the difference between bi and pan is the difference between people who define things and people who like a little ambiguity in the rumpus room
Today I was reminded that many many years ago I was the volunteer coordinator for childcare for a Toronto Pride, back in the 90s.
There’s a fight ‘in the community’ right now about Pride, all across the western world. Not so much in the parts of the world where being openly gay gets you beaten and murdered and being openly lesbian gets you ‘correctively’ raped. Anyway this first world fight is about ‘children at Pride’ and how a substantial minority of gay people who support Pride want the leather daddies and bondage enthusiasts and folks who whatever they sport amidships aren’t long on clothing to just…. cover up for Pride.
Now I think I established, with my childcare cred, that I do indeed care about children and want them to be safe while their parental units or some fraction thereof want to partay on the streets of the city; I also know that Pride started when among the most marginalized of the rainbow community, black transgender women, decided that they were tired of being subjected to raids and police harassment every fucking weekend, and started throwing bricks at the cops.
So for all the shrinking violets who have finished their days of LGBTQA+ activism and thus want all the rest of us to behave like tv housewives, this is le extended middle finger de moi.
For all the parents who want the leather daddies to cover up, fuck ya.
For all the parents who want to take their kids to pride, how about memorizing some easy answers about the costumes …. and lack of them?
The event is for ADULTS. Children are to be expected, and allowed for, and cared for in context of the parade and events, but they aren’t to be CATERED to. No more than the fucking cops or beer companies.
Having cops at Pride is bad. Having kids at pride is not. Having bigots try to tell activists how to dress is bad. Having bigots publicly struck hard in their rhetorical goolies is good.
The Asexual Visibility and Education Network defines an asexual as “someone who does not experience sexual attraction” and stated, “[a]nother small minority will think of themselves as asexual for a brief period of time while exploring and questioning their own sexuality” and that “[t]here is no litmus test to determine if someone is asexual. Asexuality is like any other identity – at its core, it’s just a word that people use to help figure themselves out. If at any point someone finds the word asexual useful to describe themselves, we encourage them to use it for as long as it makes sense to do so.” (From Wikipedia)
According to various surveys, some of which had quite large data sets, one person in a hundred never feels sexual attraction to anyone. Asexuals can have sex out of curiosity or to please a partner, so lack of sexual activity is not in itself the criterion. More info is here.
It’s interesting to compare and contrast (lightly) the doccos about Audrey Hepburn and Frank Zappa. Both of them were financed / directed / driven by surviving family members; both are … er …. hagiographic.
One can argue that Zappa is the greater artist, that he gave more to the world, but he was a raging dick, he hurt his wife and kids with his endless groupie groping and his ineffable attitude of perpetual superiority must have been absolutely hateful to live with.
Whereas Hepburn was a delightful actress who brought the things she’d survived into every role, and really I think the world’s happier for having had her in it. Was Zappa a genius? Arguably no; a fine technician yes, but he did not expand the limits of music, he merely explored them with more deftness than your average Frank. Was Hepburn a genius? Nope. but we love her anyway.
To change the subject. When your kid asks this question:
I almost misgendered one of my closest friends today, that was unpleasant.
I think this is my favourite picture of myself currently. You can actually tell my eyes are green. Why would it be one in which I’m wearing a false moustache? I don’t think I’m trans. I have actually thought about it, have thought about my relationship to my own body, my own gender, my own self-conception as a woman. I am very interested in trans issues, and have been for decades, but I’ve always felt quite comfy in this body, so no dysphoria, and no soul deep awareness of there being something misaligned between the frame and the spirit. I am repelled by the requirement for female bodies to wear certain kinds of clothes and makeup (for the convenience of men, and policed by other women BLEAUGH) and to be accoutred in very specific and specifically socially harmful, dangerous and infantilizing ways, so I’m a gender non-conformist. I might have thought I was non-binary at some point but not enough to have public opinions about it, or any ability to hold that idea in my mind as possibly true for longer than it took to acknowledge that as a cis white gal I really do have to question all this stuff since I may believe a bunch of colonial bullshit that just is not true. And no matter how hard I pull at the big ol rubber band known as reality I’m still a mostly straight cis white woman, coasting on my privileges to a strange old age.
I just backspaced over the next two sentences, and the world is a safer place. I have started taking a lot of hair off my face and I’m quite liking the results. I’m rounding out my hairline and keeping my eyebrows quite policed. Both men and women mess with their facial hair. Is it a gendered thing? oh yes.
Paul took me for a walk today and I got letters to Mary and Barry into the post, finally. Pork chomp and coleslaw and broccolini for dinner.
I am not Wilford Brimley
Allegra wisdom for the day “Peace of mind is harder to find than the outhouse on Gilligan’s Island.”
so Slider is okay with being called a demiboy, genderqueer, non-binary
sane people, pls leave – this is in response to Despair ep 18 of the last season of Supernatural.
Original creator of the show Eric Kripke (at least I think that’s who it is) with a rainbow flag and the word COPE:
backstory for the above, fans who only like the relationship between the two Winchester brothers are called bibros. Having Cas (canonically his name is CASS but that’s not what we do in fandom, ha ha) an actual life partner – potentially or otherwise – is making them lose their cheese.
Jesus Christ this above noted post made me laugh so fucking hard
the below-noted post IS IMMEDIATELY WHERE MY MIND WENT AFTER THE SHOW WAS OVER
Yeah NO SHIT, love this callback, although Dean didn’t actually get enough time to say anything
no, I really haven’t, because that’s the kind of love it is, and always has been represented that way, and fuck the haters
now in the fandom they’re saying destiel is what makes Putin resign, which when you consider HOW MANY RUSSIAN FANS THERE ARE is quite possibly the funniest thing about this tempest in a teacup
above is shown the catholic reaction….
LOLOLOL this was the Friday after the show/election
SPN fandom above is memeified in the Avengers universe. Cas disappears during the scene, but he’s already been resurrected three times, so…
I think @solarbirdy’s comments on the above noted complete lack of reaction are best, but she’s a filker so I won’t reproduce her speech without permission
In other words, this represents such an upgrade to the notion of queerbaiting they’ll have to throw out their previous thesis. Also, Tumblr as a social media platform was dying and the extra hits they got as a consequence of Supernatural 15/18 were substantial
Destiel fans often refer to themselves as clowns.
the above-noted isn’t exactly what happened either
nope, not this either and anyone who DOES expect skin should probably give their good ol’ head a shake. I want A HUG FOR THE BOYS that means a little more than the ones they’ve given each other so far.
EVERY G.D. WORD O’ THIS ABOVENOTED POST
LOOK UPON THE WOMAN WHO SAVED THE WORLD, now we have to survive the next two months OH PS SHE’S OUT ABOUT BEING A SUPERNATURAL FAN but we do not know how she feels about destiel and I would very much like to think that she STANS.
WELL I THOUGHT THAT WAS IT, BUT THERE’S ANOTHER CHASER FOR THAT SHOT
JESUS CHRIST, THIS FANDOM
It’ll be different in a year, no doubt
Men in Love — god they’re cute
rewatched Greyhound – this time with subtitles, which I recommend
Next week. Waiting is.
Here’s a list of gender neutral words, quite thought provoking and useful.
Here’s a list of words to clarify language around slavery.
Speaking of language, even Wikipedia has troubles with shitposts:
credit NASA, ESA, STScI, A. Simon (Goddard Space Flight Center), M.H. Wong (University of California, Berkeley), and the OPAL team
and speaking of shitposts, which we weren’t, right? right? Here’s a lovely hit to the face of christian witness:
I got ALEX FOR TWO HOURS
He was as good as gold. He whined at the very last minute when he realized his momma bear was going to leave and he wasn’t going to get Xenon HE LOVES XENON, but we made recordings and watched TV and I made him homemade choco milk and we laughed very very hard.
before we made new recordings we listened to all of the old ones, and Alex made some noises that were excruciatingly funny and the two of us nearly choked laughing.
And we have sourdough bread thanks to Katie so YES.
Weather was lovely yesterday, it’s overcast and cooler now, also good.
I got a couple more surfaces cleared off in the kitchen.
10322 on the fic
Wasp nest growing over yardlights.
SEE YOU IN HELL
above noted is the noted, feted and howlarious burlesque artiste Carrie Finnell. According to twitter’s @WhoresOfYore, “Carrie Finnell (1900-63) was a legend of burlesque. She had complete control of her pectoral muscles & could bounce her boobs out of her dress & move them independently of one another. She called her act ‘The Chestcapades’ & was once the highest paid burlesque act in America.”
Don’t say this isn’t an educational blog, and she’s only mentioned in Wikipedia as a member of the Mutual Burlesque Association, so don’t bother looking her up.
Kasia Babis drew this…. they’re throwing trans women into paddy wagons, preventing gay activists from talking to lawyers, and mass arresting them while taking them all to separate detention centres to exhaust their allies.