Month: August 2004

enough sleep

I can now post any picture and it automatically resizes. The ghost in the machine has spoken!

Things are cruising along nicely. I could complain, but who’s listening?

I had a really good email exchange with a customer a couple of days ago. I think most of my job is figuring out how smart the customer is and tailoring the response to his or her particular requirements. I wish I could be loving and tolerant toward stupid people – I’m working on it but it’s a hard, hard slog.

Pete Seeger quote on 12 string guitars…. “You spend half your time tuning, and half your time playing out of tune.”

how many times did I use enough sleep

enough sleep
2004-08-30— Posted by: allegra

Ah yes. There is a ghost in the machine, and his name is Glen. Some of you may be aware that the picture with the snake was the size of a dinner table; Glen held his peace for a couple of days and then without comment resized it.

The first time my website was live, it had nothing but a bunch of pornographic writing in it; that pesky spirit. I’m a pro porn feminist, so I was irritated without being scandalized. Most of my irritation came from a feeling I get rather more often than I ought, which is HEY I can do better than *that*.

People who know me know my flinching muscles work over time. I am an extremely tic’y kinda person, and I actually sat down and tried to review all of my personal tics, and I’m too smart to write the list down anywhere but it certainly got interesting before I lost track of how many I have. Then I reviewed a list of all the things that can happen during sex to make me completely reset to zero, and that made me want to phone Paul and apologize to him; I must be a sore trial to that man. Strangely he only really complains once in a long while. Really, the inside of my head never ceases to be of more fascination than television, lawn bowling (I typed blowing at first, and wish I’d left it that way) and everything else except the internet.

Pic is Paul’s.

enough sleep part the manyeth

enough sleep
2004-08-30— Posted by: allegra

Picture my astonishment (thus the blank) when we got home from singing and playing last night and Katie was already home, in fine form from another evening out taking pictures with her brand spanking new digital camera.

Another loverly evening at Tom and Peggy’s – this time I put a flea in Doug F.’s ear about how he should drag around his fiddle. And he did. Then he sang, to my astonishment, Willie’s Diamond Joe (he is apparently an avid Willie P Bennett fan) not knowing that I have worked up amazing harmonies to this tune – and I did not, as they say, hold back.

Paul did not play all that much but he says he had a grand time, and we’ll do it all again at our house on September the 19th. John was Mr. Entertainment AGAIN. And Keith did his Darwin’s version of Never Set the Cat on Fire, which was well received, and I sang C19H2802 and Paul sang Co-Pilot.

Last night I dreamed a snake started following Paul around (heeling like a dog), and we (a gang of people I know and don’t know) went to a retreat to think and write. It was set in a forest much like Cathedral Grove – that entish green filtered light. I also dreamed I descended a four storey metal-but-not-particularly-rickety ladder very very fast because I hate ladders and was trying to get it over with as soon as possible.

Tonight we’re taking Akiko to supper, Wednesday I go see Sally for my first Costume Consult and hopefully there will be some curriculum planning in the next week.

Sigh. Why can’t church just be FUN all the time?

nowhere close to enough sleep

2004-08-28— Posted by: allegra

Random pic, taken somewhere close to home (2019 edit – by katie, at the skate park on Sixth at Eighth.) Had a great time at Jim and Carol’s last night. Saw the Otto-man, Jerome, Megan & Jenna & Sergei, Tom U., Brian C, Chari (who was in fine form on the subject of marriage), Sarah & Ian, Jim and Carol of course and their neighbour Heather who’s just back from a year in Europe. Mike bailed, no reason given.

Today the board retreat – was supposed to provide coffee and I bought some but of course I am not a decaf drinker so I had to phone Michael and ask him to ask Elaine to pack some, as it doesn’t occur to me to purchase it, shudder. Decaf. I spit at decaf!

Katie was home before we were, phoned up asking plaintively where we were. Nice to have the shoe leather on other foot sez I. Keith is going to try to make the Saturday Karate class. And ask a girl out. Wish him luck.

I hate
2004-08-28— Posted by: allegra

animated smiley faces in business f*cking email correspondence!!! Jumping Jiminy Crickets but that p*sses me right off. I KNOW people mean well, but grrrrr ……

Lexi if you’re reading this the link to the parody of Never Set the Cat on Fire (and there was a guy convicted of that today, fancy that!? found at Fark.com) is at http://www.speakeasy.org/~mamandel/filks/Darwin.html. I laughed until I cried the first time I tried to sing my way through that. Keith is inordinately fond of it as well.

I experienced the embarrassment of having my clothing disassemble as I was coming down the stairs to lunch today. Of all the stupid days NOT to wear a bra, there I am, gone SPUNG into space so I have to skate off into the bathroom clutching my chest. Managed to fix my zipper but I’m scared to breathe now. Watch it happen again at the party tonight, but I’ll be two beers gone and find it amusing instead of paralyzing. Hey Mike! My clothing flew apart and you weren’t there! Just kidding. I suppose it could be worse, I could have done that in front of a bunch of investors. On the other hand… no, let’s NOT go there.

I did phone Katie (it’s an item of clothing she frequently wears) and politely ask her if she’d booby-trapped it. So to speak. Every word of this is true, I have witnesses. Unfortunately, they are all too traumatized to corrugate my story at the moment. (Roger Rabbit reference, that wasn’t a typo.)

Imagine a company

That has an accident between an aircraft and a truck on the ramp at a major international airport. The accident happened off an active runway while the aircraft was being towed. No idea what happened to the tow truck driver – he should have been disciplined at the very least, because he was going too fast. The tow bar snapped and sheared off the tow pin, then the aircraft (which didn’t have any fuel in it and was therefore light and ‘hoppy’) bounced into the air and came down on the truck in a variation of the ‘jackknife’ accident so well known to Canadian highway drivers. Since Canadians specialize in ‘expensive f*ckups that don’t kill anybody’ nobody was even injured.

Anyway, although I am not going to reproduce them here, out of respect for the lawyers at Air Canada, Paul was able to walk up to where the work was being done and take pictures. The guys are doing beautiful work on the belly skin (and a couple of structural members, alas), getting it fixed up again and back into service, and as they have nothing to be ashamed of I’m glad Paul got pix. I find it interesting that Paul is by no means the only person who’s wandered in there with a digital camera and absolutely no attempt has been made to stop him; he’s wearing the uniform and has the badge, so nobody said a thing.

Fed Mike

there’s a lot of beauty going begging

and a lot of sorrow going unassuaged

Anyway Mike was over for dinner last night. Fed him lasagna. Keith got his learners permit and went for his green belt grading yesterday AND he worked at Habitat for Humanity’s Re-store, so he had a day crowded with life and incident. Paul went to watch and take pictures with our NEW DIGITAL CAMERA and I should be posting pics but I’m feeling too lazy too find them. One of the girls at the grading patted Keith on the bum. I said in my understanding girls don’t look for excuses to touch boys they don’t like. Katie took some nice pix of Pokey but once again I’m feeling lazy. I took a picture of Cousin Itt, which is this weird thing around the corner from where I live and if I ever get a GOOD pic of Cousin Itt I’ll post it. Taking pictures is harder than it looks.

That time I reported a bus driver

Minister Katie Stein Sather had a letter published in the Sun today. My Katie disappeared with the new camera last night, prompting Paul to nearly blow a head valve, as they say, but of course she brought it home safe and sound, and loaded with pictures of her …. friends. Not much else to report.

later…..

I have come to regret ever volunteering for the youth program at church. My heart tells me I am still doing the right thing, but I look at this pile of well meaning literature (which has come to my hand like the dreck of ages as oozed by VERY Nice ‘n’ Earnest Humans) and have to suppress a shudder. I will do it their way because that’s what they’re expecting, but I think about the Correction that is coming and I have to suppress another form of nervous tremor, which is me envisioning a Unitarian Gun Club. I mean really, if you were cursed with an imagination that could think up the Unitarian Gun Club without suffering cranial herniation…….. I am a sad sad puppy, and need to think about other times, things and higher stuff.

I committed labour unrest the other day, by reporting a bus driver for using a cell phone – while manipulating the bus MY preciousss heinie was parked on. Under normal circumstances this would generate an unproductive but bilious fury. Under these circumstances, which I am about to relate, which I witnessed with my two (still barely functioning) eyes, which really happened to me and belong to me until my neurons part with them – under these circumstances I did not transform into a dove but into a f*cking stool pigeon. Dear friends, relations, neighbours and strangers, there was a family of FIVE GERMAN TOURISTS in the front, aged 15 to 50, the boy and girls as bleached and Teutonic and GORGEOUS as it is possible to get without lurching into parody, the parents trim, big featured and intelligent looking. The looks on their faces as they watched the driver answer his phone and then PULL OUT OF THE STATION should, by rights, have knocked the phone out of his hand and onto the street. Now even then, all my relations, I might have kept my little cheese-eating paws in my pockets and swallowed the river of molten lava/bile that was mounting in me like the cork pressure behind Krakatoa’s little urk, BUT he made a mistake. He WAS TALKING ABOUT HOW MUCH HE WAS GOING TO MAKE ON OVERTIME as he was on the phone. What’s a good citizen to do? Of course I ratted him out. Three f*cking strikes baby.

As the Bible says, a puppy will go back to its puke (okay, I’m paraphrasing, but not by much) I will go back into the mopes and wails of my life, telling them over like a rosary made of fossilized porcupine sh*t, ever so tactile. I guess the thing that makes me saddest (or maybe sadist, they’re pronounced the same way in my dialect) is thinking that teaching these kids peace love and understanding is not really gonna help them that much when the crap hits the fan. So I am not really inclined to teach principals that won’t keep you alive when evil men pack weapons, but I know that I must or abandon the post.

It says that a youth advisor must be drug free. I happen to really like beer, although I don’t imagine that I’ll drink that much around.

As a Canadian woman, I would be a fool, and the worst kind of feminist (in other words, impractical in my understanding of human nature) not to acknowledge the role that many thousands of Canadian men and women played in giving me the life I have today by valiantly parting with life in local and foreign wars on behalf of my ancestors, and the ancestors of the governors of my part of the world. I don’t believe for two seconds that anybody deserved to die in the conflicts of this last or any other century (okay Ceaucescu), but democracy is worth dying for (the ideal, not the nation state), if only because it seems the single chance for the improvement of self government.

Okay the boys are back from F 9/11 so I guess I’d better get away from the computer. I still think I’d like to teach UU Youth to blow things up, but I’ll have a hard time getting THAT on the curriculum.

here come a twister

Tornado Pictures, All Rights Reserved, Scott Newton, 2004 (Permission to use pictures granted. Please give attribution to Scott Newton)

This is the highest twister ever recorded in the continental US (taken at Rockwell Pass in Sequoia National Park, ABOVE 3500 feet). The streaks are hail. Much thanks to Scott for specifically allowing reprint with attribution. The rest of the pics are pretty amazing too. Please do not forward pic without attribution.

You gotta admit, digital photography really rocks. The hail was alley-sized and fell for – get this – an HOUR.

Finally finished my cloak.

teenangst infestation

not enough sleep
2004-08-21— Posted by: allegra

Well you can tell Katie’s back in town. At 10:30 JJ and Billy showed up with Natasha and two other boys and started verbally abusing her – Natasha not bothering to say a thing in her defence all the while – so she left for the skate park, shrugging and ignoring them. Fifteen minutes later they are still – all five of them, standing in easy earshot and yelling and carrying on so I asked them to kindly move along so I could sleep, no doubt getting sworn sotto voce at as they immediately and without demur walked away.

At 11:37 pm – Jesus – every light in the house was off do you suppose this kid could have collected a clue, some knob bangs on the door and rings the doorbell twice yelling for Katie. I didn’t even bother going down to the f*cking door, I just yelled at him from the sun room that Katie was not there and it was a little late, didn’t he think, to be disturbing people who have to be a work at 7 a f*cking m in the morning the next day? He apologized and skated off. Have no idea when Katie got home from the skate park but her shoes are here and her door is closed.

Keith appears to have had a wonderful trip and was very pleased that the Frank magazine was here when he got home.

In retrospect I look like a terrible parent

today’s mgmt tip
2004-08-19— Posted by: allegra

Suck UP. Bite DOWN.

Little furry animals
2004-08-19— Posted by: allegra

Winkie and Spud.

As you can see, the phrase ‘they get along as well as a dog and a cat’ really depends on the critters involved.

These animals own Mike, and crew-ell-eee force him to toil in the salt mines to buy them treats and keep them in luxurious (and remarkably work-free) accommodations. Winkie has very nice markings, in my opinion, a long and slender tail, and a one man cat kind of disposition. Spud is more of an obsession than a dog. Bone idle and a suck for attention, she coasts through life on her sunny personality.

nowhere close to enough sleep
2004-08-19— Posted by: allegra

In the words of the immortal Martha Ballard, my comforters are much as Job’s were.

My initial hunch that I would be better off not calling any of my friends about what’s going on right now was borne out; fortunately my family is being a lot more sensible about it. Nobody else believes – or appears to believe – that Katie will smarten up while she’s living with me; my loosey-goosey style of parenting would likely prevent this from happening. I go through phases when I want to kick her out, but they don’t last. I should steel my spine and just say, you don’t respect me, out you go. “She needs to go to someplace with a LOT of rules.” “You’ve done your best, it’s time to get out of the situation.” It’s like I’m the only person who believes she’ll smarten up, and I’m being gently rebuked for thinking so. The alternative, according to my friends, is that she’s going to end up dead, hard drug addicted or on the street selling herself or some dreadful combo thereof. Katie, if you’re reading this can you email (names deleted but available on request) and let them know that these – while interesting and dramatic life experiences – aren’t in your immediate plans? You might want to add something about how you have two parents, as well…. I mean, if you want to.

Interesting dreams. In one, Peter and Cheryl announced that they were going back to South Africa (and a very DIFFERENT lunch bunch all screamed about it, going on at length at what a bad idea it was (there were a bunch of people there, but it wasn’t my usual lunch bunch from work)). But they were adamant. That’s bloody weird, cause I can’t imagine them doing that except to visit.

Next, I was molested by forest trolls (picture the Egyptian god Bes except green and furry and two feet tall) and gotten beaten until I couldn’t see when I was spirited enough to bite one.

Then I was watching a giant picking up two little people, howling at them, “I’ll grind your bones to make my bread” at which point one said, “How unsavory!” and the other said, “How un …. sanitary!” Where’d that come from? Paul thinks he knows, see below. Also in other news from dreamland, Glen and I worked at the same place and seven people were laid off and we were both on notice that we were next and Glen said, “You’d better get your resume up to date!”

Then I had to fill out customs papers on a Hungarian typewriter. From the script of Starman “Weird you want, weird you get.” But I swear, officer, I did NOT melt that man’s lugwrench.

Snap back to reality, drum roll please. Paul was dreading going into work this morning, and rightly so. Air Canada skated out of bankruptcy by renegotiating all the union deals, all the deals with suppliers and creditors (same thing) and of course it made a deal with Cara. People on the bottom of the Cara Foods organization do NOT make what I consider a living wage (specially in THIS burg). Air Canada wrung concessions from Cara and then Cara blithely asked some very poorly paid, mostly immigrant, sandwich cutters and food preparers, if they could offer up some bone mass for the next Air Canada passengers’ meal in the form of wage concessions. I know that conservatives will argue that there is no moral difference between getting a 5% concession out of a regional pilot who makes 70K a year and getting a 5% concession out of a sandwich cutter who makes 20K a year, (and the market will reward sandwich cutters who improve their educations, etc.) but conservatism aside, there’s a practical difference. Full marks if you spot it. Anyway, Paul, who has already had his pay packet lightened by some hundreds of dollars a month (and is content to keep still for it if he keeps his job, true so far, and the management quits p*ssing away money on paint jobs and VPs of French Communication, which so far is not true – 27 VP’s for a company in bankruptcy protection???? I prob’ly don’t have the number right but Paul hauled out the org chart a while ago and we reviewed it with bile, liberally mixed with disbelieving fury), is furious on behalf of the Cara employees. He is so upset that I can’t repeat what he said because it’s the kind of things that makes lawyers turn green, then slowly flush. Anyway, Cara is on strike effective today, so I’m sure the food purveyors in the airports will be smart enough to make bag lunches for the masses – or will they? Capitalism is not as quick off the mark as everybody says it is. Sorry I’m writing so parenthetically, I’ve got a mind like a trash compactor.

I went over to Hank and Margaret’s last night. Terence was utterly charming – he kept running up to me and patting my leg and then running away. I collected ‘the story so far’ of the youth curriculum and at least we got that out of their basement – and into our front room. Paul grumbling throughout.

I have to confirm if it’s circle tonight and then we pick up the kids tomorrow. Another grisly day awaits. Okay, it isn’t grisly, I’m just spoiled. And seeing as how I’ve gone off, maybe it’s time for a shower.

marmots via Jerome

marmot sighted
2004-08-18— Posted by: allegra

Head for the hills! Provided by Brother Jerome, taken at Garibaldi. PLEASE SEND FURRY ANIMAL PICTURES, especially if they are digital, reasonably detailed or have a good story connected with them. This means you, Glen and LJ!.

I will have to make a second post for the second picture as you can’t post more than one picture at a time in a single post with this software.

marmot sighted
2004-08-18— Posted by: allegra

Head for the hills! Provided by Brother Jerome, taken at Garibaldi. PLEASE SEND FURRY ANIMAL PICTURES, especially if they are digital, reasonably detailed or have a good story connected with them. This means you, Glen and LJ!.

I will have to make a second post for the second picture as you can’t post more than one picture at a time in a single post with this software.

not enough sleep
2004-08-18— Posted by: allegra

Have confirmed that both of the kids are coming home on Friday night. I am just dazzled at the email I got from Keith. Apart from the one typo (and hell, I’ve made some dandies) it was a masterpiece; entertaining, informative, well constructed and droll as all get out. He really didn’t sound like an 18 year old man except in his enthusiasms. (Boys and toys). Anyway, he actually did get to shoot at things and is claiming good accuracy. (I’m a pretty boy! I’m a bright boy! – which is actually a quote from Frank Magazine which Keith and I use all the time – the follow up is a dour “Please! Silent affirmations!!)).

Glen is trying to get me to use wordpress which will make this site a lot more interactive, but I am being somewhat Luddite and having problems with the back end. I mean I log on and look at things but I don’t really know how to do stuff, so I think I’m going to have to admit my ignorance and get some coaching. I did download it and the documentation looks really good.

Various people I’ve lit virtual candles for are doing better, so that’s a bonus. Anyway, if I’m going to make the bus I’d better assemble my feces and fly. Completely inadequate in the sleep department. My eyes are squeaking again and I’m yawning convulsively and repeatedly.

Was very pleased to hear that Meg the Temp is going to be with us until September. The department she’s going into is short staffed. I would run out of adjectives to describe how badly.

Raillery
2004-08-18— Posted by: allegra

Pictured is the newest bird, the Calayan Rail. Locals call it a piding. I have to ask, how the hell did the wildlife biologists miss a bird that’s wearing conspicuity garments? Native to the Philippines but not for long, apparently. They found it while it was on the verge of extinction.

John Kerry dream

Last night I dreamed that John Kerry, with a straight face, offered to be p*ss tested, and asked that his worthy opponent do the same. I woke up chuckling. I’m sure the Repulsigans would just love that. “I’m sorry, John, but the President’s urine is none of your concern.” “How dare he make the president’s urine an election issue?” While all the Dem pundits go, “Of course he’s refusing, let’s speculate on what he has to hide!!!”

Watched the Michael Moschen tape again last night. It’s on its last legs. Ma, if you’re reading this can you ask pOp if he would be so kind as to rip me one (if you folks still have the original)? The only way we could watch it was if Keith rested his heel on top of the VCR to keep the tape stuffed a little further down into the track. Otherwise I’m going to have to go on ebay and see if somebody can’t sell me a copy. I’m also looking for a copy of Blown Sideways through Life; if anybody has one I’ll gladly pay for one.

I just made peach duff and I’m going to leave you soon to go consume it. Then shower, off to the down town church to return the labyrinth, then off to Stef’s bar b q and then we’ll figure out what else to do depending on the weather. Dave D (2019 edit not my poetical friend, a coworker) is getting married today. I really hope the weather cooperates a bit more.

Dropped 417 dollars at the vet’s yesterday. Another 800 waiting in the wings – as suspected Zeek!’s teeth are bothering him. Kira apparently has asthma, which I don’t believe for a minute. I figure as soon as she has some of her other health problems cleared up (and the vet said she was an amazingly fit cat all things considered) she’ll quite horking every evening. Considering we’ve never spent a nickel on them except for shots and food, and we’ve had them six years, we can’t complain…. we just have to amortize the cost….. Kira was an angel at the vet… Zeek! does NOT do pills. He bites and wiggles like a snake.