All present, my grasp of invective
has got me in trouble, it’s true;
don’t be deterred, please take me at my word.
This song’s not directed at *you*.

Jackass and user and blockhead
Nimnul and ratfink and dolt
For personality, in your totality
brittle as Frankie’s neck bolt!

In past you have rendered me livid
And speechless with grief and with rage
In characterization vivid
Revenge has it’s way with the page!

My friends offer tea and assurance,
All persons have merit and worth!
But my thoughts are bloomin’ that you aren’t quite human
and ¦ possibly not of this earth.

I won’t deride your genitalia
I know your IQ isn’t low
But in other respects you’re a failure
I’m hoping you already know.

Were you at the roadside and bleeding
Of COURSE I would render you aid
But under friendslock O GOD how I would mock
you, and all the mess that you made.

I am not rational.  Clearly.
But this is just furious talk!
I’ll stick with Freud and when I am annoyed
hurl insults instead of a rock.

This is one of Shad’s favourites of mine. She of course knows the WHOLE story about how this song got wrote, so her liking it is just the sweetest little raspberry on the top of my scone. Aren’t you glad that this is not about anyone who reads my blog? Of course if the person I wrote this for does come across this, I have two additional words. Fuck you!

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Born when atmospheric carbon was 316 PPM. Settled on MST country since 1997. Parent, grandparent.

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