Tonight I did something I very rarely do. I watched a movie, by myself, all the way through.
I watched Just Like Heaven, with Reese Witherspoon and Mark Ruffalo, and I have to say I enjoyed it. I told a friend on the phone, “If you’re a straight guy, you should only watch this movie if you think it will give you better odds of getting laid. Otherwise, you should dodge this movie like a bad karate chop.”
My god, I watched a date movie all the way through and liked it. I’ll be wearing a tinfoil hat before this phase of my life is through, she opined gloomily.
Well, it is when someone starts wearing tinfoil underwear that you really have to start worrying. I had a couple as clients, including the one that shoplifted a dozen wieners and then ate them as he ran whilst being pursued by the police.
Didn’t you have a client try to run away with a couple of bags of quarters one time? And the cops laughed so hard they couldn’t cuff the guy?