so many layers of wrongness

Take your kid to work day goes really wrong.

On the other hand, brute force and ugliness DOES work for some applications. Just ask any guy who fixes aircraft.

You’ve gotta be shittin’ me.  This is CANaDA? I just don’t remember Montreal being like this.  Trigger happy anti immigrant cops, sure, but this is ridiculous.  Okay, I’m definitely learning a cop brutality song. Pukka Orchestra’s Cherry Beach Express, here I come.

Barbecue and family ties

Jeff and Paul and the kids and I watched the season finale of CSI, and had a barbecue last night.  It was really great to get the ‘cue out again.  The back yard is still a disaster, but at least it’s flat again.  Paul and I went for a walk and saw some very remarkable houses. Broken marble floor tiles paving a back yard?  This is an odd neighbourhood, but very quiet, and Paul is appreciating peace and quiet right now.

I called Kim yesterday and the house in Burnaby is about 1 week from being  ready for occupancy. Katie’s coming over Monday to help me pack and clean things.

I am not exactly full of energy, but at least I’m not in lying around crying mode, and I consider that an improvement.  Spoke to Ruth last night.  She said a couple of things that broke my heart with pity, but I was expecting it.  Ruth and John had a very special sibling bond, and were always very loving and supportive to each other.  (Well, after they stopped living at home and being teenagers, and we all know what I mean by that.)  And he was her big brother.  I never had one… until John came along. I sure feel like I appreciate Jeff more all of a sudden; it’s showing it in any meaningful and constructive way that remains a challenge.

If there’s anything that can break your heart more than family, I don’t know what it is.

Gizmo went for a walk with Jeff and then decided he found something worth investigating and hasn’t come home yet.

old in laws / que l’on continue

Carrie called last night.  She’s way the hell and gone up in Telegraph Creek, but she’s going to try to make it to the memorial service.  She never got my email and found out from my blog (Gott in Himmel) and had basically been crying for days.    We were young and pretty together; our first children were born within three days of each other; we both loved John although we had damned strange ways of showing it sometimes.  Carrie was married to John for a couple of years and she did date him twice after they broke up.  I had issues with Carrie, sure, but that was a quarter century ago, and now we get along fine, and her last visit was delightful.  I know for a fact Paul would love to see her, or whatever emotion you can feel when you’re alternately numb, bleak and limitlessly sad.

Paul and I and the kids had supper together and then Paul and I just cried for a while.  Keith and Kate are both grieving in their own way but grimly sticking to their schoolwork.  Katie says she’ll be in better shape after the memorial… I hope so. Keith is talking to his dad about it, not me, which I think is a good thing.  There’s no timetable or cut sheet for grief.

I had John’s Fender resonator out of the case last night.  It was in tune… in E minor.

Paul is remembering that the last time he spent time with his brother they played guitars.  They hadn’t been alone together and playing guitars in more years than Paul could remember.

Kopper has a laugh

Kopper went to TO recently for a whirlwind weekend with one of her daughters.  Got together with Tammy for part of an evening, which makes me very happy, and shared this delicious bit of oops with me:  Mayday was playing on the cabin entertainment. She also got to ride in a limo and stay in a very nice hotel… best Mother’s Day in years I imagine. I liked my geeky Mom’s day just fine.

I have finally gotten a proper night of sleep but I am still messed up from crying off and on for the last two days.  My eyes feel gritty and my head feels like sensate bathroom tissue.