22 ways rapists hurt men

  1. They reduce the number of women interested in sex.  Then they blame women for not being available.  They drag you along for that ride.
  2. They damage women physically and sometimes give them long term health problems which your taxes help pay to ameliorate.
  3. They spread diseases.
  4. They make men who don’t rape look bad by association.
  5. They use men who don’t rape as camouflage.
  6. They can sometimes leave psychological damage resulting in some women have a hard time being open and honest about their sexuality.  Some women vomit, cry or go limp during consensual sex because they’ve been raped.  If they won’t tell you why, it can leave you devastated about your own sexuality.
  7. They are convinced that women deserve to be raped, and con younger men who look up to them into believing the same thing. That younger man could be you, your brother, your son.
  8. They mess with your reality, your life, your future and your trust by raping women you love and continuing to be your ‘friend’. THIS HAPPENS WAY MORE THAN MEN REALIZE.
  9. They are the men who invented the friendzone, and try to convince you that the way out of the friendzone is rape.
  10. They tell women you love that no-one will believe them as they rape them, with the end result that the women you love will lie to you about what’s happened to them, by omission.
  11. They hurt people and spread the blame across all men.
  12. They expect you to stick up for them if they are caught.
  13. They trick you into agreeing if they say she deserved it, so you can be reduced to their level of selfishness.
  14. They gloss over how much of rape is rape PLUS child abuse PLUS mental cruelty PLUS messing over the reproductive futures of the women they rape, and possibly, as a consequence, you.
  15. They honestly believe that what they are doing is merely ‘having sex’, ‘getting laid’; their inability to feel remorse or consequences mars the relationships between and among men.
  16. They prop up the notion that sex is something women have that men want, rather than sex being a continuum of desire / consent / ability / availability.
  17. They misuse science to prop up their belief systems and turn up the volume when they are repeatedly proven wrong, to the point that any evidence that rape is not a ‘natural state of affairs’ gets shouted down.
  18. They turn men who don’t rape into faceless villains.  It’s hard to be the hero in your own life when you’re the bad guy in literally thousands of other lives.
  19. They kill the ability to be sexually spontaneous in some women, one of whom may end up being your partner.
  20. They rape your sisters, daughters, mothers and friends.
  21. They kill discourse by threatening rape to women who say things that irritate or refute them.
  22. They make it possible for human trafficking for sexual slavery to occur by making rape part of the breaking in process, hurting every close family member of the victim.

Do you have an Alignment?

Take the test.

My results. Weird, huh?

You are 25% Good.
You are 23.1% Lawful.

Alignment: True Neutral

You do whatever seems like a good idea at the time. You don’t feel any strong inclination towards good vs. evil or law vs. chaos. Some may say that you lack conviction, while others might admire you for your capability of remaining unbiased. You likely prefer good versus evil in society, since good people tend to make better neighbors and rulers, but you are not personally committed to upholding good in any abstract or universal way.
You are the stereotypical “Balancer.” You act in a way that is natural to you without prejudice or compulsion.
Examples of charactersand people who fit into the same alignment as you include Linus Torvalds, Dr. Strangelove, Scott Evil, Mr. Spock, and the nation of Switzerland.

Yay, writing again!

The folks haven’t contacted me about the job I applied for – they wanted my availability for an interview and I guess are too busy to get back to me.  This seems to happen a lot. I hold my breath hoping for good news and don’t get any, and then all of a sudden I realize that I’m supposed to be writing.  Anyway, This Bit is working out well.

King Canute, your agent’s on the other line.

Filking tonight and giving Keith a ride to the ferry in the morning.  Then churchy stuff in the afternoon (another pointless workshop called Focusing on What’s Important, but hey, there will be food), and Water Ceremony on Sunday.  Apparently some money has fallen out of the sky for growth.  I think we should buy a yurt, decorate it loudly, and have church in a different location for a year to go out among the people.  Church in a yurt.  Beautiful. I think I wanna yurt.

Back to Michel and his bad stupid foolish holy crap day (writing).

Why I don’t date, part 49/b.

Guy responds to me liking his profile.  He comes clean about his weight.  I know that it’s a good thing he’s done this and praise his honesty.  I ask him how his feet are and never hear from him again.  All I wanted to do was find out if he can walk half a kilometre on level ground unassisted, and I specifically said I don’t do hills.  I guess that was pushing too hard.

An old buddy

So someone from CDS days (we’re talking 2 decades – Dan) popped up and said hi.  He made the error of asking me about the novel and got about a days’ worth of blort.  Now I must cover up my shame in a nice big wordblanky.

Very much enjoying The Killing on Netflix.  Mireille Enos as Linden just doesn’t do any of that girly shit (and she’s small, freckled, not in the first flush of youth and doesn’t appear to use makeup or do more than brush her hair for work). We finished (heavy sigh) the Jeremy Brett Sherlock Holmes. It was really excellent, all 41 episodes.

Gangs of roving yeshiva students

Well, it’s one way to get a divorce.

Paul and Katie are going to come get me to go …. stroller shopping.  That money the fOlks gave me for just such a purpose will now be used….

I am feeling much better today.  I have apparently been shortlisted for a job, and am just waiting to hear back. Coconut oil is a healing balm.

Also, I made cake!

dreary day

I have slid into a very unfunky funk. I need to listen to loud rude music for a while. Or make some. Sandra asked me to write her a song, and that rocked me back on my heels as I am not feeling the writing part at all.

I’m having a physical problem right now which is NOT a topic for public conversation and I’m actually in quite a bit of discomfort. I should be better in a couple of days but right now I am in the sorry zone.

Or maybe I should fill in character sheets.

Pleasant visit

The visit with the fOlks was very good and we had a SPECTACULAR trip back.  The wind and the sun were in perfect proportion, and we got chocolate soft ice cream for a snack.  Thank you Paul for subsidizing that trip (pOp too….) and mOm for the baby stuffs. It was fun noodling around Victoria looking for baby stuffs.

Why I love Susan Sarandon. She just so effervescently and totally rocks.

Watched Boyhood.  I really enjoyed it, and then immediately read a black critic’s takedown of it and have to now file the movie under guilty pleasures.  Sigh. Jeff bailed partway through since various characters were being jerks.

Sahara Delights is now in the space Kitty Kate’s Cafe was in.

Went singing at Tom and Peggy’s last night.  The alto part for Word of God is wicked hard.

 

Katie coming by today

We’re going to hack away at the list of things to do for the garage sale.  It’s not to make money it’s to dejunk and declutter, as I brought way more stuff into this house than I should have.

Of possible interest to Jeff.   We finished the Chasing Shackleton series.  Even though you know how it comes out, it was still darned thrilling. Also of possible interest to Jeff.

Aw crap, Jack White’s coming to Burnaby and I’ll be out of town on the 28th.

 

 

Why I’m not in customer service any more

(To be read in the Comic Book Guy voice). (Re the failure of a login link on a retail site to look and feel correct – the response ).

Wow. We are sorry? You have multiple personality disorder? Weasel words, and rather rude ones at that, if you’re not actually suffering from a really awkward and debilitating mental disorder, in which case props for keeping the job. Or possibly you’re royalty, in which case it must a drag you’re having to slum it in a customer support job. Or possibly you did confer with another employee… at 1:52 in the morning.

Properly designed websites indicate when there’s a clickable field by switching from the ordinary cursor to a ‘little hand’. This doesn’t happen on your site. I scrolled over and clicked the red type a couple of times but I must not have been in EXACTLY the right location when I did. Your communiqué did direct me to a fix, and for that I thank you.

Please tell me that the “royal you” won’t just NOTE my ire (I thought I would blow a head valve at the use of the word ‘note’), but that you are going to COMMUNICATE it to somebody who can fix the website. Using Chrome on a Mac, the clickability of that link is not obvious and that is both a sales AND customer support issue since it helps the site shed money and makes irritable individuals like me contact customer support.

Now, rewrite that email so it’s not a passive-aggressive little screed and explain to me where you are on the planet that sending a customer an email at 1:52 in the morning is okay/normal, and why you’re working for a company that makes you do that. If you’re sending the email from a secret lair in orbit, cool.

Salmon for dinner again

Premade salad plus a big slab of the previously bbq’d salmon on a bed of baby spinach with mango salsa.  The new fish is in the freezer.

I’m in contact with an editor in Saanich and should meet her next week.

This data visualization of the earthquakes in Iceland is very interesting.

They just announced a dancing baby Groot doll, which is adorable.  Wish I could crochet, there’s an equally adorable pattern for it.

There were earthquakes in Chile and California and Turkey overnight.

Liberia’s health care system, never good after 14 years of civil war, has collapsed in the face of the Ebola crisis.  So many healthcare workers have died that even if the hospitals and clinics were open there’d be no caregivers. The official death toll is rising at the rate of about 15 per day with an upward trend, with about half of the reported cases resulting in death.  Even with Ebola if somebody keeps you hydrated and clean of your excreta you may survive.  You can’t find gloves; there’s civil unrest and food prices have jumped. WHO reports that since you can’t fly into West Africa any more it’s delaying the few health care professionals and supplies that are actually headed in the right direction.

Enough of that.

Now a couple of humorous safe for work pictures.

Looking for a wifi network?  

Something worn out?