I’ve got rants in my pants

I called somebody out on using a gendered slur recently and he paused & adjusted his speech. Sometimes it’s that easy.  Now if I could just stop using my own slurs and replace them with something better.  I am in search of a few good words, to replace a few slur-ry ones.  I’m looking at YOU r-tarded and p-nsy, two words which shouldn’t even be coming into my mind, let alone leaving my mouth.  If the action is stupid, I’ll use ‘ill-considered’, and if the person is stupid to the point of being a threat to life, limb and body politic, ‘witless’.  P-nsy is more problematic.  I am thinking ‘mollescent’ or ‘mollusc’ or ‘spineless’, although if I use mollusc I am afraid the Old Ones will cotch me.  I’m working on replacing “Thank G-d” with “Thankfulness!” and I’m already well into replacing the exclamations “C—-t!” and “J—s!” with “Darwin’s Beard!”


Published by


Born when atmospheric carbon was 316 PPM. Settled on MST country since 1997. Parent, grandparent.

2 thoughts on “I’ve got rants in my pants”

  1. I don’t care about the people I’m annoyed with, I care about the feelings of the people who are hurt by the words because they don’t like me making the assumption that calling somebody developmentally delayed or gay is bad. Neither of those human states are bad in and of themselves, so turning the words into slurs is mean.

    As for the witless molluscs, now and always, they can go fuck themselves. I think that’s still okay to say, and even if it isn’t there’s only so much personal growth I can handle in one day.

Leave a Reply