Author: Allegra

Born when atmospheric carbon was 316 PPM. Settled on MST country since 1997. Parent, grandparent.

gRR.

I thought I posted a whole bunch of funny links this morning and I bailed out of Firefox before I hit Publish.  Shakyfisty.

My daycard today was 0 – The Fool.  Gulp.

Mike and Heather came over last night for spaghetti / garlic bread / chocolate cake.  It was the first time I baked a cake since I moved in.  It wasn’t good cake, but it was better than nothing cake.  I am out of practice!

 

 

Bizaaaaarrre.

So instead of showing my transit pass when I got on the bus at the ungodly hour of 8:10 (am, on a Sunday morning? puhleeze) I had to pull out my mandolin and play it. I got through the first 3 verses of Buy Me A Beer before somebody else got on the bus.

Then, when I got to church, Tom got ‘that look’ in his eye and started playing “Buy me a Beer” so we ENDED UP SINGING IT in the ingathering at church, which still strikes me as being a “take your glasses off and clean them thoughtfully” moment. And I had banjo, twelve string, six string, piano, vocal AND stand up bass accompaniment. Long live the Masticating Ungulates! (The band formerly known as MU).

Very good to see Lady Miss Banjola on her pins agin. Afterwards, Dim Sum.

One of my friends, speaking to me on the phone the other night, said, “Well I know how you are from your blog, but how are you REALLY!?” You asked for it.

1. My back hurts all the time, but I don’t complain about it because it’s BORING.

2. I really wish I was having more sex with the people I want to be having sex with. Quality is not the issue. I don’t talk about that shit here – mostly because just reading this paragraph made my mother’s face screw up really hard. And Parental Strength Mental Bleach is v. difficult to find.

3. No matter how hard I try, I can’t forgive somebody I really shouldn’t be wasting any emotional time and space on. I will keep trying. It’s hard.

4. I wish someone would come along and kick my ass about my songs, as in getting them written down.

5. I need to eat more vegetables, and no, this does not loop back to item 2.

6. After years of being told I’m not a team player and that I’ve got problems with anger, I’ve learned that neither of those things are true. I’m actually a happy person; I rarely get angry about anything any more. Emotionally abusive relationships have subtle and lingering effects.

7. I know I have to lose weight for my health and longevity. It’s an ongoing irritant.

8. I haven’t had a cigarette in just over a week.

There’s more, but that hits the high notes.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to watch the “Happy Feet” part of King of Jazz again.

Off to church

The Masticating Ungulates are playing at church today, so I am going along.  Nobody will hear the mando over the bass and the banjo anyway (YYYYYYAAAAYYYY Lady Miss  Banjola is well enough to perform in public did I say Yay?).  Dr. Filk etcet. will be singing Jack Frost (swoon, it’s a favourite) and we’re going to sing “Absolutely Bonkers”

Rehearsal yesterday was fun and it sure was good to sing with Dr. Filk again.  I gave him a tip about writing Buffy filk (go to the canon and search on your character, and let the dialogue from the show write the lyrics!!) so I imagine his Anya tune will now come together much faster.  Although I didn’t apologize for the shit I’ve written about him on my blog, (Allegra sample lyric – I never say I’m sorry, I can’t make it convincing enough) I did take the worst of it down so anybody wandering across it for the first time won’t see it.  Lieber Gott…. look at the time, I’ve got a bus to catch.

3:10 to Yuma

Loved it.  Christian Bale and Russell Crowe are uniformly excellent.  The standout is Wild Assed Ben Foster, whose performance as the “I am utterly devoted to my boss who is secretly a homophobic asshole” Charlie Prince has to be seen to be believed. Intelligent, easily offended and crazier than a meth lab rat, his character is one of those “Yeah, those guys can act but I got the part of a lifetime and I’m chewing scenery with ruminant thoroughness and raptor speed” delineations that will never even make the list for best supporting, and will still have the power to crack people up 20 years from now.

I am assuming that director James Mangold had pretty much total control in terms of the casting.   Oh, what a great sociopath Russell Crowe as Ben Wade makes.  Slimy, charming even when you KNOW that’s he pulling it out for you, possessing lightning fast reflexes, an exceedingly well trained horse, the ability to immediately zero in on the most important part of the environment including sex when it affords itself, he has a lethally committed second in command and not a care in the world but the next theft.  And he’s ‘artistic’ don’t you know, he does heartfelt but not particularly skilled pencil sketches, and you see him first gazing upon a bird of prey. Oh, wow! Sub – til.

I have to go to bed.  Oh, Alan Tudyk plays the doctor.  Except he’s a vet.
I wish I’d seen the movie with Keith – we were both there but missed each other and Keith went home without seeing the movie.

Euphemisms for fire

From the Annals of Customer Service:

We are no longer allowed to use that unfortunate four letter f-word with respect to our products when communicating internally or externally in writing. It’s in all of the user guides, but we’re not allowed to use it…..

Please indicate which of the following euphemisms would be most acceptable to you:
1. failed with prejudice
2. pulled a Rammstein
3. luminesced
4. extra crispy capacitor action
5. boom-lights
6. Mt. St. Helens
7. Toxic bar-b-q
8. Extinguishment event
9. Unanticipated electron migration
10. Plasma and particulate incident
Here’s a couple more (added later)

Exothermically exceptional

Left the operating temperature range behind.

 

Added even yet later

(From a coworker)

Fire – unexpected rapid oxidation Smoke – airborne particulate release
Spark – corona discharge
Arc – see spark

  Hope this helps 
   

http://www.pmichaud.com/toast/

And yet more!!!!
Impersonated a dragon 
Expressed it’s inner hotness
Achieved brilliance 

and yet more still even!!!

1. exothermic event
2. mode transition
3. irreversible failure mode
4. undocumented functional shift