Finally

The day is here for me to have my test. Whether I’m actually going to get it or not given the various fuckups is an interesting and as yet open question.

Read something on twitter this morning and I’m having to sit with my settler anger. Indigenous activist says that settlers ‘can’t decolonize anything’

and of course that’s why I have sixers do it.

Colonialism is a hell of a drug.

Someone I follow on twitter got a job. They’re the sole support for a disabled partner and I’ve already donated a few shekels to them so it is absolutely lovely news. Also, I’ve learned to hate the debt collection people in Austria thanks to them.

From @nelsonlflores on twitter

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I have returned from taking my test, I await with interest to see if I passed or failed, and I’m also having a colon cancer screening done this week but all I have to do is provide a teeny piece of poo for the health care system so I can manage that.

Did a small shop and some banking on the way home, and then took the bus; after all, it is international car free day.

much better aqi, all things considered

It’s dropped 20 points since 1 am (now 145 LATER AT 8:30 AM UP PAST 160 AGAIN), and should get within kissing distance of normal – under 40 – sometime by Friday.

Buster has been extremely variable about wanting to train. Some mornings he’s all over it, but the last couple of mornings he wants to just be handed treats, so I cut short the training this am after one treat and we’ll try again in the early afternoon. This morning first he huffed training and then he begged for it and we got three paw claps and a jump and chase and a run and chase in.

My experiment, stealing a cushion off one of the downstairs sofas and using it for a backboard, is a success – however finding a replacement pillow even at places like Bed Bath and Beyond that are supposed to specialize in shit like this has proven rather difficult. I will ask Paul to assist with cushion shopping today, then I can put the danged cushion back.

Jeff took me to breakfast at IHOP yesterday and I just ate what was left of the leftovers. We had the leftover sushi for supper last night as the folks kindly shared out leftovers from Paul’s bday.

Doctor’s office phoned me saying they wanted to schedule ‘a medical review with an RN’ and I told them to go fuck themselves until after the 22nd when I (hopefully) get my glucose tolerance test. What the hell is wrong with these people? Why do a medical review when the single most important piece of test data isn’t available? Anyway, I wasn’t as rude as I sound but I took no shit, I assure you.

The hot stone massage at Head to Toes day spa with Pauline was AMAZING, I’m still feeling comfort right into my bones.  I may book another one next month just to have something to look forward to. But I suppose I should probably wait at least that long to ensure I neither caught nor brought anything.

14,487

Review of day:

Didn’t drink enough water yesterday. It needs to be less than half tea, my liquid consumption. Did practice x 3 instruments; did walk 1.5 k, did empty the sink and fill the dishwasher; did not meditate or take my bp and pulseox; I did not work on a manuscript; I did take my pill and brush my hair and teeth; I did my shoulder exercises. No laundry yesterday or today; no osteofit, no dejunking yesterday.

french toast and bacon

Not exactly on the high blood pressure and kidney problems diet, but I will only have two pieces of bacon. In a few minutes we’ll take off for the store; Jeff will stay in the car and I’ll go do the shop, as per their current instructions – they only want one person per household…

Latest bp 157/87, not too bad. Nice walk back from the pharmacy yesterday – it was literally the only part of the day that wasn’t too smokey to be outside.

Two dozen deaths, minimum, from the wildfires, and it will be closer to a couple hundred by the time it’s all over.

I got 11/15 daily routine items taken care of yesterday, so even if I feel like I didn’t do much besides laze around and harvest squash (put them in a carryall LOL to carry them, otherwise you’re negotiating with a dozen verdant cannonballs) I did actually DO THINGS yesterday

et the littlest one last night as a bedtime snack, seeds and all, damn it was good

LATER ABOUT THE SQUASH two more of them found homes

13,359 words

The weeping and wailing about Supernatural ending continueth on twitter.

 

wringing sweat

Work’t in my garden. f’in hot out there. This involved sweeping up lawn clippings so you can actually see the walkways and driveway, watering the squash, (I could hear them slurping, it’s been ages and I think there may be a single lone pumpkin in the pile) and walking the boundaries to pick up the inevitable logo’ed paper and plastic trash that’s blown in. I also carted the cactus soil and the deck salt out to the locking side of the carport so they aren’t posing a tripping hazard by the back door any more..

Now to collect the clean mats from the dryer, except that I have to sweep the kitchen floor and mop it first, which I am now by the power of mental effort going to try to silently encourage Jeff to do.

later: Jeff did sweep but I hadn’t yet cleaned out the hellhole under the kitchen table, and now you can see all of the floor and it’s all clean, hallelujah. There’s a tiny bit of paper cruft to sort, but I could probably throw it all out and not lose anything. Also: cleaned the extraneous paper cruft from the side of the fridge.

and i am STILL WRINGIN’ SWEAT YEAH

Finally got hold of the doctor and gave her a piece of my mind, but of course it makes no difference. Managed to winkle out a prescription renewal. Why do we need gp’s again, blech.

I’ve already practiced three instruments and done my shoulder exercises this morning. I’ve even written a little. 13,301

u/Zinan took this flying out of YVR this am, check the haze effect on the mountains

ermagerd, somebody I really like on twitter retweeted something nasty I said about Trump and Nate Silver so I am ha ha’ing to myself.

The McDonald’s closest to my house has a worker sick with Covid.

fucking ronald damn his eyes

now it’s time to unionize

Jeff and I never go there, it’s the second worst Ratlands between the Port Mann Bridge and Main Station. (The worst one is right on Main. WHAT A ZOO)

I KNOW that none of you care, but today’s the last day on set for Supernatural after 15 seasons, and the people who guest star are openly weeping about it, and it’s a Thursday, and Castiel is the angel of Thursday, and now it’s over.

trying….

Something for the parents

fic 13,205 FINALLY managed to get through the scene at work. I think it will play most amusingly. Just imagine a guy getting his face teased off by two co-workers, that shouldn’t be too hard.

Trying something different with respect to a daily routine. Even half-assing it yesterday I was more productive that I normally am and scheduled a whole bunch of much needed self-care. All in all I am very pleased.

Made a small luncheon salad – chopped cooked chicken breast, lettuce, onion and olive.

Buster trained well yesterday.

Wanted to go walking with Paul today, but it will be a mall walk, if anything; the heat and the particulates make walking outside a mug’s game. So I emailed him and expect to hear from him midmorning.

I backed up my hard drive this week; Jeff thinks I should be scheduling it more like once a month than three times a year, and he’s right.

Spoke to Peggy on the phone yesterday. She was putting up pears and applesauce when I called; how very Peggy. We had a delightful chat although she definitely is not enjoying this phase of the pandemic, having school aged and toddler grandchildren.

Drone footage of San Francisco, with all the orange wildfires, is…. jeez am I wearing out ‘apocalyptic’ yet?

There aren’t enough public washrooms in Burnaby.

I’m out of bocconcini pearls and it’s making me crabby. SALT FREE CHEESE! ya-harri-hoy!!

They’ve torn down the last of the sets for Supernatural and Baby rides for the last time today.  Sigh. End of the show is coming.

Just told someone on AO3 not to give drunk people ibuprofen even in fanfic. I M BITCH, HEAR ME HOWL

Bed back together

I now have a fresh mattress on my bed. As I was putting the weighted blanket back in its cover, I became glad I have two covers thanks to the kids (they gave me an extra cover, I guess they know me or something) because the zipper broke on the winter-weight one. BUT I HAD A SPARE and carried on regardless. I’ll get the other one repaired.

I should call Burnaby pickup.

My west coast Indigenous style masks came. They look like this. and this. I was going to give the hummingbird one to mOm but I think I’m going to keep it, it’s fantastic, and I do love the other ones. And I is greedy. Anyway mOm if you do love the hummingbird one so much you have to have it, just make sure you wash it when I bring it o.O he he

 

I see from social media that cousin Alex is making a skirt for herself today, and as she wryly commented it was a better activity choice than doomscrolling through the news.

9859 10059 words on the fic

Weather continues unbelievably fine

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scanged from twitter

Some son of a seacook stole my bank card details so TD fraud prevention called me and cancelled it and I went in to the New West branch to get another one. Much standing in line, but they come out and bring the elderly into chairs, so that was okay. Picked up batteries for the D’Addario tuner Mike bought me at London Drugs. Also some thumb drives, the 64 gig ones were cheap like borscht.

Poked my head into the New Westminster Library; there’s this writer called Silvia Moreno-Garcia I follow on twitter (I almost met her in real life but she’s TOO GOOD for spits (dunnett events) so No) and she’s forever going on and on and fucking on about a book she wrote called Mexican Gothic, so I put it on hold at the library. I poked my head into Freshii and got a strawberry banana smoothie – delightful, rather small, and not too sweet – and picked up some plant trays for the seedlings I’m growing indoors and finally moved them to their permanent spot in the only remaining south facing window, the one under the cat tree.

Walked about 1.5 k in total, and now I am home. Stayed masked the whole time, took the bus into New West and wandered around. You are obliged to wear a mask on transit now.

trying to stay calm, focused and hydrated

Emptied and loaded the dishwasher, finished the first part of the poem about the bird. Considered banging my head against the wall; considered what it would look like if it stayed that way. Considered Jeff considering me with my head stuck in the wall: “well never mind that get me out of here” and discarded head-banging in its less figurative form as a pastime, at least for today.

I must now attend to the horny appendages at the ends of my legs at least twice a week or they get snarled in shit and cause no end of pain. Filed down to a dull roar?  I’m good. Bending is not good. But the outcome is good, and I have a shower stool.

Oh my god, for two seconds I thought that was Jeff humming but it’s power tools or a generator or something NO IT’S THE HARDWORKING GARBAGEMEN OF BURNABY (well I’ve never seen a lady garbageperson so no I don’t feel bad using sexist language about it to draw attention to that) and now I feel like my hearing is disappearing. Well, I guess I should score my tinnitus as super high today.

There, perhaps that’s enough whining. I heard Mike’s voice yesterday, he called, and he’s having a super rough time (work, isolation, life maintenance). He wants to see me but he says that if he ever got his parents sick he’d self-ignite from guilt and I totally get it. I keep working my way up to being mad about it but it’s

I could not love thee (Dear) so much, Lov’d I not Honour more.

all the way, unfortunately in this case. Filial piety has to count for something.

sleep sleep sleep

Got some bad news the other day and I’m still processing it, mostly by sleeping. I’ll comment publicly after I get the test results, probably a week at least. Side note to mOm, who will worry— it’s not that big a deal, I’m just easily crushed these days and once again I’ll be asked to change all of my eating habits, which I am seriously disinclined to do.

Can’t I just quietly die ? <—– what a wuss. And no, that’s just me being drama llama’s fave hanger-on.

 

Also, the fact that I’m getting this news a couple of months after I think I had COVID is really, really pissing me off. There are so many things we don’t know, but I won’t be a bit surprised if I’m not the only person this happened to, although proof will take years.

walk with Paul

We both wanted something fairly level and WE COULDN’T EVEN GET INTO THE FUCKING PARKING LOT FOR DEER LAKE PARK YESTERDAY

Drove by and there’s a bigass sign saying ‘PARKING LOT CLOSED’ and three non-masked non-social-distancing CoB employees flinging the sign around. I cursed quite a bit but what can you do, and I wasn’t trusting any of the pulloffs on Deer Lake Parkway – figuring for sure we’d get a ticket (meaning Paul would get a ticket) if I parked around the corner from the Willingdon and Deer Lake Parkway lot.

I drove (Paul lets me drive so I can stay current) to Robert Burnaby park instead and we walked around the ball park twice and then dropped me off back home.

I was, honestly, completely wiped afterward and literally slept for most of the day. Went to bed late, woke up at 5, feel super tacky and dehydrated so I should go take care of that.

Paul’s foot from when he hyperextended it is slowly healing.

I wore my mask (which I had washed, which I do every time I wear it) and Paul wore nothing.

Peggy says she may be ill with the thing, mildly, I really hope not.

AOC posted this on twitter this am

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Researcher finds that bad Phys Ed classes can ruin you for wanting to exercise for the rest of your life. My response on twitter:

I loved PE in public school, even though I was terrible at it, because I was kept engaged. Once I hit high school, I wanted to kill every PE teacher on earth and salt their graves.

Street sex worker talks about her job.

@_L1vY_ talks about (she’s a therapist) common symptoms under quarantine
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common sx
-Tiredness/Exhaustion
-Guilt (Esp: parents, productivity)
-Trouble saying ‘no’ to mtgs/interactions)
-Dissociation
-Hypervigilance
-Oversleep/Insomnia
-Forgetfulness/Loss of concentration
-DREAMS
She’s one of my fave people on twitter – humane, funny, despairing, a continuing thread of good sense and solid experience, also wackiness and perverse hope

16cm yup another six inches

that’s what’s forecast between now and Thursday night (it’s midnight Wednesday now.) We definitely need more salt,  but I’m not shovelling until 6 am. It’s East Burnaby so we’ll probably get 1.5 times the forecast.

mOm very kindly put cousin Laurel on the phone yesterday so I got to talk to her. There’s been a death on the inlaw side of the family and it coincided with the worst of the ferries and roads, so she’s had an adventure; this is also the week her husband turned seventy. Much sadness about the new normal. Supporting the recently bereaved is a beautiful challenge though.

Anyway, I woke up dizzy, a horrible feeling, got up and peed, sat up and now I don’t actually feel fine but I could probably go back to sleep. I should, I only got four and a half hours…. Read on line, I’m probably dehydrated or have low blood sugar…

No I did not go back to sleep I made coffee.

55073 HOTM

It’s been weeks, but every time I think about that piece of grafitti in Ultraviolet “Czirny fans get sick notes from their drug dealers” I crack up all over again. Czirny was a made up football team for Łódź which is pronounced wutsch.

View image on Twitter

the Duchess of Sussex is out and about – shown here at a women’s centre in Vancouver yesterday AND NOT WEARING A DRESS lawks

I MEAN IT’S WONDERFUL but TERRIBLE and EXPENSIVE like 10 million dollars of extra colonial expenditure and all we really care about in this household was her gig on the TV show Suits. I feel sorry for Harry, although not for his choice of bride.

Environment Canada says Howe Sound is going to get wind and snow something awful so it’s a good thing Laurel’s not travelling today.

 

HA HA HA HA STEFAN MOLYNEUX that unregenerate Nazi sockwad has been cut off from Mailchimp so his list of 70K asshole supporters is no longer his. LOLOLOLOL excuse me cough cough.

I sent mOm a couple of links about a former colleague….

LATER THAT MORNING

wanna drive?

Alex’ school’s closed. Katie is staying home. I did volunteer….

Later, around ten after seven

All the schools in the lower mainland are closed. There is not a snowball’s chance in a foundry that I could have made it to Victoria today without considerable horror.

Bad Poetry

Bad Poetry

After foreplay made of doggerel
Rhymes of death
There was a progression to free verse
And for two whole lines
Probably stolen, unawares
From someone else
The poet reached the empyrean
Domain of mediocrity
Before nodding off into a bowl of blancmange
And suffocating

I’m eating the blancmange.
One must grasp what one can
From a troubled world.

delightful

after a somewhat jostled trip downtown (travelling during rush hour being a real commitment for me these days) I joined Tammy for a lovely meal at Homer and then a wonderful walking tour of “Forbidden Vancouver” which Tammy also underwrote. I took the stool so I could sit down whenever; Tammy used it as well.

Nothing like standing at the epicentre of a race riot to help you get a grip on things.

After we hung out and I looked at pics of her vacays to places like New Orleans at Christmas (lovely light displays at night) and Fiji – my god, the guest house was set in a spectacular garden – and Sydney.

Then I went home, took a taxi from Edmonds.

And, apart from Jeff accompanying me on food to D Roti Shak, which supplied all of our meals yesterday, and a couple of shows I SLEPT ALL DAY YESTERDAY.

Katie’s here! Brekky time

 

Later – life sucks but I have friends and furthermore leftovers

Get enough sleep and it’s amazing

I am well rested, and in an hour or so will be off to the brekky place with Katie and possibly brO.

Mike’s at Trent’s ManCave™ finishing off the Mustang so he can get it back on the road. I was hoping to see him tomorrow but scuffed knuckles come first. He told me he bought a looper and now I’m mad chuffed to see it. His forearms were so sore they were in spasm the last time I saw him, poor guy.

Started watching the UK show Coroner, really liking it! the coroner/cop investigative team is very well done.

Some woman on reddit wants to know Am I The Asshole for breaking up with a man who admitted he had sex with sheep. My comment : How do you explain to a man with that kind of interior landscape that the real issue is not that he 3x interfered w/ sheep, (although “pick a gif for squick”), but that he doesn’t seem to understand the concept of informed consent, which would make any real life they had a mess.

If he was serious about never doing it again he shoulda kept his muttonhole shut.

I will try to work on Cuffs some more today but I need some kind of narrative hook that doesn’t involved 7 point fucking three billion dollars in money laundering. The fact that my novel has now collided with reality is fucking me up.

Was looking for a weapon from my Scythian heritage (the first blue eyed red heads!!!) and found this tasty store.

4800 words in one day

Which I can’t share, heavy sigh, although parts of it are quite hilarious.

Supposedly going to Victoria this weekend, I just… don’t want to move. Plus those fuckers at BC Ferries messed up the strakes on one of the Spirit class vessels and so the entire Van-Vic run is screwed up.

The scotch broom is blooming so my eyes are a scratchy mess of goo and debris.

I am not all right. I made the mistake of looking at job ads, and I can’t stop crying. Or maybe that’s my body trying to get the allergens out.

  1. I already applied to this job. They are going through candidates really fast. I don’t want to work there.
  2. I was going to apply to this job but they put something in the ad to make it obvious they want an attractive woman under 30.
  3. I was going to apply to this job but they said, “we treat people like family” and that’s FUCKING HORRIBLE under capitalism, financial and emotional exploitation no thanks
  4. This company is a known scam, I don’t even have to look it up.
  5. This company wants to pay the minimum wage to someone with 10 years’ experience.

I could go on.

But I won’t. I hate the fucking world right now, and it’s indifferent right back.