walked with Paul, fed him lunch

Then walked to and from the pharmacy to get my booster for COVID. Everything went very smooth. Stopped at the Liquor store that’s just opened up the street from the pharmacy and got Fat Tug and drank THREE of them and enjoyed that so much I picked up a guitar and started practicing afterwards.

Weather has been wonderful, smoke from fires variable, lower today.

Slept exceedingly well, woke up this morning with my arm sore af, (no surprise there, almost everyone reports it, and it’s sore right up to the side of my neck) but I can also tell that this will lift over the course of the day. And I walked a whole bunch more, on concrete, yesterday, so my legs and ankles are whining.

That picture of Neptune, whoooooeee.

Jeff is taking me to IHOP this morning.

Look what arrived in my mailbox this mornin’ SQUEE > Book*hug preview.

Russian women are being comforted regarding overseas vacations that they can now no longer take their husbands on, since men 18-60 are subject to an international travel ban, with the deathless advice “Swap him for your granny”.

They can ATTEMPT to mobilize 300K new recruits but since the Russian military has already demonstrated that it doesn’t have enough UNIFORMS, RIFLES, FOOD, FUEL AND AMMO for the men it’s already putting in harm’s way in Ukraine, I don’t know what will happen. Russian client states are getting restless; Azerbaijan has already started a brush fire war against Armenia. 300 people dead already, both sides pointing fingers for the continuous breaking of the cease fire.

A couple of kudos overnight, 160 hits on the new story.

many thoughts one result

Jeff is getting me breakfast today.

Yesterday I was not having a good day (mega understatement) and Katie swooped in, baby in tow (Alex was with his pop, who had a workplace injury (he is luckiernshit that he didn’t slice a tendon in his hand and it was his day anyway.) Suzanne came in her own car. Katie researched and located a breakfast/all day joint in Maple Ridge called Big Feast Bistro which serves gluten free. (Suzanne is celiac, which now means all her descendants have to be tested for it too.) She got the maple bacon french toast (gluten free) and Katie got the same thing non gluten free. I got the poached eggs on pulled pork and roasted yam hash (MUCH LOUD PRAISING OF GOD) and Ryker pulled his wonderbaby routine on ANYONE WHO WOULD MAKE EYE CONTACT. We were right next to the bathroom (Jeff knows what I’m like when the caffeine hits, although I was smart and just got tea) and the music wasn’t too loud and it was just wonderful.

THEN we went to Whonnock Beach which is absolutely beautiful and given that it was the Thursday before the LHW you’d think it would be jammed. WELL IT WASN’T. There were MAYBE thirty other families there. Nobody was yelling. It was almost beyond belief in how mellow it is. Babby crawled through sand, used his grandmas (genetically Suzanne isn’t but YOU TRY CONVINCING THEM of that) for furniture, fought his teething pain and sleep with equal facility and was in general our beautiful brown-eyed boy. (who stands two inches taller than babies the same age, he will be MONSTROUS Katie is literally saving money to feed him when he’s a teenager given how he eats now with a terrifying, catholic enthusiasm.) Halfway through an icecream truck with gluten free treats showed up. Shoulda seen Suzanne (her hair is pink right now, and god did she get ROASTED by her brotherinlaw at the property a few weeks back when she was the ONLY one of us getting harassed by wasps) book it to the ice cream truck and come back triumphant with her gluten free mango ice lolly.


Then I came home, ate the last of the meatball sub Jeff got me day before yesterday, watched a bunch of TV including the latest Shetland, and found out that there’s a prequel series to Mystery Road available and watched the first one of that. It’s beautifully shot.

Still can’t get the alien from ‘Nope’ out of my mind. It’s a shape changer and some of its morphs are crazy beautiful. Also scary af.

I am in a much better mood but when I consider how much work I have to do to get my goods whittled down to a single room in size…. I clench.

Made a snarky remark on a post on Twitter day before yesterday. The s/o of the person I critiqued presented an extremely well reasoned request to kill that remark, so I did. Social media is not making me a better person except perhaps by accident.

Took the RAADS self test – 75 score. Test is at the bottom, here, but read the blurbs first. For autistics by autistics.


The ‘many thoughts one result’ = blank stare.


what a day

Spoke to both of my former sisters-in-law regarding Paul’s medical situation. Lois had to call back and then we had quite the earflapping. Ruth was as smart and kind as I remember her. Terry, may he receive his recompense, had already told both of them what was going on, so they were not freaking out when I called.

Got Keith over here (for pay, expecting broke rellies to work for nothing is horky) to rip out as much of the deadly nightshade as possible (including the nightshade that was growing up into the air conditioner water outlet) while I mowed the lawn. Jeff, you need to buy some gas, cause all that’s left is in the lawnmower.

Got a splendidly indulgent supper delivered after a splendidly indulgent breakfast (I ordered two coffees just in case Keith wanted some later). SO MUCH FRUIT nom.

Tried to write. 2330 words.

Watched some more Sandman again.

I have a long list and no desire to do a damned thing about it

late post – sorry

Lovely visit with Alex yesterday, talked some more with Katie about her domestic situation, Keith is coming over today to help with the yard.

Ordered breakfast from Angelina’s this morning, a truly spectacular amount of self indulgence but I ordered zero meat and most of the fruit in their amazing fruit bowl is local.

Buster is very subdued, mewing in a sad way, but he’s definitely uninterested with ‘outside’ at the moment and requested that I re-lock the cat door after I opened it. I know that sounds insane since he can’t talk, but he stands in front of the unlocked catdoor and sort of nods once and walks away, then stands in the games room to show that he is *moving away from the door* and settles after the door is locked again.

No AC today until later, will probably only need it to dehumidify and cool a bit.

I got four hours of sleep. Didn’t get to sleep until 3:30 but another couple of rewatched episodes of Sandman and I finally got to lights out.

metformin, coffee and a short walk

The foregoing combination was poopulous.


Fortunately I had my grandson Alex with me (full of Tim Horton’s finest) and he said that there were no brown stains, so I made it home without public embarrassment, just that drawn face and awkward gait that accompanies an er accidental blowout. I’m only sharing this so my mOm can smile sadly and nod. Getting old BLOWS I tell ya. I knew better, and got coffee anyway. On the plus side, I managed to avoid pooping myself until AFTER I picked up the amlodipine at the drugstore. So I managed to run an errand AND poop myself this morning, go me…..


Did I ever tell you about the time I pooped my pants on the transit in Montreal? This would have been when I was in my thirties…. it’s a sad and smelly tale with a happy ending.

2238 words


JUST TO MAKE MYSELF FEEL BETTER, here are all the comments (all of them) for my “Accidental Mr. Right” destiel story. Look at all the strangers I made happy!

I really really liked it

This was…. everything :}

Another lovely story. Thank you for sharing.

This was absolutely fantastic. Xx

You made me cry

Amazing!!! This was fabulous and I plan on reading it again so that I can take it all in. I loved the internal monologue from both boys and I was ready to cry both when Cas went back to Georgia and when he came back to Dean. THAT SIGN AT THE AIRPORT!! Great job, thanks for sharing.


Your stories contain some of the absolute best banter I have ever read, ever. Coupled with the sweetness and cuddling and softness, the wit and cleverness works so, so well. One million kudos to you, lovely.

This was so good! I loved it.

Do you know how adorable this is?!?!?!?!? Do you?!?!?!? Because I loved every tooth-rotting fluffy moment of it, from the gorgeous start to the fantastic finish. This is the perfect combo of angst, thickheaded characters, fluff, and pure unadulterated love. I almost wish I could go back in time just to appreciate this from the very beginning.

Holy mother fucking shit. That was so BEAUTIFUL! Everything about it! Beautifully paced, beautifully written, beautifully characterised! I can’t get over it. So many moments made me gasp and made my heart flood with emotion! ‘The love of my life’ what a perfect realisation for the two of them! And it was truly written as a love story. I could see them truly being in love and not just ‘here’s two hot guys. Now they’re fucking!’ I can’t get over this. I’m going to reread it so much!

aaaaaaaa this was wonderful!!! I love the characterization!!!!

Very nice!

Those adorable dummies! Their banter is just perfect, especially at the diner at the beginning, comparing views on politics and sports and religion. I’d kill to write so well!

I loved this

This was very sweet. ??

whoever keeps trying to break into my blog

Jeff warned me. Lots of people are visiting, good luck with breaking things; Jeff is a prudent and cautious individual and this site is protected as well as one can thriftily make it.

Russian soldier says fuck it. When this link breaks, his name is Pavel Filatyev. He has both deserted and fled Russia.

2173 words

Katie messaged me yesterday afternoon asking if it would be inconvenient to get Alex to come over tonight for a sleepover and I’m like

Crying From Happiness GIFs | Tenor

She never tries to take advantage, what a kid.

Today, prescription refill by way of a walk before it gets too warm, then over to see the kids briefly to review the ‘family spreadsheet’ and talk about our feelings because hoo boy it’s been tough this week.

The beets Zanne bought for me in Cache Creek have been PROCESSED and are now resting comfortably in the fridge. Reminder to self: That first trip to the bathroom will scare you, BE PREPARED. I still owed her a bit of money from the trip but let me tell you, my outlay ended up being a couple of CBD gummies, a 3.5 g bag of weed and 120 dollars, and for that much fun (and such COMFORTABLE NIGHTS OF SLEEP) I would have paid MUCH MORE. And I got to drive into the sunset when the mountains faded into haze and it was like being suspended in a picture postcard for hours.

Zanne told me about tabby kittens ready to go, but no ‘new’ news on the kittens. And the poor queen (owned by an unhoused woman who lives in an underpass) is pregnant AGAIN. Woman doesn’t want to give them up but I’m going to show up with a bag of kitten kibble and a hundred dollars in small bills and ask nicely. If the fates are propitious I shall name her Sookie.

Trying to learn to get by without milk in a jug… I may be switching over to powdered and condensed. Right now there’s been no fresh milk in the house for a week.

Buster has returned from catting and got his brekkie.

There was an additional episode of Sandman that I was not aware of and it had, like, ROMANCE in it which was very attenuated but also very welcome. Tom Sturridge STARVED HIMSELF for the role, and in that first episode it’s obvious, he no longer looks like a healthy human being and you can see his face plump up over the course of the show as he puts maybe five pounds back on.

folks wandering up to Neil Gaiman and saying ‘I am absolutely not racist why did you cast Black and Desi actors in Sandman’ and him responding, ‘YOU – PERSONALLY – I DID IT TO PISS YOU OFF! – DIE MAD U SALTY BITCH’ is the shprinkles in my coffee this am.

No ac today, it’s not supposed to get warmer than 19. I’ll turn it on if I need to.

Alex Goat-Boy


Alex held a kid at the Country Bee

When Katie and I and her children went to Country Bee, it was with a message for the workers there that the parental dyad was feeling too punk to join us and that they knew the workers would be worried about them.

You would think this was unnecessary but IT WAS NOT. As soon as we mentioned to the sweet young grain goddess at the till that they weren’t up for it (not sick, just tired, like you’re allowed to be at however old I misremember them to be), another woman, older and shorter, popped out of the back like something in a TV show and loudly said, “I wondered.”

We had a brief but cheering conversation and then went outside to chase wall lizards, find peacock feathers and as you can see above, Alex got to hold a baby goat. It was amazing and Katie got pics.

Alex and a baby goat are centred in a picture, surrounded by goats

I love that little man so.

Katie got me a salted choco chip cookie and some iced tea, Alex got a honeybee cookie and preferred mine … I WARNED HIM. Ryker and Alex did well on the ferry wait given that it was a hot day and they were bored silly. pOp I managed to help Alex stave off the horrors of boredom in the the digital age with the


fanfare pls & ty


dear ones

Long … long talk with Paul yesterday about his life changes, and then home made sugar free iced tea, tuna salad and a small serving of chocolate ice cream for lunch.

Buster has been in a weird mood of late. He’s been asking for stuff at odd times of day, at times when there are other people in the house, which he very rarely does. Training or ‘sitting pretty’ for brushing usually takes place under specific circumstances or times of day. I think he’s got one hell of a furball parked up in there somewheres.

Watched 13 Lives – the dramatization of the rescue of the Thai soccer team from the cave. Viggo Mortenson is AMAZING. Colin Farrell quietly disappears into his role. Viggo embodies a highly intelligent, very autistic and brilliant technical diver; the script is fantastic. The Thai people and government aren’t represented as ‘needing rescuing’ they are ‘asking for assistance on something they don’t have the expertise for’ and the way people come together for the outcome is better than any fiction. Congrats Ron Howard on another great movie and RIP Saman Kunan and Beirut Pakbara the Thai Navy Seal divers who perished at the time of the rescue or afterward from an infection acquired during the rescue.

good day

28711 words, super productive day yesterday, fifteen hundred words. Brad got medical attention but they’re still exposed at the hospital and need to find a place to go to ground. I am currently engaged in a coin flip. Going to baba’s sweet shop? Calling Steve’s dad and asking him to collect his boy? Asking Nima to give over his Airbnb for a couple of days? something else?

Off to Caspell Junction tomorrow for supper to feast Keith for his birthday. I may or may not sponsor a clothes buying expedition after.


much foreshore

Foreshore Restaurant for breakfast w/ Jeff, Foreshore for walkies with Paul, then off to the weed store in New West for YES THEY HAD TRAINWRECK I’M SO HAPPY and also gummies, because I’m out. All in all a very nice day. Woods were full of birdsong and the weather is so splendid (and the sky so beautiful, filled with ripples of clouds) it’s just … lovely.

I complained about Beyoncé’s new video (to my friends on Social Media) having migraine/epilepsy triggering flashies. A technology journalist asked me to comment and I told her that it was my preference that affected Black people comment, I’ve said what I needed to say and don’t need to further grab the mic. Got my own platform (pat pat) right here.


Second last time I spoke to Katie on the phone she said could I please do something about Paul’s feet, so I took him out on the deck (it was GORGEOUS here yesterday, just a hint of the heat that will fell us on Friday) and trimmed his nails. We none of us bend all that well. I can still do my feet but it’s hard and I sort of have to wedge myself into the bathroom in a particular way so that if I have a fainting spell I won’t kill myself falling over.

Beforehand we went for a walk in Hilda “It Says I’m an Avenue but Actually I’m a Street” Park. We listened to the crows and talked to a nice lady and her easily perturbed pooch. And we actually talked about Paul’s medical condition like adults for the first time ever. This probably has something to do with how the kids lowered the boom this week. I told him that for his own longevity, comfort and safety, he should get a diagnosis. He’s unconvinced anything can help him. So I tried to be encouraging.

After the walk, he sat on the deck and I brought him sugar free home made iced tea (using the carton of Splenda I got from Mike) and a nourishing, light lunch. (Smoked salmon, red onion, capers and garlic cream cheese on sourdough muffin with a side of the last of the cole slaw.) THEN I did the feet. Anyway, I try to help look after him as best I can, and it will be easier when he stops pretending everything is fine.

Katie and Alex are going camping Canada Day weekend. Ryker will be with his dad. Ryker’s no longer eating at mom’s (it’s not a problem; there never was a child more interested in solids in the history of getting fed).

There’s other family news too but it’s not for public consumption. Age is reflective and brutal, should we live so long and have the brains to think with.

Got my bloodwork and my meds, thank you Jeff for the boost of energy required to do it. Jeff got us fish and chips for early supper and SO GOOD. I’m going to turn the leftover chips into Really Bad Poutine Imitation. Since I have neither gravy nor cheese curds.

mini trip

As a responsible adult I called Katie yesterday morning to let her know that Jeff and I were heading up the sea-to-sky highway to check out a provincial campground and park north of Squamish, to be back in the afternoon; I’d call her when we were home. In other words we drove all the way from Kikayt (New Westminster) southeast of K’emk’emeláy (‘place of maple trees’, aka Vancouver) all the way to Skwxwú7mesh Temíxw (Squamish Territory). The number seven or the special question mark is a glottal stop.

I had one job.

Only one job.

That was to tell Jeff when to turn off for Alice Lake. Could I? Did I? No. I didn’t see the sign until we were on it. Jeff turned around. There was a sign saying turnoff in one kilometre and we didn’t see the turn off. Going back north again from Squamish we saw TWO SIGNS for Alice Lake and finally managed the turn off. The campground itself is lovely, heavily treed and with two little beaches. Anyway, I marked the damned turnoff on the map with the kilometres and paid for Jeff’s gas (I hardly ever pay for gas, so I was due anyway).

It was a gorgeous trip, however brief, and if someone ever transcribed our joint running commentary from the dash cam we’d probably have to flee the province.

Jeff got us McDonald’s afterwards – I got my fries with no salt and they’re surprisingly good.

And I wrote a thousand words yesterday, 17865 is the count.

It was a good day.

that lentil soup is nommers

I’m going to make more soup today so I have instant meals when Leo and Linda come CHICKN BARELY! I meean, chicken barley.

This afternoon, me, Cindy (Hopes hopes) and Peggy will get together to sing and play PEGGY WILL BE HEFTING BASS I am so happy.

Leo and Linda have been to the mines at Britannia Bay – and I’ve been living here decades and never been, although Paul and the kids have.

Confidential to mOm I think I'm going to write a scene in which the wicket stepbro asks Omar if 'he's going to let her' (her being Blossom) 'get away with that' and he and Brad are going to slap each other laughing like frat boys and say NO YOU DON'T GET IT SHE'S THE BOSS and then she's going to say, in 'visiting professor' intonations "I THOUGHT WE WERE AN AUTONOMOUS COLLECTIVE" and they all lay about laughing. It's stupid but every time I imagine it I smile. I think I know how this is going to end now. The story logic is INEVITABLE.

I need another 15-20k to get there though. 15,302 is current count

I have achieved meds

F near died walking back – I was fine on the way there; it appears that 2 k with a solid hill component is too much for me at the moment because I had to pause, many times, on the way home.

Jeff restored my happiness by appearing with CUBAN LUNCH chocolate candies. These were a feature of my Ottawa Childhood™. Last time I saw one for sale was when I was still merrit to Paul and we were driving down the highway close to Brooks AB. Anyway a new company has started up manufacturing and they’re BETTER than I remember them so I’m really freaking happy about that.

For whatever reason I can’t get through on Peggy’s land line right now, although it appears to be working on her end. So I have to look up her cell number because I haven’t memorized it yet, or ever.

Just got an email from Mike – he’d lost his phone for a while and so apparently vanished from human ken.