Settler words&music in S'ólh Téméxw, (leanpub.com/upsun) living where privilege meets precarity in MST country. she/her/they———– Novels: Midnite Moving Co., Upsun; Sweep Off Those Waves coming soon, Hair Sinister after that. —Restore All Indigenous Lands!
I didn’t touch my mandolin all day yesterday.
Today we interview (how many real estate agents is this now?) yet another real estate agent who wants us to just ‘put it on the market and see who makes an offer’. This one is the spouse of one of Paul’s work colleagues.
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Allegra, I don’t know if this helps, but when we hire a professional (real estate agent, lawyer, house renovator, etc.), I go through the yellow pages and have a discussion over the phone with the person of interest (it’s really my preliminary interview), then I pick the top 3 to 6 (depending) and have them over to the house and let them talk and answer questions (I call this my actual interview with feedback from Jim and/or Jenn) — sometimes we go to their office. I find it usually becomes obvious who is going to work best with our family and afford us a degree of comfort.
Well, at this point I’d take a Real Estate agent in a thong who punctuates his sentences by hitting a pig’s bladder if Paul wanted to work with him. Still no word on whether Paul is going to re-fi or whether we will sell. I’m fine either way … and the rest of this sentence is deleted. Sigh.
Allegra, I DO NOT KNOW how you keep your cool! I swear if I were in your shoes, I’d make Paul regret the day he was born (and I am not kidding!) I would not be asking God to grant me any serenity!
I’m sorry your mandolin was lonely yesterday, but you should hit the delete button on guilt. I trust these issues will be resolved – soon.
It’s all good. I think that in Leslie we have found somebody we can both work with; she’s a very no bs kinda person and I found her both intelligent and personable. Also, we had been advised early in the process, “Get a real estate agent you don’t like so you don’t feel bad about telling them to giddyap.” But Paul and I both found this advice rather alienating and really were glad to agree on somebody we both like.
He just informed me that he’s not going to sign a listing until the separation agreement is done. Seeing as how he’s heading out of town until – effectively – Wednesday – this is going to add about six weeks to the process (if I’m lucky, because Paul right now is in zugzwang, and housing prices are dropping.
I’m glad you haven’t chosen someone you don’t like; as if the whole process isn’t challenging enough. When I went through my separation and divorce, I met with lots of roadblocks and the process of becoming financially disengaged seemed to take forever (actually 2 years for the separation agreement). However, there were plenty of people in my church support group that were at the 4 year mark and no end in sight. So, although it’s normal for these things to drag on, it doesn’t really make it any easier. Sorry this isn’t very concise, I’m really foggy right now (CFS, post-surgery, ???), but I’m hoping the best for you.
Hugs and hope you’re feeling bettah soon…. I should brace myself for 2 – 4 years? Thanks, that’s actually good advice. I will get into a calm place and try to stay there. You can’t hurry love, they say, and it’s starting to look like backing out again takes even longer!