bastardy in his bloodline.

Tell me that I’m wrong when I say that the best way to fight fascism is to fight shame.

Laundry and housefilk

Got some laundry done. Some day it will all be put away.  In this case I had to put that load away because it was my bed sheets and duvet cover and I wanted to sleep.

Jeri Lynn and Jeff C were there, as well as Paul and Keith, so it was a small and intimate affair.

Paul IS SO ENJOYING his new eyeball.  Never met anybody quite so ebullient in his enthusiasms.

I did not in fact do any sewing yesterday as I promised mOm. All my effort was put into getting the damned machine set up properly, as apparently I hadn’t managed it.  Then I was so bummed out I put it away. Try again today.

Today Mike’s cooking me dinner. I have no idea what it will be except yummy. I’m going to be prepping something…. I defrosted some chuck.

850 words on a new story “The Invoice”

Mike invited me to the beach today and I can’t go because I have a housefilk to go to this afternoon.  I’m a bit choked candidly.  I’m thinking of my social life of late (“Ten percent of nothin’ is, let me do the math here… nothin’ and a nothin’, carry the nothin’… ” comes to mind) and of course two big events in one day. One involves carrying Otto down the Numberless Stairs of Ts’ats’lhm (like holy fuck, if that isn’t a fantasy story title of great white entitlement, since that is as far as I have determined to date the Skwomish name for Wreck) while I ask my guardian spirits to prevent me from having a) a dizzy spell b) leg cramps c) oopsydaisy trip and destroy Otto d) an encounter with a profoundly altered and antisocial half naked man when I’m finally RELAXED and who doesn’t know that I’ve promised myself that the next half naked fucked up guy who bugs me is going to get clownsprayed (see my twitter feed for what that’s all about) e) you get the idea

OR

I can get a ride to Tom and Peggy’s and commune with a cheering proportion of my favourite filkers, although I’ll have to take my own beer.

 

Hafalda is Kima’s ‘approved name’ in Iceland. Half an hour of research yielded nothing closer to Benthesikyma, and now I’m rolling around in glosses of translations.

Saw Keith and Paul yesterday and went for a little walk in the neighbourhood.

 

later… found the reference.

xwayxway = Mask place = Lumbermans Arch. Elksn = Point of land = Point Grey. Ts’ats’lhm = cold place = Wreck Beach. P’e’kwcha = Flat back = Spanish Banks. kwekw7u’pay’ = Lots of wild crab apple trees = Locarno Beach. Uy’a’l’mexw = Good Land = Jericho Beach. i7iy’al’mexw = Good Camping Ground = Eastern Jericho Beach. xepxpay’em = Having red Cedar = Kits Beach.

 

One of my facebook friends may lose her house to a wildfire in Gold Bar WA. That’s a two hour drive away.  The future is yellow skies and ash.

It got bigger

I edited and added an interview with Michel to book III.

Yesterday was almost entirely taken up with helping Paul.  I also unplugged a restaurant toilet (it came pre-plugged) and helped a bunch of hard working nurses and techs avoid dealing with the mentally ill husband of one of the cataract patients (“Does your husband wear a hat? May I take you to him?” after I’d heard him screaming at the caregivers. They were abjectly grateful. srsly.).  My day-sign told me to be kind to everybody today and I really tried hard to do that, including being kind to me.

Paul on Ativan.  He’s basically a very cheerful fella, yanno? I could hear him chaffing with the doc and he unsterilized the sterile field and got a right talking to.

Then we couldn’t leave for 45 minutes because his BP was ludicrous. Calmed down nicely after a while.

He took me to LA Sushi for lunch, which happened around 4 pm. Then I walked home since, er, he couldn’t exactly drive. Although he offered to. Blind in one eye and cheerfully inflated with Ativan, no thanks I’ll walk.

I am disappointed on his behalf that brO is not getting his gaming weekend with his buddies and hope that the reason his friend bowed out is resolved soon.

I’m desperate to start writing again but I can’t find the chapter précis for the Midnight Moving book although I know it’s in my room, probably in one of these here boxes. I think I could probably reconstruct it and I probably should.

All those hand lettered brush fonts that look so cool now are going to be ghastly and sucky in five years.

I am TOTALLY IN WRITING WITHDRAWAL. And I want to work on XENOLEGUM instead of editing or working on what Jeff asked me to work on.  BANG HEAD HERE SUFFERING BASTARD.

Progress: cheat sheet slash glossary

I’ve made a start on the glossary Diane suggested I do. I am only just reading her comments on Sweep off those waves and I am somewhat downcast.

This morning I’m driving Paul to where he’s going to have his first cataract surgery. Stooging about hospitals, yay!!! All things being equal and this being the land of polite lineups we’ll probably be 5 hours total in transit and stooging. We did a dry run yesterday, and I’m glad we did, since we combined it with a visit to Al and Katie which was exceedingly pleasant and included visiting with all the furbabies (Toes & Tigger the kitties, who are sleek and Lizzie the dog, who is getting very old and itchy) and talking about canoeing.

After we went to Planet Bachelor, where Keith greeted us and we ate a very pleasant lunch.

I wrote another 200 words, but they don’t belong here, because they were essentially hate speech against someone who’s not capable of defending himself.

Ah, to be an ally and white is to learn to stop finding excuses to interrupt.

 

 

Day 1 post writing

Now that I’m not trying to grind out something to edit I have to do the following:

Get everything copy edited that hasn’t been.

Make final drafts of the edited manuscripts.

Make PDF versions of the final drafts for comments by beta readers.

Learn how to prepare e-books and turn all the books into e-books and test them quite thoroughly.

Prep the cover art in accordance with the requirements. (ISBN number etc etc.)

Figure out how to make a instant print file.

Continue to try to find an agent.

Yeah I’m going to be busy.

 

 

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Damn, we’re done with Call the Midwife until it comes back in 8 months.

Rewatching the Expanse.  They took extraordinary care with the casting; now that I’ve read the first 4 books in the series I can confirm that Chrisjen is like the hole in one of casting, and the crew of the Rocinante is of a piece with that.  Did I mention I love Wes Chatham as Amos? GUESS WHAT HE GETS EVEN BETTER IN THE NOVELS. He has a couple of lines (usually with Holden) that are excruciatingly funny.  Think Jayne with even better tactical sense and a truly wicked sense of humour. The Texan-talking subcontinent dude (Alex the pilot) is straight from the book as well, and he’s a great character.

Jeff took me to breakfast. I ate from the over 55 menu. Do you hear that mOm… the over 55 menu. (dun dun.)

I bought myself a Mother’s Day treat but the more I thought about it the less I felt like hiding in my room and eating it so I’ll be sharing it with Jeff tomorrow. Why yes it has chocolate in it, whyjja ask?

Miss Margot is still coming into my room every day for scritches even though I still do all the life maintenance on her. Either she’s jealous of Buster or she’s finally figured out I scritch okay.

 

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Lovely day yesterday pre-mother’s daying.  Alex had a wonderful time in the beautiful kiddy park next to the as yet unopened petty zoo. The New Westminster parks officials have their heads screwed on straight. Given a choice between turning the water in the spray park on before May 24 weekend and turning it on when it was a blistering hot day, THEY TURNED IT ON. If we get freezing weather I’m sure they’ll turn it off again.

Feeling so unhappy about #YMMfire. The fact nobody died is a testament to the strength of character of the emergency workers and the survival instincts of the evacuees. One thousand square kilometres burned or burning. Eighty-five thousand evacuees. If we drop that patch over Vancouver, that means EVERYTHING FROM UBC TO BOUNDARY ROAD, FROM STANLEY PARK TO YVR is burned or burning. And if that was the case we’d have a million evacuees.

The chances are good more fires will start this weekend. The firefighters will have work all summer.

Anyway between our very lazy and affectionate day yesterday and simply not feeling like writing, I haven’t done much. I will finish it.

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Carl Beijer, “This is what I see in liberal journalists who call themselves feminists, but who only care about the problems of rich women: a toxic blend of apathy for their comrades and ambition for themselves. If America, as Steinbeck supposedly put it, is a land of “temporarily embarrassed millionaires”, liberal journalism is an industry of temporarily embarrassed executive editors, would-be Jill Abramsons who are fine with laying off hundreds of women as long as they’re the ones who get to do it.

Above is from Avedon Carol’s website, which I highly recommend if you’re into fantasy, feminism and awesome writing.

I had a slack day yesterday. Started on the Expanse novel Cibola Burn. I LOVE AMOS, HIS ATTITUDE IS THE BEST.  “I am a killer but I will stay with people who have moral agency and they will point me at the right people when the killin’ starts.” Also he’s funny.

If I thought I could even get close to this restaurant today I’d go, but oh well, happy Cinco de Mayo Taqueria Playa Tropical, you make the best Mexican food I ever et north of the 49th.

Instead, I’ll be having a pre mother’s day meal at Planet Bachelor with the immediate fam and Jeff if he feels like coming.

Family sayings and terms

Ingredaments

Never shoplift when you’re hungry. John

Heroes and heroines drive convertibles. the folks, updated for sexism

Never blame mean for dumb. (Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately accounted for by stupidity.)

I’m glad you showed up, I only had one bus ticket. John again.

Thirty, officer, m a y b e thirty-one. Ron Mahadeo, after making a London ON police officer chase him about ten miles and being asked how fast he was going.

I bet you don’t know something that I don’t know that I’m not going to tell you. Katie aged 7

We’re going to Mars????? Katie aged 4, She asked me where we were going, and I said TAMAR’S and that was her response.

What’s left of him is very dead indeed. (from Wrong Box.)

We used to suck, but now we blow. (from a memorable customer service interaction back in the day regarding what kind of exhaust fan the inverters have.)

“Sir I understand your disappointment with the product but I can’t rearrange the laws of physics or remove the warnings from the user guide!” same same

The earth gravities my mind system, and I forget things. (Keith, aged 6).

They’re cooking their dinner in a garbage can! (Keith, aged 4).

Egbwa! Keith aged less than one year.

It’s a wonderful day for pie! (Family Guy)

“It is most uncomfortable.” Keith aged 8 having fallen asleep with gum in his mouth, only to have it sneak out of his gob and wind itself around his entire body including (that’s enough – ed.)

A low standard to be sure – one of John’s faves.

 

 

 

 

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Que l’on continue.

This is what Lucien Bouchard wrote to his well wishers when he got flesh-eating disease.

Like many French idioms it doesn’t translate well. It is a well bred way to say Keep on Trucking. It literally means ‘which is continous’ so it has echoes of ‘I’m still standing’ as well.  Anyway, it’s one of my favourite franco-canadian idioms and I think it applies during the writing process as well.

Paul and I went walking at Burnaby Fraser Foreshore Park yesterday and it was so frikkin hot I was a cheese melt by the time I got back. Thank you Paul it was necessary to get out!

Jeff and I have already shopped, glad not to do it in the heat of the day.  I think this rain is going to burn off, you can feel it.