From the Annals of Customer Service:
We are no longer allowed to use that unfortunate four letter f-word with respect to our products when communicating internally or externally in writing. It’s in all of the user guides, but we’re not allowed to use it…..
Please indicate which of the following euphemisms would be most acceptable to you:
1. failed with prejudice
2. pulled a Rammstein
3. luminesced
4. extra crispy capacitor action
5. boom-lights
6. Mt. St. Helens
7. Toxic bar-b-q
8. Extinguishment event
9. Unanticipated electron migration
10. Plasma and particulate incident
Here’s a couple more (added later)
Exothermically exceptional
Left the operating temperature range behind.
Added even yet later
(From a coworker)
Fire – unexpected rapid oxidation Smoke – airborne particulate release
Spark – corona discharge
Arc – see spark
Hope this helps
http://www.pmichaud.com/toast/
And yet more!!!!
Impersonated a dragon
Expressed it’s inner hotness
Achieved brilliance
and yet more still even!!!
1. exothermic event
2. mode transition
3. irreversible failure mode
4. undocumented functional shift
I’m fond of the unanticipated electron migration, myself.
None of the above come close to the F-word, but if I had to use one of the above I’d probably go with “Holy Mt. St. Helens”.
What’s your companies policy on customers who use the F-word while talking to someone (maybe you Allegra) in customer service?
Customers can do what they like. The rest of us gotta suck it up, buttercup.
How about a contained pyroclastic flow event, or an uncontrolled warming event?
Or a James Brownian motion?
Sandy, I laughed so hard when I read that I thought I’d choke on my salad. That’s the single funniest thing I’ve seen in ages.
mea culpa. That was a brain fart. The song is, of course, by Jerry Lee Lewis. Somehow his name doesn’t lend the same way to the topic at…er…hand
but james brown is HOT and brownian motion only takes place in a liquid, and if one of the product liquefies it would be … well, sahMOKin’ hot. I just got an avalanche of cultural hotness vibe and thought it was hilarious and deliberate. To your point though, we can either say that the unit has ‘married its cousin’ in reference to Jerry Lee, or say Great Balls of Euphemism! instead.
From the chemist’s standpoint, I believe it would be correct to say that “the unit has had an oxidative reaction.”