Destiel filk – Spread ’em up to Heaven

So Supernatural is a show that ran 15 LONG years, interrupted by the writers’ strike and the pandemic, and it introduced Destiel, the fan pairing of the characters of supernatural creature hunter Dean Winchester and the Seraph (always referred to as an angel) Castiel, played by Jensen Ackles and Misha Collins.

The chemistry was instant and obvious to most fans. The writers encouraged it over 11 seasons. There’s no reason to believe that a sexual relationship between the two was ever really contemplated, but a platonic relationship as committed and lasting as a marriage was MORE than hinted at, and I would have been happy with that, and in the end, the fans got fucking burned in a pile of queerbaiting exec notes. We got a love confession out of Castiel WHO PROMPTLY WENT TO THE BLACK EMPTINESS OF OBLIVION and nothing out of Dean, and I was so angry I didn’t watch the last episode, because I knew I’d be disappointed, and when I heard the shrieking of the fans, I knew I’d saved myself a lot of grief.

I believe, and it will never be proved, that they shitcanned anything the slightest bit gay out of Dean because the CW was rolling out a hypermasculinist cop show for Jared Padalecki and the execs didn’t want to piss off potential viewers. That show, a reboot of the ‘Walker’ franchise, has been renewed for a second season but it’s on shaky ground – a lot of the SPN fans I follow have no interest in it and its numbers aren’t great. It seems a shitty deal to me, but as long as ‘the right people’ are making money I guess I have nothing to add.

I’ve written about 400K  fanfic words in about 30 stories

and ten more in the hopper waiting to be finished/polished

some of the published stuff I’ve since deleted

for that particular pairing, and so

of course

could a song be far off? I wrote it before the last episode was in the can, and I’m sorry, because the execs fucked this one up hard. The fans didn’t get our HEA (Happy ever after)although the writers did their best.

I have many strong opinions, but since I mouth off about it almost daily, I put them on twitter, not here. Strongest opinion: leave the actors, their wives, friends, children and agents alone. I don’t want them to see my fanfic because that shit’s weird and scary for the actors; it’s not for them, it’s for me and about a thousand other fans, nobody else. Second: Jensen Ackles is a better actor than both Jared Padalecki and Misha Collins. Put together. Third: Dean was bisexual before Castiel showed up. I will fucking fight you over that, the textual and video evidence is compelling.

If you want to know my moniker on AO3 DM me. The genre is AU (alternate universe; same characters in different occupations, ages, etc) fluff, gay smut, domestic banter and the one time I actually did a supernatural destiel fanfic (I have since pulled it down, it got such terrible numbers, despite being fantastic, I got pissed and said yoink) it had little girl hunters who try to stab the King of Hell and magical fucking talking cats in it WHO ENDED UP EATING CROWLEY’S HELL HOUND so yeah, I try to stick to fluff, banter, communication, pining and smut, with HEA…. since that’s less realistic than magical cats. Also most of the time I don’t use OC (Original Characters…. you know, Mary Sue), I just repurpose the same 15 characters from the show over and over again in different ways.

Spread em up to Heaven

(Castiel is singing)

Angels in their true form are big and stern and feathered
to gaze upon one in this form makes humans come untethered
and gender’s not an issue (much) for Heaven’s fighting squad
Taking orders, smiting demons, ever faithful to my God who……
(brief pause to be very confused)
Then gave me Dean Winchester to reconstruct from Hell
God Spake: Start with his mouth! you’ll get to know it well!
And please don’t ever worry about anything I’m plannin’
Gay love saves the day you know, It’s ABSOLUTELY CANON

Heaven, Heaven, spread em up to Heaven
I’m going to spread my great big wings for you
Heaven, Heaven, spread em up to Heaven
I’m going to spread my wings for you
I bet you’ll like most everything they do

Interspecies romances are always such a trial
I don’t know just what to feel and Dean’s good with denial
And yes I worry constantly about what Chuck (note, aka ‘God’) may plan
And so should all of you till the very last episode’s in the can!

Heaven, Heaven, spread em up to Heaven
I’m going to spread my great big wings for you
Heaven, Heaven, spread em up to Heaven
I’m going to spread my wings for you
I bet you’ll like most everything they do



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Born when atmospheric carbon was 316 PPM. Settled on MST country since 1997. Parent, grandparent.

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