Today will be laundry and throwing things out.

Yesterday I fell, hard, on the front walkway, so did Katie when she came to rescue me. After recovering our breath we continued on to de Dutch and had brekky.  (I had the bacon onions apple cinnamon pannekoek.)

This morning I’m a little stiff, but I essentially landed all my weight on the fat pad of my dowager’s hump and didn’t even bang my head, so here’s to me not twisting as I fell.

Jeff took care of the salting, after. He said the onset of black ice was so subtle it was no surprise I went flying.

Practiced the valentine for muscae song and all six verses of Alexios this morning.

A call, and my response

Man posts lists of 125 deal breakers on a dating site.

There’s nothing wrong with asking for what you want, but he isn’t actually asking for what he wants. He is listing, with brutal clarity, all the reasons his relationships ain’t been so swell so far. He’s also saying, not in so many words, that despite his youth, he is frozen in his conception of himself. He’s also saying, not in so many words, that he wants someone he’ll never argue with because she comes pre-loaded with all the things he THINKS he wants. And wouldn’t you just know it, what you want and and what you think you want and what you think you should want are not all the same thing. I can’t do anything but feel sorry for him; his self-conception is a tragedy, and his inability to understand how his list of demands might be seen is a farce.

Explain to me why….

Keystone XL needs to run a pipeline through my city when we’ll be able to make fuel from algae?

This is funny even though the circumstances are not?  (Kingston fire picture).

Sabotaging birth control isn’t already a crime in the US?  It’s certainly a whopping great tort, even if there’s no criminal law on the books….

Anybody is surprised fewer kids are driving?  Between making a conscious decision not to contribute to pollution and the crappy economy, it all makes sense to me.  Both of my kids were well into their 20’s before they even started learning how, whereas I was 17 and wild to have my license.

Anybody wants to argue about what colour Santa is (when he’s an imaginary figure largely promoted by the Coca-Cola company) Link goes to retro Afro American Christmas cards, some of which are the ‘essence’ of charming.

When I no longer have a car, I can finally get a decal which adequately represents my tribble of a cat?

Science news keeps saying that a new species has been ‘discovered’ when the indigenous population knew they were there the whole time?  This is really annoying; saying it’s received a Latin name is different than “New Discovery.”

I didn’t know that Diana Cooper once referred to Winston Churchill as looking like the good little pig who built his house of bricks?

This is even a thing?  (Fundraiser to make a headset that reads dog thoughts which sounds like BS as yet).

Losing three traffic wardens causes chaos in Aberystwyth? It reads like an Onion article.

More judges don’t use their hearts as well as their brains in sentencing?

I didn’t start watching Call the Midwife until yesterday?


oh my learning curve

Right now the shop smells like a combination latrine and abattoir (oh, THAT’S attRACtive) because I, like the fool I am, scheduled the grease trap cleaning during hours of operation.  Katie took off to render care for her bff and I am here in a stench that usually precedes the advent of a horde of orcs, or perhaps several large trolls. Or I could say that it smells like what happens when Jeff leaps to his feet and says “Mr Toilet you’ve been very bad.”…. but that would just be wrong, because on the worst day he ever had he never smelled anything like this.

Ha ha, I asked Jeff to forward the instructions so mOm and pOp can watch us on the security cams.  Isn’t that hilarious?  At least we don’t have smellovision yet, because pOp would be bolting for the nearest door, eyes out on stalks, if he came anywhere near this unusual odour.  peeeeeyou.

NEVER BOOK A GREASE TRAP CLEANING DURING OFFICE HOURS.  HOLY F***STICKS.  I’m as far as I can get from it, but I must needs be here until the bitter end because I must needs pay the man.  All this to prevent the City of Burnaby from fining my ass for putting more than a certain ppm of fat down the drain.

One thing and another

Keith and Paul were in the shop today, which was delightful and brief.  I owe Keith money for the beer he picked up last night.  I suppose it being a long weekend and me going to a party tonight (first one in AGESSSS) I should purchase more.  Ziva died – vacuum leaks, more of them, rad problems, sensor and indication problems.  No can get fixed until Tuesday and candidly I am doubting even then.  Sue is going to give me the name of her auto broker.  Ziva has broken my heart and my wallet long enough, I could have bought two decent cars for what I’ve spent on repairs.  Wayne picked up the 50 biscotti I baked for the Hyack Swim Meet volunteers.  I included promo!  This is an improvement.  Also, we are in the flyer for the event, in two places, so instead of spending a hundred bucks on promo I made cookies.  I like dat.  Katie is going on a date tonight and if I say so much as ONE MORE WORD on the subject she’s gonna jam that broomstick up my nose.  Still haven’t mailed pOp’s biscotti, but Katie is leaving early today so I am going to ask her if I can escape to the Post Office to get it mailed off before she goes.  All the fridges are behaving well.  Katie spilled salt two days running and was yelling v. bad swearz, you know, pin a nun to a wall shit. Split pea with ham soup today.  I need to print more business cards. Started watching The Hour with Ben Whishaw (rowr!), Dominic West (McNulty from the Wire) and the exquisite Romola Garai as Bel Rowley.  It’s a Beeb miniseries set in 1956 Britain and everything about it is wonderful.  Abi Morgan wrote the script, which is uniformly excellent and doesn’t make the assumption that viewers are fecking idiots.  We’re up to episode 8 in Band of Brothers.  Also started watching Aaron McGruder’s Boondocks, which is SO TRANSGRESSIVE.  Jeff and I were killing ourselves laughing.  It is a trip to watch black people commenting about white people (and each other) without having to make concessions to hurting anybody’s feelings.  The grandfather is hilarious.  McGruder is a righteous rude boy and anybody who can call Condoleeza Rice a mass murderer to her face is my kinda guy (John is giving me the spectral thumbs up, I can feel it). My news feed informs me that Rob Ford (Mayor of TO) smokes crack.  Now many times in my life I have wanted to accuse any number of political figures of smoking crack, but jeezly hell my darlings, I wasn’t expecting there to be VIDEO.  The roast beef sandwiches have two new fans.  One of them is a climate change denialist and the other is a very entertaining semi-retired gent who put me onto the idea of starting up a cooperative retirement/nursing home.  I think it’s a fan-fucking-tastic idea.

And your choice of one veggie entree….

In a spectacular outburst of insanity, I may buy a takeout/café.  It’s in a part of Edmonds that is very dead for restaurants, but in about three months the new rec/community center will open and there will actually be more traffic.  I’ll be talking to the current owner on Monday.  It’s a really good deal for the kitchen equipment though… looks like it’s all going for about 30 cents on the dollar.

I HIGHLY RECOMMEND The Impossible, but not if you’re scared to drown.  The lead child actor, Tom Holland, is so good that it is obvious he will have a long and illustrious career, and Naomi Watts and Ewen McGregor are simply wonderful as the parents. It’s about the Boxing Day tsunami.

aw hell, I don’t work there anymore anyway

So once upon a time I had a customer.  A nice one.  Polite, friendly, helpful.
He needed a replacement unit for a customer, we couldn’t ship.
So the customer’s customers, a married couple,  got their litigation on; lawyer’s letter, ugly words exchanged on the phone, BBB threats, I will ruin your reputation, full court press.
Unit FINALLY ships & gets installed.  Customer goes to homeowner getting paperwork signed off and she purrs at him (this the woman who hired a lawyer to sue him) “Wanna go for dinner, my husband’s out of town!”
As I said to the customer, from lawsuit to linguine in one fell swoop.  His comment “I’ve taken one for the team plenty, but I’ve never done THAT.”
We were both howling, it was so funny.  And even funnier because this is an awesome guy, nobody ever LESS deserved to be sued.

Brendan Nagle sez

And I quote (from fb this am).

Five-hundred more layoffs at Quebecorpse. At what point will a commentator inside the accredited news-media tent call themselves out for the empty shell in which they now toil? Thousands of news-gatherers/fact-verifiers have been flushed from accredited news-media outlets (print and broadcast) across the “free” world, yet those few left inside try to uphold the notion of business as usual. It’s not. It’s brutal. The stuff is either stale or woefully void of information relevant to the man/woman on the street. The people at the helm are scared sh*tless and do all they can to homogenize their stuff so as not to p*ss off what few ad buyers are left. When those main ad buyers are various levels of government and their private-enterprise partners — you get the idea. And now spin tanks like the Fraser Institute are spamming overwrought editors with free sh*t that isn’t journalism as much as it is spin, but is residing in the page placements where journalism belongs. That and social media, with its unverified “facts” and photoshopped pictures to buttress whatever cause, are now considered news. Un. Fkn. Believable. Stay low and keep moving.
(he works in the media biz).