We watched the Blackhawks-Canucks game on the big screen at work last night. It was fun, and the Canucks won 3 to 1.
I am taking the day off work. I can’t really concentrate, so I may as well stay home.
Month: May 2009
A long way down
I know I am moving and walking and talking, but there is a deep feeling in me that I’ve forgotten something. And then I’ll remember that John is dead. I make breakfast, and then run back to my computer to post another link I just remembered to add to his memorial site.
Juliana, his housemate for the last two years, sent me a very sweet message. I send you a hug, dear one. There will be a memorial service in Victoria as well; the folk musicians he played with there very much wish to celebrate his life, and I hope it’s a day I can go. There will likely be a memorial in Ontario too…. a lot of people knew him and loved him.
The only way I can properly memorialize him is by singing and playing more. And god almighty, I never felt less like doing it. Every time I look at my musical instruments, I flinch. No comfort there yet.
John Caspell memorial site has been switched live
something cute
Homily went well. I will post eventually. (it’s in homilies now) Tom and Peggy, bless them, invited me and Brooke and Paul and Keith over for lunch yesterday and we tried to lever ourselves out of our grief, which at times swamps us, with some planning. Paul and Keith came back here long enough for dinner and to distract ourselves with some tv and finally I collapsed into sleep. Now it is two in the morning and I know that if I don’t put down this computer right away I’m going to end up getting no more fracking sleep.
Miss Margot had one tiny matted bit in her fur and gummy eyes – which Keith took care of – but was otherwise unaffected by my absence.
We all have massive lists of things to do.
Despite it all
Life goes on. I have put the finishing touches on the homily and I will now be getting up and getting started on my day.
On the way home I said to Paul that I was not happy about spending the night away from him and Keith, so I’m at Planet Bachelor right now. Keith is struggling. There is so much that can’t be put into words, and he’s trying to make sense of it, something senseless and stupid. It’s so unfair.
Jim P is counselling us not to rush the memorial service. The dead stay dead, and the living need time to gather their resources to do a proper job of the memorial.
Sad and dreadful news
John Caspell, Paul’s younger brother, known on this blog as Dr. Filk, died today in hospital. Lady Miss B was in the room when they called the code. She called us to the hospital – where we had been planning to visit him this afternoon – but it was too late when we got there. We said our goodbyes.
All of us here are numb. Lady Miss B’s husband is about to pick her up and take her back to Vancouver; Paul and I and Keith have one more piece of business to attend to and then we’ll be going back on the 9 o’clock.
I am still giving the homily at church tomorrow but I think I will make room for people to say a few words about John, who was, after all, one of the more interesting, colourful and intelligent people most of us will ever have the chance to meet. It was a privilege to know him.
In Victoria
mOm and pOp have a full house so Keith, Paul and I are in a bed and breakfast about five minutes’ drive from their house. Sometime in the next half an hour I’m going to get up and abandon the joys of free wireless internet and get dressed and go downstairs to breakfast, which starts around 7:30. Then we’ll go visit Granny, and then the parents, and then Dr Filk.
Lady Miss Banjola, who is unabashedly anxious to speak to her long time musical partner and see for herself how he’s doing, joined us for the trip across the Strait (and dinner) last night. Dr. Filk’s accident aside she appears to be doing famously, and I look forward to her album release later this summer (details about the album and its acquisition will be posted at that time).
The B&B is a suburban house. I don’t know where this bed came from, but it’s the best bed for sleeping, both in terms of the pillows and the mattress, that I can recollect in many moons. My bed at home feels like a rock pile by comparison.
I think I’m getting an abscessed tooth. Grr.
I miss la Margot and Eddie and Gizmo.
I will report on Dr. Filk after I’ve seen him, but Pondside denizens report that the orthopod states that the foot operation went absolutely as well as could be hoped for the range of the injuries and the condition of the patient. Don’t know if it’s true, but that sure sounds hopeful. The drunk who t-boned him on his Burgmann has assumed 100% of the responsibility.
Looking forward to the homily tomorrow….
showjumping bunnies and bad nooz
With some irritation and dread, I must announce that Jeff and I will be finding new headquarters for Geek House in 60 days, that being the notice we were given by the landpeers. It’s been a great run, but now we must move…. We are trying to figure out what the hell we’re going to do next, but there’s no point looking hard for a place when nothing will be visible for another month, and although Jeff and I are still tracking a house purchase as a possible future outcome, house prices in Vancouver are still outrageously high for what you get.
And by contrast, bunnies.